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tIBRARV 
THE 

UNIVERSITY  OF  ILLINOIS 


MAI8IAGE«theH01!E 

A  Series  of  Twenty-one 

SUNDAY  EVENING  LECTURES, 

by 

T.  W.  McVETY.A.M.  Ph.D. 


INTRODUCTION  BY 

JOHN  W.  COOK,  LL.  D., 
President  of  the  Illinois  State  University 
at  Normal. 


AND 


REV.  L.  KIRTLY,  D.  D  , 
Pastor  of  First  Baptist  Church,  Peoria. 


TO 

MY  Wlf^E. 
MY  BE3T  F=RIENO, 
AND  THE 
dOY 
DE 
MY  LIFE. 


Copy rig-h ted  in  18% 
by  T.  W.Mc  Vety. 


IVd.i 


Introduction. 


One  of  the  significant  signs  of  the  times  is 
the  wide  range  of  topics  to  which  the  modern 
pulpit  addresses  itself.  No  other  class  has  the 
public  ear  and  the  public  confidence  to  the 
same  degree  as  the  clergy. 

Selected  for  the  express  purpose  of  keepintr 
men  and  women  alive  to  the  most  vital  inter- 
ests, they  occupy  a  vantage  ground  denied  to  all 
others.  We  may  well  complain  of  them  if 
they  do  not  at  least  attempt  to  make  us  behave 
ourselves. 

Standing  in  this  relation  to  the  public  they 
speak  with  a  privilege  ,  and  directness  which 
carry  peculiar  wei</ht.  When  they  enter  upon 
^he  discussion  of  social  questions,  iherefore,  we 
may  expect  a  treatment  which  will  be  practical, 
candid,  and  in  a  peculiar  sense  personal. 

Nor  will  the  significance  of  the  appearance 
of  the  clergy  as  students  of  social  science  be 
fully  appreciated  without  a  clear  recogniticju  of 
the  point  of  view  from  which  the  members  oi 
that  profession  regard  its  problems.  They  are 
n@t  simply  investigators  who  are  endeavoriui^ 
to  reach  new  generalizitions  througli  inductive 
processes.  They  enter  the  arena  with  a  system 
of  developed  tlioiiglit,  well  aj'tien^ated,  and  for- 


tified  by  the  ln£rbest  snnctioa.  It  is  their  fiinc- 
ti(jn  to  apply  their  f aiidamental  i3riiiciples, 
which  have  assmned  a  p  rsilion  of  recoiyniz^d 
authority,  to  the  rei^ulatiou  of  human  conduct 
in  all  the  social  relations  of  the  moih^rn  world. 
The  idea  which  vitalizes  Christianity  is  implicit 
in  all  of  their  treatment.  They  could  not  omit 
it  if  they  would,  becaus^^  of  the  force  of  the  pro- 
fessional liabit;  and  tliey  sh<)uld  not.  if  they 
could  since  its  (nnission  wouhi  deprive  their 
treatment  of  its  most  virile  f.icior.  T  neonl  not 
say  that  I  am  referrin^r  to  tliat  altruistic  spirit 
which  religion  has  contributed  to  occideiital 
civilization. 

The  series  of  sermons  presented  ui  this  vol- 
ume illustrates  in  at;  adnn'rable  way  the  vii/or 
and  fertility  of  resource  , with  which  the  piilpii 
is  bringi  I g  itself  to  bear  upoii  matters  that  re- 
late to  human  happ)iness  afid  well-beinu:  in  the 
most  f)ractical  relations  of  life. 

These  addresses  are  especinlly  timely.  That 
they  will  sober  into  thnui^htf ubiess  the  reckles*^ 
and  impetuous  spirit  of  mnnv  yonn^-  tnen  and 
yonnu:  women  to  whom  a  h?^pny  fortune  may 
brinu:  them.  I  cannot  dnnbt.  That  they  will  re- 
awaken  about  m«ny  a  hearthstone  those  finer 
seritiments  of  affection,  which  the  cares  of  life 
may  have  dulled,  seems  equally  certain.  One 
who  has  spoken  so  plainly,  so  kindly,  and  so 
truthfully  will  not  be  fori^otten  by  those  whose 
lives  will  be  sweetened  by  his  .gracious  ministry. 

JOHN  W.  COOK. 

Normal.  TIL,  March  J,  lS9f5. 


The  oldest,  dearest  and  most  sacred  institu- 
tion on  earth  is  the  family.  It  is  older  than 
the  state,  the  law  or  the  church.  Its  birthplace 
was  in  Eden.  It  exists  in  all  nations,  and 
among  all  races  of  mankind.  The  purity  of  the 
home  is  the  most  sacred  trust  committed  to 
man.  Whatever  contributes  to  its  ideal  reali- 
zation must  meet  with  the  approval  of  all  good 
people.  The  tense  demands  of  the  civilization 
in  wiiicb  we  live,  the  burning  social  problems 
with  which  we  are  confronted  and  the  intricate 
complication  of  business  relations,  are  threaten- 
ing the  invasion  of  this  most  sacred  institution. 
In  consequence  the  tendency  is  to  relegate  to 
chance  or  Providence  the  possibility  of  the 
home,  rather  than  to  grasp  tlie  problems  which 
we  must  solve,  and  seize  the  duties  which  we 
must  perfoiin  in  order  to  its  proper  upbuilding 

TliislittV  book  of  Ipctures  which  comes  fresh 
and  warm  from  the  brain  and  heart  of  a  busy 
pnstor,  my  friend  in  his  ordinary  pnlpit  minis- 
trations, is  intended  to  assist  busy  people  in 
that  most  nn porta nt  life  work— the  building 
of  the  home.  And  this  it  does  in  the  sugges- 
tions with  which  it  abounds,  the  sharp  incisive 
contrasts  with  which  it  breathes;  the  genial  wit 
with  which  it  huV)bles,  the  keen  invectives  with 
which  it  hurtles,  the  purity,  it  inculcates,  the 
sympathy  it  warms  and  the  aspirations  it  stirs. 

May  the  larger  audience  to  which  these  lec- 
tures are  now  given  be  as  much  helped  as  the 
one  to  which  they  were  first  delivered. 

L.  KIKTLY, 


Contents. 


LECTURE  PAGE. 

I.    The  Affections  and  Courtship   9. 

II.    Marriage   17. 

III.  Woman's  Rights   27. 

IV.  Is  Man  too  Prolific?   37- 

V.  The  Selection  of  a  Wife   47. 

VI.  The  Choice  of  a  Husband   56. 

VII.  The  Model  Wife   ..  60. 

VIII.    The  Model  Husband   77. 

IX.    Model  Parents   87, 

X.  Traininj^:  Children   97. 

XI.  Mission  of  the  Child  in  the  Home . .  107. 

XII.  The  Model  Home  117. 

XIII.  Heredity  127. 

XIV.  Divorce  137. 

XV.  The  Model  Yoan^r  Man  148. 

XVI.  Mistakes  of  Youn,i<  Men  159. 

XVII.  Pushing  to  the  Front  169. 

XVIII.    The  Ideal  Youn^  Woman  183 

XIX.    The  Old  Fv>lks  at  tlome   196. 

XX.    Degrees  in  Heav(^n  206. 

XXI.    Our  Heavenly  H^nne  2i(>. 


Preface. 


The  contents  of  this  book  aj)peaiTd  in  the 
press  from  week  to  week  as  they  were  delivered 
It  was  thought  advisable  to  have  them  appear 
in  more  permanent  form,  and  hence  before  the 
typf^  w.'iS  destroyt-d  they  assumed  the  propor- 
tions r)f  a  b(>ok.  They  appear  as  they  were 
delivered  without  any  revision  by  the  author? 
and  I  reoret  that  enviidnments  over  which  I 
had  no  control  rendered  it  impossible  for  me  to 
read  the  proof  sheets,  or  give  those  finishing 
touches  so  desirable  in  a  book.  These  addresses 
were  delivered  during  the  warm  summer  months 
and  are  intended  for  the  average  home.  It  will 
be  most  gratifying  indeed  if  they  shall  brighten 
to  the  smallest  extent  the  homes  they  visit. 

T.  W.  McVETY. 


LIBRARY 
■  THE 

UNIVERSITY  OF  ILLINOlj 


FIRST  M.  E.  CHURCH,  PEORIA,  Ihh. 


The  Affeciions  and  Courtship,  , 

''It  appears  unaccountable  that  our  teachers 
generally  have  directed  their  instructions  to  the 
head,  with  very  little  attention  to  the  heart. 
From  Aristotle  down  to  Locke,  books  without 
number  have  been  composed  for  cultivating  and 
improving  the  undei standing,  but  few,  in  pro- 
portion, for  cultivating  and  improving  the 
affections." — Kaimes. 

What  is  the  scope  of  the  pulpit?  Bishop  Foss 
asks,  ''Shall  the  minister  preach  about  politics, 
municipal  reform,  courtship,  marriage,  divorce, 
the  theatre,  dancing,  temperance,  the  suppress- 
ion of  the  liquor  traffic,  the  relations  of  capital 
to  labor,  tenement  houses,  the  water  supply  of 
cities,  Sunday  newspapers,  biogenesis,  evolu- 
tion? Certainly  if  he  knows  enough  to  do  it 
wisely.  All  these  things  lie  within  his  range  as 
a  man  divinely  called  to  stand  in  the  front  rank 
of  the  moral  and  religious  teachers  of  the  world." 
I  have  selected  a  course  of  topics  on  the  home 
for  discussion  during  these  warm  summer 
months.  My  lectures  shall  be  intensely  practi- 
cal, and  touch  every  phase  of  home  life.  I 
shall  be  free  from  sensation  in  its  common  in- 
terpretation, and  hope  to  inspire  loftier  concep- 
tions of  marriage,  nobler  views  of  life,  and  also 
condemn  the  laxity  of  our  laws  on  marriage. 
If  I  can  bring  sunshine  into  more  homes,  and 


10 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


aid  in  clearer  views  of  our  relation  to  each  other, 
and  our  responsibility  to  the  home  and  the 
state,  I  shall  feel  well  recompensed  for  my 
labors, 

MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 

The  family  is  the  oldest  organization  known 
to  history,  and  the  most  important.  It  is  a 
miniature  school,  a  miniature  state  and  a  minia- 
ture church;  and  the  foundation  of  all  govern- 
ment. It  has  been  rightly  said  that  the  four 
sweetest  words  of  the  English  language  are 
Mother,  Home,  Jesus  and  Heaven. 

"It  matters  not  how  drear  the  spot, 
How  proud  or  poor  the  dome, 

Love  still  retauis  unbroken  chains, 
That  binds  the  heart  to  home.'' 

This  evening  I  shall  address  you  on  the  af- 
fections and  courtship. 

THE  hermit's  life  IS  AN  UNNATURAL  ONE. 

In  the  long  past  many  thought  they  were  do- 
ing God's  will  by  living  in  solitude  in  caves, 
and  in  the  wilderness.  Nearly  600  years  before 
Christ  the  artificial  caves  of  India  were  occu- 
pied by  Buddhistical  monks.  The  origin  of 
monasticism  is  enshrouded  in  mystery;  it  is  not 
of  christian  or  heavenly  origin,  but  of  heathen 
and  earthly .  A  man  who  does  not  love  society 
is  a  social  deformity.  Gcd  said  in  the  very  be- 
ginning, "It  is  not  good  for  man  to  be  alone," 


THE  AFFECTIONS  AND  COURTSHIP  11 


^nd  the  world  has  demonstrated  the  truthful- 
ness of  the  divine  word.  I  have  seen  such 
s^ross  deformities  among  men  who  loved  to  pose 
as  women  haters,  and  flattered  their  intellectual 
pride  that  they  were  made  of  finer  clay  than 
ordinary  men;  and  I  have  seen  women  who 
hated  men  apparently,  but  either  they  were  not 
sincere  or  else  their  affections  were  poorly  de- 
veloped. -  It  is  complimentary  to  a  woman  to 
appreciate  gentlemen's  society,  and  it  made  all 
the  more  illustrious,  the  illustrious  Frances  E. 
Willard  when  she  said,  ''She  loved  the  men; 
her  father  was  a  man."  Man  cannot  develop 
alone;  he  would  be  destitute  of  the  inspiration 
that  comes  frcm  competition  and  ambition:  the 
world  could  not  be  civilized,  and  the  great 
schools,  churches,  inventions,  discoveries  and 
co-operation  of  labor  would  be  unknown.  Men 
confined  in  the  solitary  have  become  despond- 
ent, and  often  insane.  The  desire  for  society 
has  made  our  great  cities,  and  is  a  very  strong 
factor  in  the  church  and  the  family.  The  fishes 
in  the  brooks,  the  birds  of  the  air,  the  beasts  of 
the  field,  and  man  at  his  best  all  follow  their 
God-given  instincts  and  seek  society.  Count 
DeLauzan  was  confined  in  prison  for  nine  years, 
and  finding  a  spider  in  his  cell  he  tried  to  tame 
it,  and  hold  fellowship  with  it,  and  wh^^n  the 
jailor  cruelly  killed  it  he  felt  disappointed  for 


12 


MAKRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


months. 

''O  solitude  where  are  the  char.ns?  * 
Which  sages  have  seen  in  thy  face, 

Better  dwell  in  the  midst  of  alarms 
Than  reign  in  fhis  horrible  place. 

I  am  out  of  humanities'  reach, 
I  must  finish  my  journey  alone, 

Never  hear  the  sweet  music  of  speech 
While  I  start  at  the  sound  of  my  own." 

GOD  MADE  us  SOCIAL  BEINGS. 

He  organized  us  into  the  family,  and  the 
whole  bible  from  beginning  to  end,  the  ten  com- 
mandments, the  Sermon  on  the  Mount,  and  the 
gospel  in  its  very  design  is  for  man  in  society. 
God  endowed  us  with  affections,  ^'created  us  in 
his  image,  and  Grod  is  love."  We  were  created 
in  the  image  of  love.  Love,  the  supreme  affec- 
tion conquers  all  our  enemies,  and  has  estab- 
lished the  kingdom  of  Jesus  Christ  upon  the 
earth.  This  affection  is  the  one  great  need  of 
the  world  today ;  and  hearts  are  breaking  the 
wide  world  over  for  want  of  sympathy,  for  want 
of  appreciation. 

THE  AFFECTIONS  SHOULD  BE  CULTIVATED. 

The  evils  of  life  arise  more  from  the  lack  of 
their  development,  than  from  the  development 
of  the  understanding.  If  the  affections  between 
husband  and  wife,  between  parent  and  child, 
between  brother  and  sister,  between  young  men 


THE  AFFECTIONS  AND  COURTSHIP 


rs 


and  women  were  properly  developed  what  a 
millenium  it  would  bring  to  the  social  world. 
How  much  sunshine  and  happiness  can  one 
pure  person  bring  into  your  life. 

Michael  Angelo  in  speaking  of  the  influence 
of  one  person,  says: 

"The  might  of  one  fair  face  sublimes  my  life. 
For  it  hath  weaned  my  heart  from  low  desires ; 
Nor  death  I  heed,  nor  purgatorial  fires. 
Thy  beauty,  antepast  of  jovs  above, 
Instruct  me  in  the  bliss  that  saints  approve; 
For  Oh!  how  good,  how  beautiful  must  be 
The  God  that  made  so  good  a  thing  as  thee. 
So  fair  an  image  of  the  heavenly  dove. 
Forgive  me  if  I  cannot  turn  away 
From  those  sweet  eyes  that  are  my  earthly  heaven  ; 
For  they  are  guiding  stars,  benignly  given 
To  tempt  my  footsteps  to  the  upward  way  ; 
And  if  1  a  well  too  fondly  in  thy  sight, 
I  live  and  love  in  God's  peculiar  light." 

THE  SECOND  POINT  OF  MY  LECTURE  IS  COURTSHIP. 

Courtship  does  not  receive  the  attention  so 
sacred  a  subject  demands.  It  is  spoken  of  with 
puns,  and  jokes,  and  laughter,  and  considered  a 
period  in  life  of  romantic  visions  of  future  bliss, 
or  present  halos  of  social  delight.  Courtship 
is  right  and  honorable  and  should  always  be 
pursued  under  proper  surroundings.  It  is  one 
of  the  gravest  aft'airs  of  life,  for  it  leads  to  mat- 
rimony, and  that  means  a  home  of  bitterness,  or 
one  of  delight. 


14 


MARRIAGE  AND   THE  HOME 


COURTSHIP    IS  THE  TIME  TO    STUDY  CHARACTER. 

There  is  frequently  too  much  blind  attach- 
ment, and  brainless  love  during  courtship. 
With  many  it  is  the  veal  period  of  their  lives 
and  that  period  continues  a  long  time.  People 
who  are  preparing  for  teaching,  or  the  practice 
of  law,  or  medicine,  or  any  department  of  life 
put  brain  into  the  preparation,  but  alas,  in 
courtship  it  is  too  often  a  mere  animal  affection, 
a  blind  man's  buff  game  intellectually,  devoid 
of  reason,  and  with  no  thought  of  the  moral  and 
intellectual  affinities  existing  between  them. 
The  young  man  and  woman  are  both  attired  in 
faultless  wardrobe,  and  wreathed  in  smiles,  and 
the  temporary  environments,  and  the  charms  of 
personal  appearance  are  often  the  winning  argu- 
ments in  the  case;  hence  there  are  so  many  dis- 
appointed married  lives.  The  charms  of  mere 
physical  beauty  must  fade  away  day  by  day, 
and  at  its  best  is  not  very  wearable  in  every  day 
life,  and  all  who  have  married  for  these  charms 
are  doomed  to  disappointment.  Beauty  of  in- 
tellect, beauty  of  character  will  grow  brighter 
and  brighter  even  into  the  eternities  of  God 
while  beauty  of  person  will  fade  as  the  leaf,  and 
can  never  be  reckoned  among  the  substantials 
and  essentials  of  the  married  life. 

I  do  not  underestimate  the  physical  purposes 
of  life,  but  reject  the  infidel  attack  made  upon 


THE  AFFECTIONS  AND  COURTSHIP 


15 


the  family,  and  which  would  destroy  the  conju- 
gal tie,  and  degrade  man  to  the  level  of  the 
brute.  It  is  not  at  all  surprising  that  with  such 
low  views  of  marriage  so  many  courtships  have 
been  unworthy  and  impure.  If  we  look  upon 
marriage  in  its  true  light,  in  its  moral  and 
scriptural  designs,  then  courtship  shall  be  a 
school  in  w^hich  the  highest  excellencies  of  our 
affections  shall  be  developed,  and  in  which 
character  shall  be  well  studied. 

SOME  OF  THE  EVILS  OF  COURTSHIP. 

There  must  be  no  duplicity  during  courtship. 
To  impress  a  young  lady  that  she  is  your  choice, 
and  so  continue  when  you  have  no  thought  of 
matrimony,  and  your  only  aiai  is  to  have  an 
enjoyable  time  while  she  interprets  you  as  look- 
ing towards  matrimony  is  dishonest  and  un- 
manly. If  it  is  understood  that  you  are  merely 
going  with  each  other  to  have  a  pleasant  time 
and  both  parties  are  of  age  there  can  be  no 
great  objections  raised,  but  the  conventional 
flirtations  are  triflin^^  and  often  iniquitous. 
There  should  always  be  long  acquaintance,  but 
short  engagements.  Avoid  marriage  without 
courtship,  and  beware  of  strangers.  I  married 
a  couple  the  first  day  tney  ever  saw  each  other, 
and  they  lived  together  just  six  weeks.  He  ad- 
vertised for  a  wife  and  she  was  the  first  bidder; 
and  she  asked  him  only  two  questions:  the  one 


16 


MARRIAGE  AND   THE  HOME 


was  "if  he  were  a  foreisfner,*'  and  the  other  was 
"if  he  drank  intoxicants,"  and  on  receiving  the 
answer,  "no,"  she  accepted  him.  She  was  not 
as  particular  in  p^etting  a  husband  as  she  would 
be  in  getting  a  bonnet,  and  he  was  nothing  and 
he  got  nothing,  and  so  there  was  affinity  be- 
tween them  There  are  thousands  of  young 
women  with  broken  hearts,  and  blightf  d  lives 
who  have  been  unwise  in  marrying  strangers  in 
haste.  Young  ladies  should  never  be  engaged 
without  parental  counsel  on  the  subject  before- 
hand. There  can  be  no  ideal  courtship  unless 
it  is  free  from  the  money  consideration.  Farms 
are  good  and  so  are  bank  notes,  and  fine  houses, 
but  it  is  base  deception  to  marry  these,  and  take 
the  young  man  or  woman  with  them  as  a  sort 
of  quit  claim  deed  to  them.  Unless  the  young 
man  can  make  a  living,  and  is  working  at  it,  and 
has  proven  his  ability  to  bring  things  to  pass 
he  ought  not  to  be  considered.  To  marry  be- 
cause it  is  the  last  chance,  or  because  you  are 
tired  of  home  without  any  thought  as  to  the 
fitness  of  things  is  sure  to  bring  repentance  at 
leisure.  I  hope  you  will  look  upon  courtship 
as  one  of  the  greatest  opportunities  of  your  life, 
and  from  the  high  grounds  of  your  moral  and 
intellectual  2.ffinities,  and  be  warned  that  mis- 
takes made  here  can  ne^er  be  rectified  in  this 
life. 


MARRIAGE 


17 


MARRIAGE, 

Marriage  is  honorable  in  all. — St.  Paui. 

Hail  wedded  Jove,  mysterious  law;   true  source 

Of  human  offspring. — Milton. 
Marriages  are  made  in  Heaven. — Tennyson. 

A  v\ orld-without-end-bargain. 

— Love's  Labor's  Lost. 
We  have  for  our  discussion  this  evening  one 
of  the  very  gravest  subjects  of  life — Marriage. 

ITS  IMPORTANCE  AND  ENDORSEMENT. 

There  is  no  greater  institution  than  the  fam- 
ily, and  no  obligations  more  sacred  than  the 
wedding  vow.  Creation  from  base  to  finial  was 
a  rising  climax:  from  the  shajieless,  voidless 
heaven  and  earth  massed  together  there  came 
in  the  divine  order,  the  separation  of  the  heav- 
ens and  the  earth,  the  greater  and  lesser  lights, 
the  vegetable  world,  the  fishes  of  the  seas,  the 
birds  of  the  air,  the  beasts  of  the  field,  and  last 
man,  the  very  lord  of  all  ^creation,  made  in  the 
image  of  God;  and  yet  the  tiiiishiDg  touch,  the 
last  ^reat  and  most  refined  part  of  all  God's 
works,  the  crowning  ot  the  climax  was  lacking, 
and  then  God  made  woman,  and  of  alibis  works 
a  ]3ure,  lovely  and  coiisecrated  woman  is  the 
fairest,  ^an  was  not  made  to  be  alone,  or 
woman  "dimply  to  be  admired,  but   they  were 


18 


MARKIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


made  for  each  other,  the  one  the  complement 
of  the  other,  and  God  joined  them  together  in 
holy  wedlock,  and  in  this  union  only  is  man  at 
his  best  and  most  complete.  Jesus  Christ 
blessed  with  his  presence  the  marriage  at  Cana 
of  Galilee,  and  there  wrought  his  first  miracle. 
He  said  ^'for  this  cause  shall  a  man  leave  his 
father  and  mother  and  shall  cleave  unto  his 
wife:  and  they  twain  shall  be  one  flesh."  The 
Christian  church  has  set  her  seal  upon  the 
sanctity  of  marriage,  and  in  our  beautiful  cere- 
mony it  represents  the  union  between  Christ 
and  his  church . 

MAN  DEVELOPS  BETTER. 

Man's  unity  and  highest  development  is  at- 
tained in  matrimony.  The  work  of  men  and 
women  can  never  be  the  same  in  all  respects: 
the  man  is  brave,  the  woman  sympathetic,  the 
man  is  stronger  physically,  the  woman  cherishes 
and  cares  for  the  family,  and  every  child  needs 
for  its  best  discipline  both  parents. 

''As  UDto  the  bow  the  cord  is, 

80  anto  the  man  is  woman  : 

Though  she  beads  him  she  obeys  him  ; 

Though  she  draws  him,  yet  she  follows  ; 

Useless  each  vvithout  the  other." 

— Longfellow. 


MARRIAGE 


19 


Bismark  said,  "my  wife  has  made  me  what  I 
am."  Socrates  said  he  owed  his  greatness  to  the 
discipline  his  wife  sfave  him.  Burke  said,  ''Ev- 
ery care  vanishes  the  moment  I  enter  my  wife's 
presence."  Some  great  men  have  never  mar- 
ried, but  they  might  have  been  greater  had  they 
done  so.  Had  Cowper  had  a  cheerful  wife  he 
never  would  have  gone  to  Black  Friar's  bridge 
in  London  to  take  his  life;  had  Hume  and  Gib- 
bon married  consecrated  christian  women  they 
never  would  have  left  to  the  world  so  much  bald 
infidelity.  Married  men  live  longer,  and  are 
more  moral,  and  furnish  fewer  criminals.  Mat- 
rimony is  the  door  that  opens  to  us  the  most  en- 
dearing relations  of  life.  It  gives  us  father  . and 
mother,  husband  and  wife,  parent  and  child, 
brother  and  sister,  and  oceans  of  love  that  have 
never  been  fatliomed.  What  a  bereav<^d  world 
we  would  have  if  you  were  to  subtract  the  in- 
fluence of  just  one  word  from  it — mother. 
What  reckless  men  the  world  would  have  were 
it  not  for  the  little  ones  at  home  looking  to 
them  for  example;  what  vagrants  many  men 
would  be  were  it  not  for  one  true  heart  in  the 
home --the  wife.  Marriage  is  of  heaven,  ordered 
of  God,  and  without  it  there  is  no  salvation  for 
the  world.  When  Joseph  Cook  was  once  sail- 
ing up  the  Danube  in  a  steamboat  he  said  to  an 
English  lord,  a  German  professor,  and  an  Amer- 


20 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


ican  politician  who  were  on  board,  ''we  are  leav- 
ing the  domain  of  the  Koran,  and  are  coming 
into  that  of  the  old  fashioned  book  called  the 
scriptures."  ''I  know  It,"  said  the  Massachus- 
etts politician.  "We  are  more  indebted  to  the 
Bible,  and  its  ideas  of  marriao^e,  than  to  all  Ko- 
man,  Greek,  or  Ene;'lish  law.  I  never  appreci- 
ated the  fact  before."  Said  the  Grerman  pro- 
fessor, ''T  have  be^ii  thinkia^:  how,  through  all 
modern  history,  ihe  Biblical  ideas  of  marriage 
move  as  the  sweet  waters  of  the  Jordan  through 
the  Dead  Sea."  The  Rno  lish  lord  said  "I  know 
what  came  to  us  out  of  Grreece;  I  know  what 
Britain  has  inherited  from  Rome;  but  if  we  are 
to  express  our  opinions  as  to  the  dictates  of 
experience  on  this  theme,  if  we  are  to  take 
science  and  history  for  our  guides,  as  we  cou- 
trast  minarets  for  experience  on  one  side,  and 
spires  for  experience  on  the  other,  we  shall  fall 
on  our  knees  on  the  deck  of  this  vessel,  and 
thank  God  that  we  were  brought  up  in  homes 
of  the  Biblical  species." 

WHY  DO  PEOPLE  MARRY? 

Is  it  for  a  living,  for  an  easier  time,  for  money, 
for  social  position,  for  mere  companionship,  to 
have  someone  care  for  you  when  you  are  older? 
There  are  many  who  marry  for  all  these  reasons, 
and  all  such  marriages  are  unworthy  and  de- 
grading.   Marriages  are  often  the  most  selfish 


MARRIAGE 


21 


and  dishonest  transactions  of  life.  If  two  par- 
ties are  ^^^^^  business  they  are  frank  and 
careful  to  put  equal  shares  into  the  business, 
but  in  matrimony  there  is  often  the  blackest 
deception.  The  young  man  whose  only  quali- 
fications are  those  of  the  dude,  and  who  is  ad- 
mired by  many  young  ladies  because  he  is  the 
finest  advertisement  for  the  tailor,  plies  all  his 
arts  to  win  the  attention  of  a  young  woman  with 
money,  or  apparently  he  falls  in  love  with  a 
lady  30  years  older  than  himself  who  is  very 
wealthy,  and  with  the  blackest  deception  and 
hypocrisy  he  fawns  upon  her;  and  adores  her; 
and  marries  her  money.  Nordau  looks  upon 
that  man  as  deep  in  infamy  as  the  scarlet 
woman  who  seeks  money  by  the  sale  of  her  per- 
son. There  are  many  gold  hunters  under  the 
guise  of  matrimony.  The  man  who  thus  mar- 
ries, puts  on  his  black  crape,  lies  to  deceive  the 
community  when  his  wife  dies,  arid  to  continue 
to  cover  up  his  base  deception.  This  is  true  of 
many  men,  bat  alas,  it  is  also  true  of  many 
women.  The  parents  have  encouraged  them  to 
flatter  the  rich  young  bachelor,  or  the  wealthy 
man  at  twice  their  own  age,  and  once  more  un- 
der the  guise  of  having  their  hearts  won  by  love 
they  are  won  by  money  and  ease  and  luxury. 
Many  of  the  children  of  Israel  are  still  down  on 
their  knees  before  the  golden   calf,  and  turn 


22- 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


aside  from  brain,  and  honor,  and  heroism  and 
character  and  marry  a  ^(^olden  calf  and  one  who 
can  never  be  anything  more  thsn  a  calf.  Many 
others  marry  to  live  together  in  selfishness  and 
happiness,  and  put  their  fortunes  together  re- 
gardless of  the  world's  future.  The  priests  be- 
lieve in  celebacy,  and  if  their  hi^h  ideal  were 
carried  out  the  world  would  end  and  so  would 
it  be  with  all  who  disregarded  the  great  physi- 
ological argument  for  the  preservation  of  the 
race. 

TRUE  LOVE  IS  THE  ONLY  BASTS  FOR  MATRIMONY. 

I  think  that  Grod  sends  a  supreme  affection 
to  everyone  at  some  period  in  life.  There  are 
countless  married  people  today  who  had  they 
to  do  the  courting,  make  the  engagement  and 
get  married  over  again  would  never  marry  their 
present  companion.  They  got  married  from 
blind  attachment,  or  policy,  or  for  some  other 
sinister  motive.  Their  children,  and  public 
opinion,  and  regard  for  their  wedding  vow  have 
held  them  together.  They  have  been  passive 
in  love,  and  hence  we  have  so  many  disappoint- 
ed married  lives,  and  if  their  hearts  were  en- 
graven on  the  printed  page  it  would  read,  ''I 
married  the  wrong  man,"  or  "the  wrong  wom- 
an." The  only  basis  is  true  love;  then  the  lives 
will  assimilate,  and  flow  together  and  harmoni- 
ously blend  until  the  picture  is  complete.  This 


MARRIAGE 


23 


love  1ms  no  old  age  and  never  fails.  Cornelia, 
wife  of  Titus  Gracchus,  was  left  a  widow  with 
twelve  children.  She  refused  the  hand  of 
Ptolemy  king  of  Egypt  in  marriage;  and  Vale- 
rius Maximus  said,  "The  buried  ashes  of  her 
husband  seemed  to  lie  so  cold  to  her  heart  that 
the  splendour  of  a  diadem,^  and  all  the  pomp  of 
a  rich  kingdom  were  not  able  to  warm  it  so  as 
to  make  it  capable  of  receiving  the  impression 
of  a  new  love.''  Washington  Irving  had  this 
supreme  affection  though  he  never  married  as 
under  his  pillow  was  found  a  lock  of  hair  and  a 
miniature.  I  use  these  illustrations  to  make 
forcible  supreme  love,  and  not  to  oppose  second 
marriages  for  I  have  known  the  second  to  be 
happier  than  the  first. 

PEOPLE  WHO  SHOULD  NEVER  MARRY. 

If  an  impure  woman  is  unfitted  for  matrimony 
so  is  a  beastish  man.  If  there  is  one  person  on 
this  earth  that  tries  the  atonement  more  than 
another  it  is  the  libertine.  The  impure  man 
has  no  right  to  live  with  a  pure  woman  and  be- 
come the  father  of  children.  Grod  never  de- 
signed that  social  purity  and  social  filth  should 
be  yoked  together,  "Dip  the  soul  in  the  seas 
of  ink  and  it  ceases  to  become  really  marriage- 
able. Put  out  the  fire  of  honor  in  the  heart, 
and  it  cannot  be  made  warm  at  a  blazing  fire- 
side.   These  men  who  shiver  through  the  ways 


24 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


of  vice,  their  skeleton  souls  without  trust,  how 
shall  they  be  warm  before  their  future  hearth- 
stones? The  leper  puts  out  his  own  family  fire. 
Treat  one  human  being  in  an  infamous  manner, 
and  you  never  will  treat  another  human  being 
in  the  manner  provided  by  natural  law." — Cook. 

Ill-health  should  be  a  great  barrier  to  matri- 
mony. Persons  with  lung  disease,  and  insanity 
in  the  family  ought  to  remain  single  for  there- 
by great  suffering  has  been  entailed  on  the 
world.  Drunkenness  should  unfit  people  for 
matrimony  for  two  reasons;  for  the  comfort  of 
the  wife  and  because  the  sins  of  the  father  are 
visited  upon  his  children  and  every  child  has  a 
right  to  be  born  well.  No  woman  should  marry 
a  drunkard  to  reform  him,  nor  should  she  ever 
marry  an  imbecile,  an  incapable  or  a  sot;  better 
many  times  told  lead  an  honorable  maiden  life 
than  be  the  slave  of  an  unworthy  man. 

TIME  TO  MARRY. 

Perhaps  no  time  can  be  set  by  the  almanac, 
but  all  should  be  well  developed  physically  and 
progressing  mentally  and  morally.  Twenty-one 
is  young  enough  for  the  young  woman  and 
twenty-five  for  the  young  man.  The  business 
in  life  should  be  chosen  and  good  preparation 
made  for  life  before  matrimony.  Many  bind 
galling  chains  upon  themselves  for  life  by  pre- 
mature marriages.    Dr.  Durbin,  one  of  our  fin- 


MARRIAGE 


25 


est  orators  and  scholars,  said  he  would  not  look 
upon  a  maiden  for  seven  years  until  he  finished 
his  college  courses,  and  he  kept  his  vow.  The 
school  life,  the  intellectual  development  is 
dwarfed  frequently  by  too  early  marriage. 
Many  mari'y  before  they  have  acquired  a  taste 
for  reading,  or  settled  in  business,  and  then  the 
cares  of  the  family  are  added,  and  not  one  book 
per  year  is  read.  They  could  trum  a  little  on 
the  piano  before  they  were  married  but  now 
they  have  forgotten  even  that,  aad  they  have  no 
taste  for  reading  and  when  old  age  comes  on, 
time  will  hang  heavy  on  their  hands  for  there 
is  nothing  they  can  they  do,  and  are  unhappy. 
Too  much  society  in  school  years  is  poison  to 
mental  discipline,  and  marriage  should  never 
be  looked  upon  as  the  great  object  of  life  as 
some  seem  to  view  it.  Get  ready  for  life  and 
then  we  are  ready  for  marriage;  get  feady  in 
education  and  business  and  in  purity  and  then 
are  we  ready  for  all  the  events  of  life.  Cornelia, 
mother  of  the  Gracchi  advised  her  sons  to  keep 
13ure.  "Your  best  ijreservation  is  anticipation, 
Think  that  you  wish  to  win  a  white  soul,  and 
you  wouM  be  unwilling  to  give  less  than  you 
bargain  for.  In  the  midst  of  the  corruptions 
of  Rome,  remembf^r  that  she  who  is  to  be  to  you 
what  I  have  been  to  Titus  Gracchus  will  require 
if  she  is  what  I  am,  that  you  should  be   to  her 


26 


MAREIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


what  Titus  Gracchus  was  to  me  Prepare  afar 
off  for  the  event  which  Providence  prepares 
afar  off  for  you." 

The  marriage  ceremony  is  more  than  a  civil 
rite,  it  is  a  religious  ceremony..  Better  exalt  it 
to  be  a  saciament  than  to  degrade  it  to  be  a 
mere  contract.  The  bible  prescribes  for  it,  and 
all  the  relations  of  the  family  are  ordered  by  in- 
spiration. Let  infidels  and  unbelievers  be  mar- 
ried if  they  choose  by  aldermen  and  magistrates, 
but  believers  in  God  should  never  rule  God  out 
of  this  most  important  event  in  life.  Let  the 
man  who  marries  them  be  able  to  say,  "I  an 
ordained  minister  of  Jesus  Christ,  by  the  laws 
of  God,  and  the  laws  of  man,  pronounce  you  to 
be  husband  and  wife  together,  in  the  name  of 
the  Father,  and  the  Son,  and  the  Holy  Ghost," 
Amen. 


LIBRARY 
■  THE 

UNIVERSITY  OF  ILLINOIS 


LUCILLE  Mc\'ETY. 


27 


WOMAN'S  RIGHTS, 

I^^Gtur©  III. 

Neither  is  the  woman  withoat  the  man,  nor  the 
man  withoat  the  woman,,  in  the  Lord.  For  as  -jhe 
woman  is  of  the  man,  so  is  the  man  also  by  the 
woman  ;  but  all  things  are  of  God. — St.  Paul. 

Woman's  empire,  holier,  more  refined, 
Moulds,-  moves,  and  swayes  the  fallen, 

yet  God- breathed  mind, 
Lifting  tne  earth-crushed  heart  to  hope 

and  heaven.  —Hale. 

Not  she  with  trait'rous  kiss  the  Saviour  stung. 
Not  she  denied  him  with  unholy  tongue; 
She,  while  apostles  shrank,  could  danger  bravt^. 
Last  at  his  cross,  and  earliest  at  his  grave. 

— Barrett. 

There  are  few  subjects  on  which  there  is  so 
much  random  speaking  and  writing  as  the  sub- 
ject of  Woman's  Rights,  Some  write  as  if  the 
two  sexes  were  opposed  to  each  other,  and  the 
time  had  come  when  woman  should  rebel,  throw 
off  the  yoke  of  bondage,  and  be  emancipated 
from  the  thraldom  of  masculine  slavery.  It  is 
true  that  many  women  have  been,  and  are  great- 
ly ox3pressed;  and  it  is  also  irue  that  there  is  a 
class  of  women  who  dip  their  pens  in  sarcasm 
and  irony  and  assail  the  men  as  if  they  wilfully 


28 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


and  cruelly  tortured  the  women.  Of  all  the 
ages  of  the  world's  history  this  is  the  poorest 
for  such  an  assault.  There  never  was  an  age 
when  husbands  and  fathers  sacrificed  more,  and 
were  readier  for  martyrdom  if  need  be  for  their 
wives  and  daughters. 

WOMAN  HAS  NOT  HAD  HER  RIGHTS. 

In  the  long  past  she  has  been  looked  upon  as 
brainless  and  soulless,  and  was  a  slave  to  her 
husband.  In  China  infanticide  was  common, 
and  a  girl  child  has  been  bought  for  a  dime;  in 
India  wives  have  been  burned  on  the  bodies  of 
their  husbands;  the  Bhuddists  taught  that 
woman's  only  hope  was  to  be  turned  into  a  man 
in  the  next  world;  Mohammedans  taught  in  the 
Koran  that,  "men  shall  have  the  pre-eminence 
above  their  wives."  Under  Roman  law  she  had 
no  voice  in  the  family,  and  the  husband  looked 
on  his  wife  as  any  other  piece  of  property. 
Confucius  taught  and  gave  seven  reasons  for 
divorce,  and  this  will  give  you  some  idea  of  her 
position.  "If  she  be  childless;  if  she  be  un- 
faithful to  her  wedding  vows;  if  she  be  jealous 
of  the  clothes  of  other  women  or  of  her  hus- 
band; if  she  be  dishonest;  if  she  be  sickly;  if 
she  disobeys  her  mother-in-law;  if  she  talks  too 
much."  Louis  XI  WTjuld  not  look  on  his  first 
child  because  it  was  a  girl; in  Athens  at  the 
birth  of  a  girl  the   father  ordered  a  distaff  tus- 


woman's  rights 


29 


pended  outside  the  door  while  the  birth  of  a  boy 
was  announced  by  a  garland  of  olives.  Woman 
has  not  had  her  rights  in  education,  in  society, 
in  business  and  in  reHgion,  neither  has  man. 
He  has  been  bought  and  sold  like  cattle,  and 
slaughtered  in  the  circus  with  heartless  cruelty, 
and  Rome's  lovely  maidens  and  cultured  women 
greeted  their  ears,  and  feasted  their  eyes  with 
the  groans  of  the  butchered  thousands.  What 
has  been  the  cause  of  all  this  cruelty;  it  is  heath- 
enism. Heathenism  seized  woman  as  she  stood 
in  the  image  of  God  on  the  far  off  sixth  day  of 
creation,  and  cursed  her  with  all  the  woes  of  the 
long  centuries. 

CHRISTIANITY  HAS  REDEEMED  HER. 

The  bible  taught  the  sanctity  of  marriage, 
and  the  life-union  of  one  man  with  one  woman, 
and  husbands  were  to  love  their  wives  as  their 
own  bodies  and  as  Christ  loved  the  church.  It 
taught  social  purity  and  one  standard  of  moral- 
ity for  both  sexes,  and  Jesus  Christ  associated 
with  women  and  saved  them.  Christianity  has 
redeemed  India  from  the  burning  of  wives  on 
the  dead  bodies  of  their  husbands,  and  China 
from  infanticide,  and  lifted  woman  up  to  her 
original  position,  Christianity  through  the 
Methodist  church  has  accorded  to  woman  the 
right  of  public  speech  in  church.  The  rostrum 
sx)eakers  and  writers  for  the  joress  have  aided  in 


BO 


MARRIAGE  AND   THE  HOME 


the  last  fifty  years  in  agitatino-  public  opinion, 
but  it  is  Christianity  and  the  advancinf^  civili- 
zation which  has  come  through  the  gospel  of 
our  blessed  Lord  that  has  redeemed  her.  The 
difference  between  woman  in  China  and  darkest 
Africa,  and  in  Christian  America  is  the  differ- 
ence of  plus  or  minus  the  bible.  When  God 
made  woman  she  was  man's  equal,  but  heathen- 
ism degraded  her,  and  the  religion  of  Jesus 
Christ  has  redeemed  her. 

WOMAN  HAS  IN  MOST  RESPECTS   AS    EASY   A  TIME 
AS  MAN  TODAY. 

Pomeroy  argues  that  the  wife  of  the  laborer 
is  on  a  par  with  her  husband.  She  washes  and 
bakes  and  sews  and  waits  upon  the  children 
from  morning  until  night  while  he  goes  to  the 
coal  mine,  or  street,  or  factory  with  his  tin  pail, 
eats  a  cold  dinner,  and  works  eight  or  ten  hours 
per  day.  Which  of  the  twain  have  it  the  hard- 
er? You  answer  she  is  a  slave  to  her  children; 
little  ones  to  the  true  mother  are  the  sweetest 
music  of  the  home,  and  the  dearest  joy  of  the 
heart.  Take  another  class,  the  skilled  laborer. 
He  does  not  work  as  hard  as  the  day  -laborer, 
and  often  superintends  men,  but  on  account  of 
his  better  wages  his  wife  keeps  a  servant  to  help 
her  bear  the  burdens  of  life.  Among  profes- 
sional men,  and  the  wealthy,  their  brains  are 
weary  with  the  great  responsibilities  they  carry 


woman's  rights  31 

while  their  wives  have  it  much  easier,  and  all 
the  help  that  is  necessary  to  aid  them  with  their 
work. 

WOMAN  IS  man's  equal  BUT  NOT  HIS  EQUIVALENT 

She  is  able  to  do  man's  work  in  the  office  and 
store,  and  in  literature,  and  in  the  pulpit,  and 
in  the  practice  of  law  and  medicine,  and  largely 
in  the  factories.  All  these  advantages  are  open 
to  her  and  ought  to  be,  and  she  ought  to  receive 
as  high  wages  as  man  in  every  calling  in  life 
where  she  does  the  same  amount  of  work.  Man 
is  woman's  equal.  He  can  bake  as  good  bread, 
and  wash  and  iron  as  well,  and  do  nearly  all  the 
work  that  a  woman  does.  The  question  is  no 
longer  debatable  whether  the  woman  is  man's 
equal  in  the  higher  education,  in  art  and  litera- 
ture and  in  music,  for  man  accords  to  her  all 
these  rights  and  advantages,  and  the  twentieth 
century  will  so  crown  her.  While  she  is  his 
equal  she  is  not  his  equivalent,  and  herein  is 
the  greatest  mistake  made  in  the  discussion  of 
this  question.  She  can  ride  horseback  like  a 
man,  and  be  a  cond  actor  on  a  train  and 
13erform  nearly  all  the  work  that  man  does,  but 
is  it  best  that  she  should  do  so,  and  cannot  she 
do  something  better? 

Not  from  his  head  he  woman  took, 
As  made  her  husband  to  o'er  look ; 
Not  from  his  feet  as  one  designed 


32 


MARRIAGE  AND   THE  HOME 


The  footstool  of  the  stronger  kind  ; 
But  fashioned  for  himself  a  bride  ; 
An  equal,  taken  from  his  side. 

— Charles  Wesley. 

She  is  not  a  supplement  to  man,  nor  an  ap- 
pendix, but  his  complement.  She  is  not  as  we 
often  read  in  the  cemeteries  a  relict  of  a  man. 
Man  and  woman  differ  from  each  other,  but  the 
unity  of  man  is  only  attained  in  both.  The 
blending  of  different,  and  yet  complemental 
colors  of  blue  and  orange,  green  and  red,  purple 
and  yellow  gives  us  the  unity  of  perfect  white- 
ness, so  man's  perfection  is  only  attained  unto 
in  the  blending  of  man  and  woman.  Oxygen 
is  not  water,  neither  is  hydrogen  but  both  to- 
gether give  us  the  life  giving  fluid.  The  two 
hemispheres  give  us  the  round  globe,  the  com- 
pleted world  and  so  with  man  and  woman.  She 
can  never  be  unsexed  and  be  the  equivalent  of 
man  neither  can  he  be  her  equivalent.  Board- 
man  says,  "there  is  only  one  thing  in  this  world 
feebler  than  a  womanized  man;  it  is  a  manized 
woman."  I  believe  in  a  real  boy,  and  a  real 
girl;  in  a  real  man,  and  a  real  woman  as  God 
made  them 

For  woman  is  not  an  undevelopt  man 
But  diverse:  Could  we  make  her  as  the  man, 
Sweet  love  were  slain:  his  dearest  bond  is  this 
Not  like  to  like,  but  like  in  difference. 


woman's  rights 


33 


Yet  ill  the  Ions:  vears  liker  must  they  grow  ; 
The  man  be  more  of  woman,  she  of  man  ; 
He  gain  in  sweetness  and  in  moral  height, 
Nor  ioose  the  wresting  thews  that  throw  the  world  ; 
Slie  mental  breadth,  nor  fail  in  childish  eare ; 
Nor  loose  the  childlike  in  the  larger  mind  ; 
Till  at  last  she  set  herself  to  man  ; 
Like  perfect  music  unto  noble  words; 
And  so  these  twain,  upon  I  he  skirts  of  Time, 
Sit  side  by  side  full  sum*d  in  all  their  powers. 
Dispensing  harvest,  sowing  the  To- be, 
Self  revert^nt  each,  and  reverencing  each. 
But  like  f'ach  other  ev'n  as  those  who  love 
Then  comes  the  statelier  Eden  back  to  man:  [calm 
Then  reigns  the  worlri's  great  bridals,  chaste  and 
Then  springs  the  crowning  race  of  human  kind, 
Ma}^  these  things  be.  — Tennyson. 

THE  NEW  WOMAN. 

I  think  that  God  designed  that  man  should 
be  the  bread  winner,  and  v^oman  the  bread  dis- 
tributor, and  hence  he  made  man  the  stronger 
physically.  Some  women  are  both,  but  this 
does  not  prove  that  God  so  designed  it.  The 
male  of  the  Americari  ostrich  sits  on  the  eggs 
and  hatches  them,  and  there  is  lately  discovered, 
a  species  of  spider  where  the  female  kills  her 
consort  and  feeds  upon  his  body,  but  this  does 
not  prove  that  man  should  do  the  house  work. 
Through  the  barbarism  of  man  woman  has  been 
forced  to  make  the  living  for  the  household. 
Maiden  ladies  in  the  future  shall  be  competitors 


34 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


with  men  in  photof^raphy,  art,  medicine,  educa- 
tion, law,  the  ministry  and  journalism.  She 
shall  stand  at  the  ballot  box  on  equal  footing 
with  man  and  say  who  shall  be  president  and 
mayor,  and  alderman  and  trustee  of  the  school. 
All  these  are  related  to  the  home  and  her  voice 
shall  be  heard.  She  shall  know  her  husband's 
business,  and  then  there  shall  be  less  fraud  in 
the  world.  She  has  a  right  to  know  all  about 
that  which  concerns  the  education  and  wealth 
and  happiness  of  her  home.  She  has  sutt'ered 
when  left  alone  for  want  of  business  knowledge. 
The  new  woman  will  have  a  better  physique. 
The  old  proverb  that  '^our  girls  must  either  be 
healthy  ignoramuses,  or  cultured  in V9 lids"  will 
be  unknown.  God  designed  that  a  woman 
should  be  able  to  climb  mountains  as  easily  as 
a  man.  Tlie  new  woman  will  not  be  a  doll,  and 
the  child  shall  supplant  the  piiff,  and  a  poodle 
dog  for  a  companion  will  only  be  known  on  the 
stage.  She  will  be  a  real  person  with  the 
world's  best  advantages  educationally,  socially, 
esthetically,  financially,  and  politically.  The 
home  is  the  mightiest  factor  in  the  salvation  of 
the  world.  I  appreciate  the  nun  who  secludes 
herself  from  the  world  to  advance  the  kingdom 
of  Jesus  Christ;  I  admire  the  maiden  lady  who 
leaves  home  and  native  land  and  all  the  luxuries 
of  civilization  to  carry  the  gospel  to  her  sister 


woman's  rights 


35 


in  heatlieiiism  and  redeem  her;  but  I  admire  the 
mother  more  than  any  other  class  for  her  sacri- 
fice, and  love  the  deepest  and  purest.  The  right 
of  maternity  shall  be  more  appreciated  by  the 
new  woman.  Ihave  heard  it  said  that  children 
are  a  hindrance  and  the  mother's  life  that  of  a 
slave's.  There  is  no  music  in  the  world  like 
the  cooing  of  a  babe.  The  songsters  of  the 
grove  charm  us,  sweet  singers  and  grand  an- 
thems inspire  us,  but  all  these  can  never  be 
compared  to  a  baby  solo  or  its  variety  concert. 
Catholics  and  Jews  appreciate  maternity  more 
than  Protestants.  Catholics  look  upon  mar- 
riage as  a  sacrament,  and  any  interference  with 
the  married  life  as  a  mortal  sin,  and  Jews  look 
upon  every  child  born  as  an  additional  proof  of 
God's  favor.  God  pity  the  man  who  has  no 
recollections  of  mother  and  home.  One  hun- 
dred and  twenty  clergymen  were  relating  their 
christian  experience  when  one  hundred  and  ten 
traced  their  christian  lives  to  pious  mothers. 
A  mother's  kiss  made  Benjamin  West  the  re- 
nowned artist,  a  painter.  Mrs.  Wesley,  the 
evangel  of  modern  times,  set  the  world  on  fire 
with  gospel  power  through  her  two  sons  Charles 
and  John.  Hannah  gave  the  world  her  most 
saintly  judge,'  Samuel.  I  heard  a  great  preacher 
say,  ''My  mother  took  me  by  the  hand  and  knelt 
with  me  in  prayer,  and  her  tears  fell  upon  the 


36 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


back  of  my  hand.  It  is  forty  years  since  V)ut 
I  can  feel  them  burning  today."  Children 
shall  be  considered  by  all  good  women  the  most 
fragrant  flowers  of  the  home,  and  the  heritage 
of  the  Lord.  No  childless  home  is  a  model  one. 
The  new  woman  shall  have  liberty  spelled  out 
in  capital  letters,  and  hers  shall  be  the  inherit- 
ance of  the  divine  command,  ^'Give  her  of  the 
fruit  of  her  hands,  and  let  her  own  works  praise 
her  within  the  gates .    She  shall  be, 

A  woman  in  so  far  as  she  beholdeth 

Her  one  Beloved's  face ; 
A  mother  with  a  great  heart  that  enfoldetb 

The  children  of  her  race. 
A  body  free  and  strong,  with  that  bigh  beauty 

That  comes  of  perfect  use,  is  built  thereof  ; 
A  mind  where  reason  ruleth  over  duty, 

And  justice  reigns  with  love; 
A  self-poised  royal  soul,  brave,  wise  ani  tender 

No  longer  blind  and  dumb; 
A  human  being  of  an  unknown  splendor, 

Is  she  who  is  to  come." 


37 


Is  Man  Too  Prolific? 

"And  Grod  blessed  them,  and  God  said  unto 
them  be  fraitful  and  multiply,  and  replenish 
the  earth,  and  subdue  it:  and  have  dominion 
over  the  fish  of  the  sea,  and  over  the  fowl  of 
the  air;  and  over  every  living  thing  that  moveth 
upon  the  earth." 

A  man  is  the  whole  encyclopedia  of  facts. 
The  creation  of  a  thousand  forests  is  in  an 
acorn,  and  E^ypt,  Greece,  Rome,  Gaul,  Britain, 
America  lie  folded  already  in  the  first  man. — 
Emeison. 

There  are  many  who  believe  that  the  wo;'ld  is 
being  over  populated,  and  that  we  cannot  sup- 
ply work  and  food  to  meet  the  necessities  of 
life.  Plato  and  Aristotle,  and  in  more  modern 
times,  Hume,  Benjamin  Franklin,  Wallace, 
Townsend,  Malthus  and  Mills  have  all  treated 
to  some  extent  the  question  of  over  population. 

THE  MALTHUSIAN  DOCTRINE. 

Malthus  and  John  Stuart  Mill  thought  that 
the  population  unchecked  would  double  in 
about  every  t^Tenty-five  years.  Emigration  has 
been  looked  upon  as  the  great  means  to  relieve 
the  situation,  but  this  is  only  a  delaying  of' the 


88 


MARRIAGE  AND   THE  HOME 


problem.  Otliers  have  thought  that  war  was  a 
necessity  to  reduce  the  populatiori,  but  tin's  is 
cruel  and  not  in  harmony  with  the  mercy  and 
wisdom  of  God.  Malthus  taught  that  life  on 
this  planet  is  so  prolific  that  if  unchecked  it 
would  fill  millions  of  worlds  in  a  few  thousand 
years,  and  he  adds  there  are  only  three  checks 
to  restrain  or  prevent  it;  moral  restraint,  vice 
and  misery.  He  approved  only  of  the  one  re- 
straint, the  moral  one,  ''Don't  marry  till  you 
have  a  fair  prospect  of  supporting  a  family." 
This  check  teaches  two  grand  lessons;  the  re- 
sponsibility of  parenthood,  and  the  bringing 
children  into  the  world  without  being  able  to 
care  for  them.  He  also  thought  that  one  or  two 
children  were  sufficient,  and  Pomeroy  says  on 
this  basis  man  would  be  an  extinct  animal  in 
500  years. 

THE  EARTH  WILL  NEVER  BE  OVER  POPULATED. 

It  has  taken  the  world  several  hundred  years 
to  double  its  population  up  to  date,  instead  of 
every  twenty-five  years.  Mr.  Grant  Allen  made 
an  estimate  in  1889  on  the  number  of  children 
necessary  in  the  family  to  keep  the  world  with 
its  present  population.  He  took  into  account 
those  who  do  not  marry,  and  unavoidable  bar- 
renness among  the  married  and  he  placed  the 
estimate  at  four  children  in  every  home,  and 
Pomeroy  made  a  careful  estimate  and  he  placed 


IS  MAN  TOO  PROLIFIC? 


39 


the  number  of  children  at  four  also.  W.  C. 
Prime  said  in  1889  that  the  state  of  Texas  would 
furnish  room  for  a  separate  i2:rave  for  every  hu- 
man being  born  in  the  last  six  thousand  years, 
and  all  who  will  be  born  in  six  thousand  years 
to  come.  Every  man  woman  and  child  in  the 
world  could  stand  side  by  side  today  in  a  plot 
of  ground  ten  miles  square.  God  has  shown 
his  Omniscience  in  giving  every  order  of  species 
its  basis  of  reproduction.  The  lower  orders  are 
a  thousand  fold  more  prolific  than  the  higher 
orders.  Among  the  low^er  they  live  upon  each 
other,  hence  thei'e  is  no  danger  of  over  popula- 
tion. Pishes,  insects  and  small  animals  increase 
much  more  rapidly  than  lions,  elephants  and 
man.  The  giant  oak  never  produces  beyond  its 
best  condition  for  growth  while  a  thistle  seed 
would  stock  a  continent.  The  Creator  never 
made  the  elephant  to  multiply  like  the  smaller 
animals,  and  if  he  had  the  animal  .world  would 
have  been  lop-sided  w4th  elephants;  for,  from 
their  size,  and  strength  and  age  to  which  they 
live  they  would  have  had  the  right  of  way  on 
this  earth.  The  elephant  lives  for  a  hundred 
years,  and  if  the  Creator  had  made  him  to  mul- 
tiply like  some  tiny  insects  which  only  live  a  few 
sunshinny  days  the  earth  would  be  the  abode 
of  elephants,  and  if  the  tiny  insect  was  no  more 
prolific  than  the  elephant  and  lived  such  a  short 


40 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


period  most  of  the  insect  species  would  V^e  ex- 
tinct. The  Omnipotent  made  man  and  all  othei' 
species,  and  prepared  the  earth  for  them,  and 
adapted  them  all  so  well  to  each  other  that  a 
million  years  would  never  prove  that  God  failed 
in  the  creation  of  the  world. 

THIS  WORLD  CAN  NEVER  WEAR  OUT. 

Some  teach  that  it  will  becomiC  so  impover- 
ished that  it  will  fail  to  yield  its  accustomed  in- 
crease. Parts  of  New  England  apparently  bear 
out  this  theory,  but  lack  of  science  and  wisdom 
on  the  part  of  man  has  been  the  cause.  The 
worn-out  farms  of  New  England  under  applied 
science  shall  '^blossom  as  the  rose."  There,  is 
nothing  lost  or  annihilated  on  this  earth.  The 
food  we  eat,  the  coal  we  burn  all  goes  to  aid 
some  other  part.  The  mineral  and  vegetable 
and  animal  kingdoms  are  borrowing  and  lend- 
ing; the  Sun  and  earth  have  free  trade  between 
them  and  nothing  is  lost.  God  did  not  make 
this  earth  as  a  huge  granary,  or  storehouse  into 
which  man  was  to  go  until  all  was  consumed 
and  then  die.  Such  a  world  would  be  a  tre- 
mendous failure.  He  made  it  a  self  supporting 
world.  The  rocks  are  continually  turning  into 
valuable  soil,  and  the  sun  and  air  are  enriching 
the  earth.  It  is  said  that  a  single  year  adds 
500  tons  of  Cosmic  dust  from  other  worlds  to 
the  earth.    We  might  as  reasonably  believe  that 


IS  MAN   TOO  PROLIFIC? 


41 


in  time  tlie  air  would  become  so  impure  from 
our  great  cities,  and  sluggish  rivers,  and  decay- 
ing forests,  and  from  the  worlds  of  bird  and 
beast  and  man  that  eventually  it  would  become 
impossible  to  live  on  this  planet  and  hence  the 
race  would  be  extinct.  God  made  this  a  self 
purifying  world,  and  as  man  subdues  it,  it  will 
become  a  vast  sanitarium,  and  smoke  and  all 
impurities  will  be  cremated,  and  the  diseases  of 
the  world  shall  be  subdued,  and  men  shall  be 
in  business  at  one  hundred  years  of  age. 

CAUSES  OF  SCARCITY. 

It  is  not  from  over  population.  Our  cities 
are  over  crowded  today.  New  Yoik  and  Lon- 
don and  many  other  great  cities  have  more  men 
than  they  can  fur»iisli  work  for.  Many  of  these 
are  unfitted  for  any  kitid  of  work,  We  are  not 
eqnally  distributed;  the  great  rich  southland  is 
a  very  Eden  in  climate,  and  a  garden  in  fertil- 
ity, and  is  largely  a  desert :  much  of  the  great 
West  is  a  barren  waste.  General  Booth's 
scheme  for  transferring  the  poor  in  ihe  cities 
to  the  country  where  they  may  all  liave  plenty, 
is  feasable.  In  our  own  country  colonization 
companies  are  springing  up  already  as  a  medium 
through  which  millions  may  tind  pure,  sweet 
homes  with  plenty.  This  will  reduce  the  pop- 
ulation in  cities  and  lessen  povt  rty  and  crime 
and  increase  the  virtue  and  wealih  of  the  nation. 


42 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


We  spend  every  year  one  billion  five  hundred 
millions  for  liquor  and  tobacco;  an  averp.2;e  of 
twenty-five  dollars  per  capita.  Human  greed 
has  2^round  the  masses  down  to  poverty  and 
crime  It  is  the  abuse  of  the  earth  and  not  its 
use  that  has  given  us  famine  and  poverty  and 
crime.  The  gospel  will  literally  make  this  earth 
blossom  as  the  rose.  There  shall  come  u'nifvorm 
marriage  and  divorce  laws  in  all  the  states  of 
the  Union,  and  the  unfit  mentally,  physically 
and  socially  shall  be  debarred  from  matrimony. 
It  might  look  as  if  such  an  action  on  the  part 
of  the  state  were  interfering  with  human  liber- 
ty, but  she  has  a  right  to  protect  herself.  No 
shiftless  man  has  a  right  to  bring  children  into 
the  world  and  impose  them  on  society.  Society 
has  a  right  to  say  that  criminals  and  paupers 
shall  not  be  born.  It  is  a  libel  on  the  mercy 
and  wisdom  of  God  to  say  that  this,  world  will 
prove  a  failure,  and  that  war  and  famine  are 
necessary  to  j^reserve  the  balance  of  power,  and 
make  room  for  man. 

THE  SUPPLY  IS  ILLIMITABLE. 

Not  over  one-tenth  of  this  world  is  worked, 
and  that  one-tenth  will  yet  yield  ten  times  .as 
much.  The  time  will  come  when  forty  acres 
will  be  considered  a  large  farm,  and  yield  more 
than  one  hundred  and  sixty  now.  Man  is  the 
mightiest  factor  in  the  progress  of   this  world. 


IS  MAN  TOO  PEOLIFIC? 


48 


We  have  nature's  storehouse  well  filled  with  fish 
and  game,  and  wild  fruit,  and  wood  and  coal, 
and  if  this  were  all,  the  world  would  soon  be 
over  crowded.  Add  man  and  it  is  said  he  mul- 
tiplies the  earth's  capacity  by  fifteen  hundred. 
Pomeroy  looks  on  the  earth,  not  as  a  vast  store- 
house but  as  a  great  machine,  or  factory  run 
by  man  and  adequate  to  meet  the  demands  of 
all  the  ages.  .  A  whole  state  will  yet  be  turned 
into  a  hot  house  with  glass  and  steam;  winter 
will  be  annihilated,  and  the  producing  capacity 
be  increased  one  hundred  per  cent.  The  mill- 
ions of  acres  of  arid  wastes  will  be  irrigated, 
and  man  will  be  lord  of  the  water  supplies  and 
demands  of  this  earth.  Famines  will  be  un- 
known in  the  future;  the  means  of  transporta- 
tion will  be  such  that  the  whole  world  will  be- 
come a  neighborhood.  The  winds  and  electric- 
ity and  the  great  oceans  and  mighty  rivers  will 
give  power  enough  to  turn  the  wheels  of  the 
world's  machinery  for  ail  time  to  come.  The 
supply  is  illimitable.  There  will  always  be  air 
enough,  and  light  enough,  and  heat  enough 
while  the  sun  endures.  We  have  harnessed 
steam  and  it  moves  the  world;  we  have  made 
the  lightning  our  errand  boy,  harnessed  elec- 
tricity partially  but  we  are-  only  in  our  infancy; 
we  shall  harness  the  sun's  rays  some  day,  and 
already  one  coach  has  been  propelled  by  them, 


44 


xMARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


and  when  we  couple  the  earth  to  the  lieat  of  the 
sun,  and  to  his  power,  and  to  his  li^j^ht  there  can 
be  no  failure,  and  when  the  mighty  oceans  roll 
up  against  the  machinery  of  this  earth  it  will 
move  grandly  and  tremendously  on  forever. 
God  blessed  man,  and  told  him  he  was  lord  of 
all  his  creation,  and  to  multiply  and  replen.ish 
the  earth,  and  subdue  it;  harness  down  the  ?nn 
to  meet  your  wants,  control  the  oceans  and 
then  shall  the  earth  yield  a  thousand  fold.  We 
have  gone  down  into  the  earth,  and  we  have 
found  gas  and  coal  and  iron  and  ^old  and  sil- 
ver, and  platinum,  and  these  great  discoveries 
have  given  to  us  a  new  earth  and  the  former 
earth  hath  passed  away.  I  don't  know  what 
Grod  has  in  reserve  for  this  world  yet.  Man 
shall  subdue  the  laws  of  nature  and  explore  her 
secrets,  and  invention  and  discovery  shall  give 
us  another  new  earth,  and  there  shall  be  no 
scarcity  for  the  record  tells  us  that,  'Hhe  earth 
is  the  Lord's  and  the  fullness  thereof,"  and 
'^seed  time  and  harvest"  shall  continue  while 
the  world  lasts.  A  German  scientist  says  that 
applied  science  will  be  able  to  provide  for  as 
many  human  beings  as  would  occupy  this  earth 
were  it  one  vast  city.  It  will  take  millions  of 
years  to  learn  the  goodness  and  wisdom  of  God 
in  furnishing  this  earth  for  man,  and  a  new 
doxology  of  praise  will  leap  from  the  hearts  of 


IS  MAN  TOO  PROLIFIC? 


45 


the  race  as  it  shall  subdue  the  earth,  and  with 
enlar^^ed  capacity  be  able  to  appreciate  the 
wealth  of  his  Providence  for  the  children  of 
men.  Henry  Clay,  the  ideal  statesman  of 
America,  climbed  a  crag  of  the  AUec^hanies  in 
company  with  a  friend.  The  valley  of  the  Ohio 
was  stretched  out  before  him  and  he  was  sitting 
with  his  head  bowed  with  listening  intent  when 
his  friend  asked,  "What  hearest  thou  senator 
from  Kentucky?"  "Hear?"  replied  the  states- 
man, "I  hear  the  thundering  tread  of  the  com- 
ing millions  who  are  marcliing  over  the  mount- 
ains to  possess  those  prairies,  away  and  away  to 
the  setting  sun."  That  was  as  true  a  prophecy 
as  if  recorded  in  the  book  of  holy  writ.  The 
prophet  is  yet  to  be  born  who  can  lift  this  world 
out  of  the  unrevealed  providence  of  God  as  it 
shall  blaze  with  His  glory  in  the  ages  to  come. 
"Great  and  marvellous  are  thy  works  Lord  God 
Almighty,  heaven  and  earth  are  full  of  thy 
glory." 


46  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


The  Selection  oe  a.  Wife, 

Take  the  daughter  of  a  2:ood  mother. — Fuller. 
If  thou  wouldst  marry  wise,  marrj"  thine  equal. 
—Ovid. 

Whoso  findeth  a  wife  findeth  a  good  thing,  and 
obtaineth  favor  of  the  Lord. -^Solomon. 

In  the  election  of  a  wife,  as  in 

A  project  of  war,  to  err  but  once  is 

To  be  undone  forever.  — Middieton. 

Is  there  never  a  woman  among  the  daughters  of 
thj  brethren,  or  among  all  the  people,  that  thou 
goest  to  take  a  wife  of  the  uncircumsized  Philis- 
tines ? — 'Judges. 

The  reason  whv  so  few  marriages  are  happy  is 
because  young  ladies  spend  their  time  in  making 
nets,  not  in  making  cages. — Swift. 

This  is  a  grave  subject  and  one  vi^iich  the 
christian  pulpit  lias  been  shy  of,  and  which  has 
been  rele^^ated  to  the  domain  of  the  sensational 
novel  and  the  stage.  The  very  mention  of  such 
a  theme  begets  prejudice  in  the  minds  of  many, 
and  brings  associations  that  are  flippant;  ro- 
mances quite  unworthy  the  attention  of  men  of 
brain  and  character.    If   there   is   one  place 


THE  SELECT  ION  OF  A  WIFE 


47 


amontj:  all  others  where  the  youn^  man  has  a 
decided  advantaL^e  over  the  youn^:  woman,  it  is 
in  the  selection  of  a  companion  for  life.  This 
advantage  arises  fi'om  the  fact  that  he  has  more 
ahnndant  and  "better  material  to  select  from,  and 
not  because  his  jud<^ement  is  any  better.  The 
avera<j:e  yonn^-  woman  'is  purer  and  stron^*er 
mentally  than  the  average  youn£<  man,  and 
should  the  best  fifty  youn^:  men  of  any  churcli 
I  ha^e  ever  served  marry  the  best  fifty  youns: 
women,  the  youns^  men  would  have  the  best  of 
it  by  all  odds. 

MEN  DO  NOT  ALWAYS  CHOOSE  WISELY. 

Many  men  whose  opinion  and  judgement  is 
sought  and  acted  on  m  law,  and  medicine,  and 
business,  and  mechanics,  and  theology,  and  in 
all  the  affairs  of  life,  when  it  comes  to  the  se- 
lection of  a  wife  make  the  choice  apparently 
without  judgement.  It  is  passing  strange  that 
brain,  and  social  advantage,  and  scholarship, 
should  all  go  for  naught  upon  such  an  import- 
ant event.  A  painter  was  mixiiig  paints  with 
divers  colors  when  an  onlooker  asked  him  what 
he  was  mixing  the  paints  with,  ''with  brains. 
Sir,"  was  the  terse  and  laconic  reply.  It  takes 
brains  to  choose  a  wife.  It  is  one  of  the  most' 
important  steps  in  life,  and  alas  for  many  a  home 
and  the  world  it  is  a  brainless  one.  I  can  con- 
vince you  from  the   many  great   failures  that 


48 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


have  been  made  by  men  of  wealth  of  character 
and  brain  fibre  that  the  most  foolish  selections 
have  been  made.  Samson  went  contrary  to 
the  wishes  of  his  parents  and  married  a  daugh- 
ter of  the  Philistines,  and  she  deceived  and  be- 
trayed him,  and  through  his  crue!  and  heartless 
wife  he  lost  his  strength,  eyes  and  life.  When 
he  propounded  a  riddle,  and  his  wife  turned 
traitor,  I  am  not  surprised  that  he  said  in  that 
crude  asre,  ''If  ye  had  not  plowed  with  my  heifer, 
ye  had  not  found  out  my  riddle."  It  is  strange 
that  a  man  with  his  ability  should  leave  the 
land  of  beautiful  Miriam  and  lovely  Esther  and 
select  such  a  woman  for  a  wife.  Job  was  ''a 
perfect  and  an  upright  man,''  and  had  the  abil- 
ity to  make  money,  and  outmatch  Satan  and  all 
his  enemies,  and  yet  he  selected  a  cruel  and 
heartless  noneutity  for  a  wife.  If  there  ever 
was  a  time  when  a  husband  needed  the  conso- 
lations of  a  truly  sympathetic  wife  it  was  \n 
Job's  case,  when  all  his  children  were  dead, 
and  his  property  was  all  destroyed,  and  all  his 
friends  had  forsaken  him,  and  he  was  afflicted 
with  boils,  and  yet  his  wife  told  him  "to  curse 
God  and  die."  He  made  a  more  gentle  reply 
than  some  Americans  would  have  made  under 
the  circumstances.  He  said,  ''You  talk  as  one 
of  the  foolish  women."  John  Wesley  the  ripe 
scholar,    and   great    organizer,   and  mighty 


THE  SELECTION  OF  A  WIFE 


49 


preacher  ch(jBe  a  woman  for  a  wife  that  was  a 
tHntaliz-^r  and  jealous.  Socrates  the  great  phi- 
i().-^'>pher  chose  Xatitippe,  and  she  kept  him  on 
the  race  track  all  his  life.  This  world  has  seen 
but  one  Shakespeare  and  his  married  life  was 
unbearable  and  a  failure.  A  friend  referred  to 
John  Milton's  wife  as  a  rose,  and  the  blind  poet 
replied,  ^'I  am  no  judge  of  colors,  but  it  may  be 
so  for  I  feel  the  thorns  daily."  Byron,  and 
Ruskin  and  Macbeth  awd  Robinson  and  thous- 
ands of  others;  men  who  were  philosophers, 
judges,  artists,  poets,  ministers;  men  of  brain 
and  ripe  scholarship  have  been  yoked  with  Jez- 
ebels and  Xantippes  and  Mrs.  John  Wesley's 
for  life. 

LITTLE  EXCUSE  FOR  SUCH  MISTAKES  TODAY. 

There  never  was  so  much  good  wife  material 
in  all  this  world  as  today.  The  young  women 
of  our  land  were  never  so  well  educated,  never 
so  true  to  Christianity  and  the  cause  of  Jesus 
Christ,  never  more  heroic  and  self  sacrificing 
than  at  present,  and  physically,  mentally  and 
morally  they  stand  at  the  head  of  womankind 
from  the  days  of  Eve  until  now.  Talmage  says, 
"The  world  never  owned  such  opulence  of  wom- 
anly character,  or  such  splendor  of  womanly 
manners,  or  such  multitudinous  instances  of 
wifely,  motherly,  daughterly,  sisterly  devotion 
as  it  owns  today.    I  have  not  words  to  express 


50 


MAKRIAGE  AND   THE  HOME 


my  admiration  for  good  womanhood.  Woman 
is  not  only  man's  equal,  but  in  affectional  and, 
emotional  nature,  which  is  the  best  part  of  us 
she  is  seventy-five  per  cent  his  superior." 
There  never  were  so  many  devout  Marys  to  se- 
lect from,  never  so  many  loyal  Ruths,  and  in- 
dustrious Marthas,  and  glorious  Deborahs, 
Evangelines,  and  Martha  Washingtons,  and 
Florence  Nightingales,  and  Cornelias;  never  so 
many  home-lovers  and  home-makers  in  all  this 
world  as  today. 

SOME  TRAITS  OF  CHARACTER  TO  SHUN. 

There  are  women  and  women.  While  you 
have  such  a  galaxy  of  glori')as  women  to  select 
from,  you  have  also  thousands  of  shams  and 
counterfeit  women,  th  :)usands  of  shoddy  and 
parrotlike  women— mere  imitators  of  woman- 
hood. Solomon  said,  ''It  is  better  to  dwell  in 
the  corner  of  the  house-top  than  with  a  brawl- 
ing woman  in  a  wide  house."  Better  live  in 
the  garret  among  the  cobwebs  and  broken  and 
castaway  furniture,  than  with  a  woman  with  a 
bad  temper.  If  any  man  can  live  with  a  con- 
tentious, sulky,  disputing  woman  in  this  life  he 
ought  to  have  some  kind  consideration  in  the 
hereafter.  Think  of  a  man  perplexed  with  bus- 
iness, and  weary  with  the  labors  of  the  day  com- 
ing home  to  a  social  cyclone:  such  a  woman  is 
driving  nails  in  her  husband's  coffin  every  day. 


THE  SELECTION  OF  A  WIFE  51 

and  I'm  not  surprised  that  he  spends  his  eve- 
niiicrs  away  from  home.  Unless  you  are  a  phi- 
losopher like  Socrates  don't  marry  a  brawling 
woman.  Don't  marry  a  fashion  plate,  a  painted 
butterfly,  a  bundle  of  artificialities,  or  she  will 
sacrifice  home  to  the  watering  place,  and  the 
dinner  to  the  ball,  and  you  will  repent  at  leisure 
because  you  married  a  giggling  nothing  for  a 
substantial  something.  Don't  marry  a  flirt; 
they  are  all  triflers,  vanity  fairs,  and  love  to 
have  many  beaux;  they  are  all  surface  women, 
taking  more'pains  with  the  outside  of  the  head 
than  with  the  inside,  and  if  they  are  untrue  as 
young  women  they  will  be  as  wives.  Many  are 
attracted  only  by  the  plumage  and  the  gaiety 
of  fashion,  and  in  after  years  find  out  to  their 
sorrow  that  they  have  been  swindled  out  of  ev- 
erything they  bargained  for  but  the  advertise- 
ment. Don't  marry  a  mere  beauty.  **Favor  is 
deceitful,  and  beauty  is  vain:  but  a  woman  that 
feareth  the  Lord  she  shall  be  praised."  How 
many  foolish  young  men  choose  surface  beauty 
instead  of  beauty  of  morals  and  mind.  A  mere 
surface  beauty  will  vanish  with  the  flight  of 
years,  and  is  to  the  real  character  what  paint  is 
to  the  building.  It  cannot  be  reckoned  among 
the  wearables  and  substantials  of  life. 

*'For  rarely  do  we  meet  in  one  combined, 
A  beauteous  body  and  a  virtuous  mind/' 


52 


MAREIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


When  God  ogives  personal  beauty  it  is  not  for 
butterfly  life,  and  raaity,  but  for  nKikiriK  the 
life  of  virtue  all  the  more  attractive*"  and  divine. 

LET  ME  GIVE  YOU  TWO  PICTURES. 

I  have  seen  some  charming  f  u-es  with  every 
feature  so  symmetrical  and  lovely  that  they  al- 
most answered  to  my  ideal  of  beauty  until  they 
opened  their  mouths  and  began  to  talk,  and  give 
exhibitions  of  their  character,  and  then  it  all 
vanished.  The  exterior  prophesied  falsely  of 
the  interior,  and  it  became  to  me  an  empty 
mind  and  a  veneered  character  shin^in^  through 
a  vacant  face,  and  I  thou^^iit  of  the  piece  we 
sometimes  sing  entitie.l,  "The  Vacant  Lot  "  I 
have  seen  another  picture;  it  was  when  the  con- 
tour of  the  face  and  form  were  ungainly  and 
ungraceful,  and  yet  when  the  man  or  woman 
began  to  speak,  and  the  true  nobility  of  charac- 
ter impressed  itself  tlien  the  mind  and  spirit 
set  the  human  vase  ablaze  with  intellectual  and 
spiritual  light  and  glory  and  I  was  attracted 
and  overawed  by  the  beauty  and  grandeur  of 
the  magnificent  presence.  B  ^luty  of  face  won't 
win  in  the  school  room,  and  in  the  store,  and 
in  life  and  the  home;  it  is  nobility  of  character 
that  is  always  mighty  and  coavincing. 

SOME  GOOD  ADVICE. 

I  desire  as  your  spiritual  adviser  to  give  you 
somegood  advice.    The  most  of  you   will  em- 


THE  SELECTION  OF  A  WIFE  53 


bark  some  day  on  the  sea  of  matrimony,  and 
there  are  such  tempestuous  seas,  such  danger- 
ous euroclydous  that  T  have  warned  you,  and 
now  T  desire  to  direct  you  to  a  sea  of  bluest 
skies,  and  crispest  air,  and  serenest  joys  and 
matrimonial  bliss  from  the  day  you  set  sail  from 
the  weildino^  altar  until  you  shall  be  anchored 
m  "the  haven  of  rest."  Marry  a  young  woman 
of  good  constitution.  Many  men  are  handi- 
capped aU  their  lives  with  broken  homes,  and 
poverty  and  doctor's  bills  because  they  married 
women  who  were  incapable  of  assuming  the  re- 
sponsibilities of  the  married  life.  Marry  a  sen- 
sible young  woman.  The  romance  of  courtship 
and  the  honeymoon  will  soon  wear  off,  and  then 
comes  the  realities  of  life,  and  good  judgement 
will  be  a  benediction  to  your  home  every  day 
you  live.  Such  a  youii^r  woman  will  never  be  a 
spendthrift.  She  will  not  be  jealous  or  sensi- 
tive if  your  income  does  not  enable  her  to  ap- 
pear in  society  in  as  costly  wardrobe  as  her 
neighbors.  If  misfortune  should  overtake  you 
she  will  say,  "Well  husband  there  are  a  thous- 
and things  worse  than  this,  we  will  not  be  dis- 
couraged but  begin  if  need  be  at  the  bottom 
again."  She  will  be  a  frugal  companion  and 
that  enhances  future  comforts.  Such  a  woman 
will  never  be  a  gossiper,  and  when  a  little  air  on 
some  human  tongue  sets  a  neighborhood  in  so- 


54 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


cial  commotion  she  will  be  strong  and  sensible 
amidst  it  all,  and  her  husband  will  have  reason 
to  call  her  blessed.    Marry  a  youn^  lady  who  is 
well  born,  well  brought  up,  and  who  has  a  good 
mother.    Show  me  a  young  woman  and   T  can 
almost  tell  you  the  kind  of  a  mother   she  has 
without  having  met  her.    Henry  Ward  Beecher 
said.  "Select  good  parents  to  be  born  from,  and 
take  good  care  of  yourself  afterwards."  Marry 
for  personal  value,  and  not  for  real  estate  for 
the  character  is  everything.    You   can  study 
character  in  the  office,  and  in  the  church,  and 
in  the  home  and  the  faithful   in  these  places 
will  be  the  faithful  as  wives,   and  stability  of 
character  makes  homes   blessed    and  abiding. 
Marry  the  pure  and  chaste.    God  never  made 
anything  quite  so  lovely  as  a  pure  woman,  and 
there  is  nothing  quite  so  nasty  as   an  impure 
one.    Pass  by  the  slovenly  girl,  for  no  untidy 
woman  can  command  the  respect  of  a  true  hus- 
band.   Pass  by  the  boisterous  laughter  on  the 
streets,  and  the  loud  and   coarse   talker,  and 
those  who  smile  at  impure  anecdotes,  and  the 
unchaste  in  thought  and  word,  and  all  who  keep 
unquestionable  company,  an  d  all  who  are  never 
at  home  but  when  they  are  away  from  home 
Marry  the  faithful,  the  pure  and  high-minded; 
"Who  can  find  a  virtuous  woman  for  her  price 
is  far  above  rubies." 


THE  SELECTION  OF  A  WIFE 


55 


''Virtue  alone  outbuilds  the  Pyramids; 
Her  monuments  shall  last,  when  Egypt's  fall.'* 

— Young. 

God  made  a  woman  for  Adam,  and  he  has 
made  one  for  you,  and  if  you  would  be  sure  of 
the  right  one  go  in  devout  counsel  and  ask 
her  Maker,  and  he  will  grant  thee  wisdom,  and 
^'thou  shalt  obtain  favor  of  the  Lord," 


*56 


MAERIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


The  Choice  of  a  Husband, 

The  Lord  grant  you  that  ye  may  find  rest,  each 
of  you  in  the  house  of  her  husband. — Naomi. 

I  would  bestow  my  daughter  said  Themistocles, 
"upon  a  man  without  money  rather  than  upon 
money  without  a  man." — Percy. 

When  lovely  woman  stoops, 
And  finds  too  late  that  men  betray, 
What  charms  can  soothe  her  melancholy, 
What  art  can  wash  her  guilt  away  ?" 

— Goldsmith. 

As  the  husband  is  the  wife  is ; 
Thou  art  mated  to  a  clown, 
The  grossness  of  his  nature, 
Will  have  weight  to  drag  you  down. 

— Tennyson. 

**Be  joined  to  thine  equal  in  rank,  or  the 
foot  of  pride  will  kick  at  thee ; 

And  look  not  only  for  riches,  lest  thou  be 
mated  with  misery." 

Last  Sunday  evening  I  gave  some  good  ad- 
vice to  young  men  in  selecting  companions  for 
life,  and  now  young  ladies  I  counsel  you  to 
open  your  eyes,  and  use  your  best  judgement 
for  you  have  greater  risks  to   take  than  young 


THE  CHOICE  OF  A  HUSBAND 


57 


men  have,  ancl  a  mistake  on  yonr  part  is  fatal 
for  life.  If  you  are  true  to  your  parents  you 
will  never  marry  without  counseling  them,  and 
if  you  are  trae  to  God  you  will  ask  for  wisdom 
from  on  high  to  guide  you  aright.  In  marriage 
you  are  making ''A  world- without-end-bargain," 
and  your  parents  who  have  nursed  you  from 
childhood,  and  idolized  you,  love  you  dearer 
than  anybody  else  in  all  this  world.  Alas,  many 
young  ladies  turn  a  deaf  ear  to  the  entreaties 
of  their  parents,  and  act  blindly  on  the  impulses 
of  their  nature,  and  I  can  only  forgive  them  on 
the  ground  of  thoughtlessness. 

THERE  ARE  LEGIONS  OF  GOOD  MEN. 

It  is  a  common  remark  among  young  ladies, 
"I  have  no  confidence  in  the  men."  I  am  not 
surprised  that  some  women  loose  faith  in  the 
men  because  among  their  acquaintances  they 
have  seen  so  many  counterfeit  and  villainous 
imitations.  The  counterfeit  coin  never  argues 
that  all  money  is  bad,  but  that  there  is  the  real 
genuine  coin  and  so  with  men.  This  world 
never  had  so  many  good  men  as  today;  it  never 
saw  such  glory  of  manho  )d,  such  true  fidelity 
to  the  home,  such  ^^racious  liberality  and  tender 
care  of  woman.  Stand  in  the  great  thorough- 
fares of  any  large  city  between  six  and  seven 
o'clock  in  the  morning,  and  look  at  the  great 
armies  of  men  with  coarse  clothing  and  shoes, 


58  MAKRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


and  hard  hands,  and  bony  and  sinewy  frames 
going  with  their  cold  hmcheons  to  the  factories, 
and  mines  and  shops  for  the  labors  of  the  day 
look  again  at  that  army  with  perspiration  bead- 
ing their  brows,  and  bearing  bardens  that  would 
try  nerves  of  steel  and  constitutions  of  iron,  and 
without  a  murmur  they  toil  on  with  a  doxology 
in  their  hearts  because  they  have  steady  em- 
ployment, and  an  opportunity  to  earn  bread  for 
the  families.  Many  working  men  die  at  forty 
and  fifty  years  of  age,  and  if  the  true  inscrip- 
tion were  cut  on  their  tomb  stones  it  would  read, 
'forked  to  death."  Go  into  the  home  at  mid- 
night where  the  little  one  is  burning  up  with 
fever,  and  there  you  will  find  the  father  by  the 
cot  all  night  long  as  true  and  devoted  to  that 
little  life  as  its  guardian  angel  firom  heaven. 
Let  me  give  you  another  picture.  Let  the  leper 
or  the  criminal  assault  that  home,  and  I  will 
show  you  a  sight  that  the  very  angels  around 
the  throne  admire.  The  husband  with  his  life 
in  his  hand  is  on  the  threshold  at  the  least 
alarm,  and  in  defence  of  his  wife  and  daughter 
faces  the  cruel  knife  and  fiendish  revolver,  and 
even  the  tortuous  flames  if  need  be  and  dies  a 
martyr  without  a  thought  of  his  own  danger. 
There  never  were  so  many  young  men  in  our 
colleges  ready  to  give  up  the  luxuries  of  ih.% 
best  civilization   for   the   redemption   of  the 


THE  CHOICE  OF  A  HUSBAND 


59 


*  heathen  as  today,  there  never  were  so  many  who 
were  ready  to  die  for  home  and  country  as  at 
present  if  the  occasion  required  it.  I  do  not 
say  that  all  these  men  are  immaculate,  and  spot- 
less, and  perfect,  but  they  are  brave,  and  splen- 
did men.  I  have  often  seen  the  wives  in  holi- 
day apparel  ^oing  on  their  vacation  while  their 
husbands  were  the  very  slaves  of  the  home. 
While  you  may  lack  confidence  in  many  men 
give  full  credit  to  the  pure  and  honorable,  and 
remember  you  have  a  husband,  or  father,  or 
brother,  or  son,  and  many  of  these  are  martyrs 
to  a  life  of  drudgery  for  your  comfort. 

SOME  OF  YOU  WILL  NEVEK  MARRY. 

It  is  right  that  some  should  remain  single, 
and  it  would  have  been  infinitely  better  if  many 
others  never  had  married.  You  can  do  better 
than  marry  an  imbecile,  an  incapable,  or  drunk- 
en sot.  Many  ladies  have  rejected  unworthy 
suitors  and  led  lives  that  were  a  paradise  as 
compared  with  their  married  sisters.  A  thous- 
and'fold  better  be  the  beautiful  Miriam,  the  re- 
deemer of  her  little  brother,  or  Mary  sitting  at 
the  feet  of  Jesus,  or  a  Catherine  E.  Beecher, 
the  apostle  of  female  education,  or  a  Frances  E. 
Willard,  the  uncrowned  temperance  queen,  or 
a  Florence  Nightingale  the  heroine  of  the  Cri- 
mea, or  a  Clara  Burton  of  precious  memory  for 
her  charity  during  the  late  war,  or  a  Margaret 


60 


MARKIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


Breckenridge  at  Vicksburo:,  or  a  mniden  aunt 
living  for  orphans  and  others,  or  a  hivad  win- 
ner in  the  oflSce  or  store  for  the  family,  or  an 
angel  of  the  gospel  in  heathen  lands;  better 
over  and  over  again  be  an  independent  and  re- 
spected woman  than  the  oppressed  and  broken- 
hearted wife  of  a  dissipated  and  little  Tom 
Thumb  of  a  husband. 

YOUNG  WOMEN  DON'T  RESPECT    THEMSELVES  AS 
MUCH  AS  YOUNG  MEN . 

I  want  to  say  a  plain  word  because  I  cannot 
afford  to  sacrifice  truth  for  the  sake  of  being 
gallant.  Many  young  women  will  court  the  so- 
ciety of  young  men  and  go  in  company  with 
them  when  they  know  they  are  fast  and  have 
the  drink  habit,  and  so  they  set  a  premium  on 
that  sort  of  a  life,  and  let  themselves  down  to 
the  same  level.  Beit  said  to  the  praise  of 
young  men  that  they  will  not  be  seen  in  public 
with  young  women  of  questionable  char^jcter, 
nor  will  they  make  an  equal  of  them,  and  never 
a  wife.  In  this  respect  the  young  men  are 
prouder  than  many  young  women.  Young 
women  ought  to  band  together  and  ignore  the 
society  of  all  impure  young  men. 

don't  MARRY  A  MAN  TO  REFORM  HIM  . 

In  ninety-nine  cases  out  ot  every  hundred  he 
will  never  reform,  and  you  will  be  a  disappoint- 
ed and  miserable  woman  for  life.    It  is  a  law 


THE  CHOICE  OF  A  HUSBAND 


61 


almost  as  unalterable  as  that  of  the  Medes  and 
Persian's  that  libertines  and  drunkards  and  im- 
moral men  will  never  reform.  It  is  also  an  in- 
exorable law  that  men  drag  their  wives  down  to 
their  own  level.  You  may  not  partake  of  their 
habits,  but  in  the  eyes  of  society  your  place 
will  be  ranked  by  that  of  your  husband.  There 
are  some  exceptions  to  these  rules  but  they  are 
rare.  There  are  wives  who  are  the  great  cen- 
tral figures  of  the  heme  and  so  recognized  by 
society  and  where  the  husband  is  an  unknown 
nonentity,  and  there  are  instances  where  men 
reform,  but  the  rule  is  as  a  man  is  at  thirty  so 
he  will  continue  to  the  end  of  life.  Sisters  go 
out  from  the  same  mother's  knee  and  are  a 
thousand  miles  apart  in  society  because  they 
married  men  a  thousand  miles  apart  in  morals 
and  industry  and  character.  In  all  of  our  cities 
there  are  countless  examples  of  miserable  lives, 
where  women  have  married  men  to  reform  them 
and  they  have  failed,  and  they  can  never  take 
their  former  position  ag^in.  I  think  in  many 
instances  the  reformation  of  the  men  was  only 
the  pretence  under  which  they  got  married; 
they  were  bound  to  get  married  anyway.  I 
would  sooner  undertake  to  civilize  the  wild 
beasts  of  the  jungles  and  the  forests  as  to  re- 
form the  libertine  and  the  drunkard,  and  any 
woman  who  does  so  takes  an   awful   risk  and 


62 


MAKRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


does  a  foolhardy  thing.  Of  how  many  pure  and 
lovely  girls  can  it  b@  said, 

*'He  led  me  down  from  love  and  light. 
From  all  that  made  htr  pathway  bright; 
And  chained  her  thtre  mid  want  and  strife. 
That  feeble  thing — a  drunkard's  wife." 

don't  marry  a  dude. 
He  is  a  little  show  window  with  waxed  mus- 
tache, and  shining  shoes,  and  foppish  apparel 
through  which  there  peeps  a  little  surface  man 
without  weight  of  brain,  or  strength  of  charac- 
ter, a  mere  feather  weight  in  society.  How  can 
a  woman  with  force  of  character  respect  him 
and  look  up  to  him  as  her  husband?  You  can 
make  something  out  of  a  plain  man  who  has 
never  seen  a  barber  shop  if  he  has  the  princi- 
ple and  force  in  him,  but  with  the  dude,  ex 
nihilo  nihil  fit,  from  nothing  you  can  make 
nothing. 

don't  marry  an  idler. 
If  a  man  is  twenty-five  years  of  age  and  has 
nothing,  and  cannot  make  a  living  for  himself 
it  is  certain  he  cannot  make  a  living  for  you 
also.  ''When  hunger  peaks  through  the  key 
hole  love  goes  out  through  the  window.'  There 
is  more,  than  one  way  of  going  to  the  poor 
house,  but  the  meanest  way  is  the  married  way. 
A  man  may  be  destitute  of  money  and  yet  be 
the  grandest  young  man  in  the  community,  but 


THE  CHOICE  OF  A  HUSBAND 


63 


be  must  be  possessed  of  true  manhood  and  be 
making  an  effort  to  bring  things  to  pass  and  not 
be  preying  on  his  friends,  and  playing  the  part 
^'pussy  wants  a  corner"  without  working  for  it. 
Never  marry  a  man  who  is  waiting  for  some 
rich  friend  to  die  to  make  him  a  living,  and  the 
very  intimation  of  such  an  expectation  ought  to 
suffice  for  you  fco  reject  him. 

don't  marsy  a  meee  pedigree. 

There  are  many  American  girls  who  have  a 
craze  to  marry  some  Count,  or  Prince,  or  titled 
royalty  in  the  old  countries,  or  legacy  or  home, 
I  am  reminded  of  an  American  who  wanted  to 
trade  horses  with  a  German.  The  American 
had  a  poor  borse  witb  a  long  pedigree,  and  the 
German  had  a  good  horse  without  a  pedigree, 
and  after  much  persuasion  on  the  part  of  the 
American  on  the  pedigree  of  his  horse  the  Ger- 
man said  in  very  emphatic  language,  ^'he  would 
sooner  have  a  horse  without  a  pedigree  as  a 
pedigree  vfithout  a  horse."  How  many  marry 
a  title  without  a  man, 

"In  a  marriage  for  gold, 

The  bride  is  bought  and  the  bridegroom  is  sold." 
don't  be  unequally  yoked  in  age. 

If  you  marry  a  man  twice  your  own  age  you 
caiiRot  hope  for  a  happy  married  life.  You  will 
desire  to  go  out  in  society  and  he  will  want  to 
stay  at  home,  and  at  last  you  will  wake  up  t® 


64 


MAKRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


the  fact  that  you  have  married  a  superannuated 
husband  to  wait  on.  Many  men  insist  on  mar- 
rying women  only  one  half  their  own  age,  and 
they  ought  not  to  find  fault  when  women  get 
tired  of  them  and  leave  them. 

MARRY  A  MAN  WHOSE  FORTUNE  IS  IN  HIMSELF. 

Sensible  women  love  men  who  are  manly  and 
brave  and  heroic,  and  not  because  they  are  ef- 
feminate and  foppish.  Many  men  not  so  sensi- 
ble love  women  who  are  delicate  and  handsome 
and  destitute  of  the  more  wearable  qualities. 
Marry  a  man  who  is  at  least  your  equal  in  in- 
tellect, and  then  you  can  respect  him,  a  man 
who  is  virtuous  and  pure,  and  then  your  home 
will  be  a  paradise,  a  man  who  is  industrious  and 
then  you  will  be  blessed  with  plenty,  a  man 
who  has  respect  for  chiistianity  and  then  your 
earthly  home  will  always  face  your  heavenly 
one,  a  man  who  is  honest  and  ambitious  and 
then  you  will  be  respected  in  society,  a  man  you 
can  love  for  his  character  and  not  for  his  for- 
tune and  then  you  will  have  a  good  conscience 
and  a  happy  life,  a  man  you  have  known  and 
whose  people  are  well  respected,  and  never  a 
stranger  or  newspaper  adviser  and  then  you 
will  not  make  a  mistake;  marry  a  man  for  his 
real  value  and  true  manhood  and  who  is  a  for- 
tune in  himself.  *^When  material  considera- 
tions enter  no  longer  into  the  contracting  of  a 


THE  CHOICE  OF  A  HUSBAND  65 

marriage,  when  woman  is  free  to  choose  and  is 
not  compelled  to  sell  herself,  when  man  is 
obliged  to  compote  for  woman's  favor  with  his 
personality  and  not  with  his  social  position  and 
property  then  the  institution  of  matrimony  will 
be  a  truth  and  not  a  lie."  ''The  Lord  grant  you 
that  ye  may  find  rest,  each  of  you  in  the  house 
of  her  husband."  Amen. 


66 


MAERIAGE  AND  THE  H{  ME 


The  Model  Wife, 

A  light  wife  doth  make  a  heavy  hiislmnd. 

-—Merchant  of  Venice. 

AM  other  goods  by  fortune's  hand  are  given, 
A  wife  is  the  peculiar  gift  of  heaven.    — Poije. 

A  virtuous  wcinan  is  a  crown  to  her  husband . 
Her  prite  is  far  abuve  rubies.  The  heart  of  Iut 
husband  doth  safely  trust  in  her  She  will  do  him 
good  and  not  evil  all  the  days  of  his  life.  Her 
husband  is  known  in  the  gates,  when  he  sitteth 
among  the  elders  of  the  land.  Strength  and  honor 
are  her  clothing  and  she  shall  rejoice  in  time  to 
come.  She  openeth  her  mouth  in  wisdom  ;  and  in 
her  tongue  is  the  law  of  kindness.  She  looketh 
well  to  the  ways  of  her  household,  and  eateth  not 
the  bread  of  idleness.  Her  ^^hildren  arise  up  and 
call  her  blessed:  her  husband  also,  and  he  praiseth 
her. — Proverbs- 

I  have  chosen  for  my  subject  tonight  the 
Model  Wife.  It  is  a  very  easy  subject  as  every 
husband  thinks  she  lives  in  his  home.  I  as- 
sume the  responsibility  of  giving  you  a  portrait 
of  a  perfect  woman,  and  shall  try  and  have  the 
photo  and  the  original  correspond. 


THE  MODEL  WIFE 


67 


IMPROVE  YOURSELF  INTELLECTUALLY. 

If  the  husband  is  absorbed  in  business,  and 
the  wife  is  absorbed  in  the  home  they  have 
nothing  in  common,  and  they  drift  apart  until 
they  reach  the  place  where  the  husband  would 
sooner  converse  with  someone  else  than  his  wife. 
You  do  not  like  to  correspond  with  people  who 
have  no  interest  in  your  business,  and  tlius 
brothers  and  sisters  as  they  follow  different  vo- 
cations in  life  often  cease  to  correspond  w^ith 
each  other.  The  wife  ouc/ht  to  keep  up  her 
reading  and  her  music,  and.  be  able  to  entertain 
and  converse  with  her  husband  on  the  topics 
of  the  day.  The  farmer's  wife  ought  to  read 
his  agricultural  paper,  and  th^^  physician's  wife 
his  medical  journal,  and  the  teacher's  wif® 
ought  to  take  an  interest  in  peda2:ogy,  and  so 
with  all  the  callings  of  life.  Many  wives  lose 
their  hold  on  their  husbands  because  they  take 
no  interest  in  their  businesss. 

MAKE  THE  BEST  OUT  OF  YOUR  HUSBAND. 

Some  wives  piide  themselves  in  speaking  out 
their  minds,  and  by  that  they  mean  a  Jack- 
blunt,  and  sledge-hammer  way  of  expressing 
themselves.  It  is  true  they  avoid  hypocrisy; 
but  it  is  also  true  that  they  render  themselves 
very  disagreeable.  If  we  cannot  have  our  ideal 
it  is  wnse  to  sweetly  accept  the  next  best  thing. 
I  have  known  some  wives  live  with    their  hus- 


68 


MAERIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


bands  who  were  much  their  inferior,  and  yet 
the  union  w^as  a  happy  one,  and  all  because  the 
patient,  loving  wife  lived  her  wedding  vow,  ''for 
better  or  worse,"  as  long  as  they  lived.  A  good 
wife  never  puts  her  Q:ifts  in  contrast  with -those 
of  her  less  gifted  husband.  She  may  see  the 
end  of  a  story  before  he  see^  half  way,  yet  she 
patiently  waits  for  him.  Tf  married  peo^jle 
would  make  the  beet  out  of  the  situation  there 
would  be  many  happier  homes  and  fewer  di- 
vorces. 

BEAR  AND  FOSBEAR. 

There  is  in  every  married  life  something  to 
bear  and  forbear,  and  these  two  bears  start  out 
from  every  wedding  altar.  Some  are  bound  to 
have  the  last  word,  and  mxay  be  known  as  the 
tit-for-tat  wives,  and  it  never  works  well- 
"Angry  words  stir  up  strife,  but  a  soft  answer 
turneth  away  wrath."  Others  are  sullen,  or  cry 
and  pout  when  there  is  some  unpleasantness  in 
the  home  and  that  is  a  failure.  The  patient  lov- 
ing wife,  the  chet  rful  and  hopeful  wins  and  a^ 
the  same  time  rebukes  her  husband  with  her 
kindness  of  spirit.  A  divorced  \^oman  said  to 
me,  "if  I  had  ray  married  life  to  live  over  again 
I  think  I  could  be  more  successful.  It  was  the 
first  bitter  word  and  then  we  kept  drifting  apart 
and  I  would  not  relent."  When  your  husband 
comes  home  at  night  very  tired,  and  it  may  be 


THE  MODEL  WIFE. 


69 


aloorriy  and  not  talkative  don't  be  impatient  and 
sullen  too.  In  the  store  he  has  met  the  most 
exasperating  man  or  woman,  or  he  has  been 
swindled  out  of  an  account,  and  his  business 
troubles  have  set  his  brain  reeling.  There  is 
not  one  husband  in  every  hundred  who  can 
come  home  all  sunshine  at  eventide  who  has 
had  it  all  tempest  and  cyclone  during  the  day, 
and  if  hip  answers  to  your  questions  are  decid- 
edly short  make  the  best  of  the  situation  and 
be  at  your  sunniest.  ,Never^,.nag  your  husband 
about  not  being  able  to  provide  for  you  as  amp- 
ly as  other  men,  and  if  you  do,  take  my  word 
for  it  that  he  will  not  take  it  kindly.  The* 
thirty -first  chapter  of  Pi  overbs  draws  a  full 
portrait  of  a  perfect  wife  and  every  woman 
out/ht  to  read  that  chapter  once  a  month.  It 
represents  her  as  a  virtuous  woman,  an  indus- 
trious wom^an,  a  clean  and  hospitable  woman, 
and  an'ample  provider  for  the  home. 

'•Within  the  home  she  rules  with  quiet  might, 

By  virtue  of  her  perfect  womanhood  ; 

A  clnld  in  years,  but  with  all  g^race  and  uood 

Enshrined  in  her  truth-flashing  orbs  of  hght, 

A  woman  strong  and  firm  to  do  the  right. 

Who  witn  old-time  martvrs  might  have  stood, 

Yet  full  of  sympathy  with  ev' ry  mood. 

In  times  of  trouble  cheery  still  and  bright; 

O  Queen  of  maidens:    it  must  surely  be, 

If  ought  that  to  perfection  eometh  near 


70 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


Can  e'er  be  found  m  this  imperfect  life, 
You  perfecj  daughter,  will  but  disappear 
To  shine  as  perfect  mother,  perfect  wife. 

— Weatherly. 

MAKE  YOURSELF  AND  HOME  ATTRACTIVE. 

What  a  chano^e  in  the  appearance  of  many 
women  from  their  courting  to  their  married 
days.  Will  not  some  artist  throw  the  picture 
on  canvass,  before  and  after  taken?  No  hus- 
band can  love  and  respect  a  slovenly,  untidy 
woman  with  disheveled  hair,  and  a  rag-heap  ap- 
pearance generally.  It  does  not  require  costly 
wardrobe  bat  clean  and  neat  apparel.  You  are 
queen  of  the  home,  and  no  matter  what  the 
world  says  to  the  contrary  you  are  the  head  of 
the  family,  and  the  home  above  all  other  places 
must  be  attractive.  The  meals  must  be 
prompt,  and  clean  and  good  for  your  husband 
has  not  become  so  ethereal  as  not  to  love  a  good 
dinner.  His  wardrobe  must  be  in  order  and 
the  home  so  pleasant  that  it  outbids  all  other 
places  for  his  presence.  I  sjnnpathise  with 
those  wives  who  enjoy  an  innocent  g8me  with 
their  husbands  in  the  evenings  to  quiet  their 
nerves  and  atone  in  part  for  the  vexing  cares 
and  burdens  of  the  day.  Never  sacrifice  the 
kome  to  the  Woman's  club,  or  to  any  society  in 
church  or  out  of  it.  A  husband  said  to  me  I 
would  give  one  hundred  dollars  annually  to  a 


THE  MODEL  WIFE. 


71 


certain  society  if  my  wife  would  never  go  near 
it.  Don't  let  any  Sv)ciety  make  your  life  a  bore 
to  your  husband.  There  are  women  who  have 
a  mission  outside  tlie  home  but  most  of  you 
can  accomplish  more  for  your  family  and  more 
for  the  cause  of  right  in  your  homes  than  any 
place  else. 

Think  not  tlie  husband  gained  that  ah  is  done ; 
'J'he  prize  of  ha.p[)iness  must  still  be  won; 
And  oft  the  careless  find  it  to  their  cosl, 
The  lover  in  the  husband  may  be  lost; 
The  graces  might  alone  his  heart  allure, 
They  and  the  virtues  meeting  must  secure. 
Let  e'en  your  prudence  wear  the  pleasing  dress 
Of  care  for  him  and  anxious  tenderness. 
From  kind  concern  about  his  weal  or  woe, 
Let  each  domestic  duty  seem  to  flow. 
Kndearing  thus  the  common  acts  of  life. 
The  mistress  still  shall  charm  him  in  the  wife. 

— Lyddleton. 

LIVE  WITHIN  YOUK  MEANS. 

It  is  a  splendid  sight  to  see  the  wife  of  afflu- 
ence when  financial  disaster  comes  adapt  her- 
self to  the  inevitable  gracefully,  and  with  serene 
faith  make  the  best  of  the  situation.  I  admire 
the  bride  coming  from  a  luxurious  home  who 
can  take  her  place  in  her  husband's  plain  dwel- 
ling and  adjust  herself  so  sweetly  to  the  cir- 
cumstances that  society  would  never  dream  that 


72 


MAKRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


she  had  lived  in  a  palace.    Many  are  constant 
reminders  to  their  husbands  that  they  ]iave  not 
been  accustomed  to  a  plain  home.    Too  much 
society  has  mortgaged  many  a  mansion,  and 
filled  many  a  home  with  misery.    The  sensible 
woman  is  willing  to  bear  half  the   burdens  of 
the  home  and  work  when  the  necessities  of  life 
demand  it.    Said  a  young  husband  whose  bus- 
iness speculations  were    unsuccessful:  ."Why? 
wife's  silver  tea  set,  the  bridal  gift  of  her  rich 
uncle,  doomed  me  to  financial  rain.    It  involved 
me  in  a  hundred  unexpected  expenses,  which, 
in  trying  to  meet,  have  made  me  the  bankrupt 
that  I  am."    One  sensible  father   had  printed 
on  his  daughter's  wedding  cards:    *'No  pres- 
ents, except  those  adapted   to   an  income  of 
one  thousand    dollars."    A   single  shad  was 
caught  in  the  Delaware  early  in  the  season  and 
prepared  for  Washington's  table.     He  asked 
^the  cost  of  the  fish  and  on  learning  that  it  cost 
three  dollars  ordered  it  from  his   table   as  he 
could  not  set  sach  an  example  of  extravagance 
and  luxury.    There  is  many  a  cramped  old  age 
from  the  extravagance  of  youth  and  when  the 
income  was  sufficient  to  lay  up   a   little  for  a 
rainy  day 

BE  TRUE  TO  YOUR  HUSBAND. 

There  are  two  classes  of  women  that  make  me 
saspicLoa*.    Tii3  first  class  talks  to  some  friend. 


THE  MODEL  WIFE 


73 


about  the  short  comings  of  her  husband,  and 
this  friend  tells  some  other  friend,  and  the  wife 
that  treats  her  husband  in  that  way  forfeits  my 
respect.  She  lives  with  him  and  shares  his  hard 
earnings  and  yet  is  untrue  to  him.  Better 
spread  the  mantle  of  charity  over  his  faults 
than  advertise  them.  The  other  class  advertise 
their  husband's  frailties  unconsciously.  They 
are  too  fulsome  of  their  praises  and  there  comes 
to  you  the  suspicion  that  if  their  husbands  are 
so  good  so  much  praise  is  unnecessary.  Great 
exaggerations  never  impress  people  favorably. 
There  is  no  one  outside  of  your  own  home 
should  ever  hear  a  depreciating  word  about 
your  husband,  and  no  true  v»^ife  will  so  treat 
him.  You  don't  need  any  advice  volunteered 
as  to  how  to  manage  your  husband.  Don't  let 
your  married  relations,  or  any  other  busy  bod- 
ies break  into  the  happiness  of  your  home. 
Make  the  fixed  habit  of  your  life  to  visit  with 
your  husband  every  day,  and  he  will  say  in  his 
heart  concerning  a  true-to-the-death  wife, 

'  'She  is  mine  owd  ; 
And  las  rich  i  i  having  such  a  jewel 
As  twenty  seas  if  all  their  sand  were  pearl. 
The  waters  nectar,  and  the  rocks  pure  gold.'* 

BE  A  CHRISTIAN  WIFE. 

If  you  sacrifice  the  church  to  the  worldly 
club,  and  the  prayer  meeting  to  progressive  (  u- 


74  MAP.RIAGS  AND   THE  HOMli: 

chre  and  the  theatre  your  reliction  will  be  the 
standing  joke  of  the  family.  There  is  not  an 
angel  in  heaven,  nor  a  man  on  the  earth  who 
has  as  much  influence  over  your  husband  as 
yourself  if  you  are  a  true  wife.  Your  husband 
is  proud  to  say  that  he  is  a  brother-in-law  to 
thn  church  and  that  his  wift3  is  a  member  of  the 
cijuTch!  Tlie  best  place  in  all  this  world  to 
find  out  how  much  relii^iou  a  Vv^ife  has  is  in  the 
-home,  and  no  one  knows  it  so  well  as  the  hus- 
band. I  cHu  oiily  eall  to  mind  two  bad  wives 
ill  the  bible  and  those  wert^  Job's  v/ife  and  Jez- 
cb.'!;  but  I  read  of  Elizibetli,  and  Ruth,  and 
Mary,  and  Deboraii,  a; id  Sarah,  and  Jochebed, 
and  Esther,  and  Racheb  and  Eve,  and  Naomi, 
and  the  good  have  preponderated  ever  since. 
Spurgeon  says,  ^'My  exi)erience  of  my  first  wife, 
who  will  I  hiope,  live  to  be  my  last,  is  much  as 
follow^;:  Matrimony  came  from  Paradise  and 
leads  to  it.  I  never  was  half  so  happy  before  I 
was  a  m.arried  man  as  I  am  now.  When  you  ^ 
are  married  your  bliss  begins.  I  have  no  doubt 
that  where  there  is  much  love  there  is  much  to 
love,  and  where  love  is  scant,  faults  will  be 
plentiful.  If  there  is  one  good  wife  in  England, 
I  am  the  man  who  put  the  ling  on  her  finger, 
and  long  may  she  wear  it.  God  bless  the  dear 
soul,  if  she  can  put  up  with  me  she  shall  never 
be  put  down  by  me."    Men  are  not  so  talkative 


THE  MODEL  WIFE 


75 


about  the  races  and  virtues  of  their  wives  as 
wives  are  aboat  their  husbands,  but  they  ap- 
preciate them  just  as  much.  The  model  woman 
is  neat  in  appearance  and  as  she  advances  in 
life  she  makes  the  study  of  personal  appear- 
ance a  science;  she  keeps  up  with  the  intellectual 
spirit  of  the  age,  and  is  sensible  and  pure  and  a 
christian;  her  husband  thinks  of  her, 

She  was  my  peer ; 
No  weakling  girl,  who  would  surreuder  will 
And  life  and  reason,  with  her  loving  heart, 
To  her  possessor;  no  soft,  clinging  thing 
Who  would  find  breath  alone  within  the  arms 
Of  a  strong  master,  and  obediently 
Wait  on  his  will  in  slavish  carefulness  ; 
No  fawning,  cringing  spaniel  to  attend 
His  royal  pleasure,  and  account  herself 
.  Rewarded  by  his  [nits  and  pretty  words, 
But  a  sounel  woman,  who,  with  insiglit  keen. 
Had  wrought  a  scheme  of  life,  and  Uicasured  well 
Her  womanhood:  had  spread  before  her  feet 
A  fine  philo^^ophy  to  ^  uide  her  steps  ; 
Had  won  a  faith  to  which  her  life  was  brought 
In  strict  a  ljustment — brain  and  iieart  meanwhile 
Working  in  conscious  liarmony  i\n'\  rhythm 
With  the  great  scheme  of  (rod's  great  universe 
On  towards  her  being's  end.  — HclUnd. 

Such  a  woman  is  a  queen,  and  her  husband 
lives  with  a  model  wife,  and  if  lie  not  po- 
etical he  uiinks  in  good  prose. 


76 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


'^Whab  is  tliere  in  the  vale  of  life 
Half  so  delightful  as  a  wife, 
When  friendship,  love  and  peace  combine, 
To  stamp  the  marriage  bond  divine? 
The  stream  of  pure  and  genuine  love 
Derives  its  current  from  above ; 
And  earth  a  second  Eden  shows, 
Where'er  the  healing  waters  flows/' — ^Cowper, 


LIBRARY 
■  THE 

UNIVERSITY  OF  ILLINOIS 


CHAPLAIN  McCABE,  D.  D. 


77 


The  Model  Husband, 

O  ye  gods, 
Render  me  worthy  of  this  noble  wife. 

— Julius  Csesar. 

A  good  husband  makes  a  good  wile  at  any  time. 

— Farquhar. 

Let  husband  know, 
Their  wives  have  sense  like  them. — Othelo. 

The  kindest  and  the  happiest  pair, 

Will  find  occasion  to  forbear ; 

And  something  every  day  they  live 

To  pity,  and  perhaps  forgive.    — Cowper. 

Husbands  love  your  wives  even  as  Christ  also 
ioved  the  church,  and  gave  himself  for  it;  that  he 
might  sanctify  and  cleanse  it  with  the  washing  of 
water  by  the  word.  80  ought  men  to  love  their 
wives  as  their  own  bodies.  Ke  that  loveth  his  wife 
ioveth  himself.  Let  every  one  of  you  in  particular 
so  love  his  wife  even  as  himself;  vnd  the  wife  see 
that  she  reverence  her  husband. — Paul. 

One  week  a^o  I  took  for  my  su  bjeL'>  the  Mod- 
el Wife,  and  now  I  will  address  yori  on  the 
Model  Husband.    The  Vv^ord   Iw  shi  means 


78 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


house -band:  as  a  band  keeps  toi^etlier  tlie  sli^v-if 
of  corn  or  wheat  so  Uib  true  husband  keeps  t'le 
family  together.  Many  so  called  husbands  are 
misnomers,  and  the  wife  is  the  husband  bec^'.nse 
by  her  sacrifice  and  toil  ^he  provides  for  the 
family.  I  am  giving  you  ia  this  series  of  lec- 
tures on  the  Home  practical  lessons  in  every 
day  life,  and  telling  you  the  plain  unvarnished 
truth.  According  to  some  authorities  the 
honey-moon  oaly  lasts  one  month,  and  then  the 
bride  and  bridegroom  assame  the  more  digai- 
fied  titles  of  husband  and  wife.  The  honey- 
moon oaght  to  last  longer,  it  ought  to  last  for 
life. 

YOUR  wife's  CONFIDENCE  IN  YOU. 

It  IS  a  marvellous  picture  to  look  at  the  young 
wo  man  leaying  her  childhood  home  for  the 
home  of  her  husband.  She  is  standing  on  the 
threshold  saying  good  bye  to  her  parents  and 
little  brothers  and  sisters,  to  those  who  have 
loved  her  as  dearly  as  life,  and  who  have  watch- 
ed over  her  every  day  and  night,  and  sacrificed 
for  her  at  every  cost,  and  nursed  her  with  an 
angel's  care  into  splendid  womanhood.  She  is 
adorned  in  her  wedding  apparel,  and  she  gives 
up  the  scenes  of  her  childhood,  and  her  girl 
associates,  and  every  dear  one  of  the  old  home, 
and  starts  out  for  life  with  lier  husband.  As 
she  started  out  with  you,  she  said,  ^'I  trust  you 


the;  model  husband 


79 


as  my  provider,  I  trust  you  to  be  true  to  me 
while  life  slmll  last,  I  trust  you  to  make  my  fu- 
ture home  hs  pleasant  as  my  childhood  home,  I 
will  follow  you  among  strangers  and  if  need  be 
to  the  ends  of  the  earth;"  implicit  trust,  mar- 
vellous confidence  on  the  part  of  the  wife  to 
chain  the  car  of  her  destiny  to  you;  tremendous 
responsibility  on  the  part  of  the  husband  to 
say  "I  will  be  more  to  you  than  all  the  dear 
ones  you  have  left  behind  you."  Any  man  who 
will  betray  such  implicit  confidence,  such  love, 
is  a  traitor  of  the  inkiest  dye.  How  many  have 
been  led  from  the  parent's  fondest  care  to  Dan- 
te's Inferno,  or  Paradise  Lost,  or  an  Anderson- 
ville  prison  for  life. 

BE  A  MANLY  HUSBAND. 

The  wife  admires  the  manly,  the  brave,  the 
honorable  in  her  husband  more  than  the  effem- 
inate, and  mere  beauty  of  face.  She  almost 
adores  nobility  of  character  and  glorious  man- 
hood. One  of  the  smallest  husbands  I  ever 
read  of  is  Ahab,  He  wanted  Naboth's  vine- 
yard, and  Naboth  could  not  give  it  to  him  on 
religious  grounds,  so  Ahab  went  home  and  went 
to  bed,  and  turned  his  face  to  the  wall  and  had 
a  gloomy,  sulking  spell  until  his  wife  found  out 
his  trouble  and  coaxed  him  out  of  bed,  and  told 
him  to  be  cheerful  for  she  woviivl  get  the  vine- 
yard for  him.    When  she  gave  liim   the  vine- 


80 


MARRIAGE  AND   THE  HOME 


yard  he  went  down  to  see  it  as  if  he  had  earned 
it.    It  is  a  sorry  sight  to  see  a    little  husband 
who  never  earned  a  dollar  in  his  I  fe  playing  the 
role  of  a  man  of  mind  and  business-strength  cn 
the  brain  and  capital  of  his  wife.    Many  wives 
have  learned  a  lesson  from  Queeji  Esther  when 
she  went  into^  court  which  was  not  lawful  for  a 
woman  to  do,  and  stood  at  the  door  and  dared 
not  venture  into  his  presence  until  she  saw  that 
the  king — her  husband  was  in  good  spirits,  and 
then  she  made  known  her  request  and  he  grant- 
ed it,  so  many  women  wdien  they  want  a  dress 
or  something  for  the  house  watch    their  hus- 
bands until  they  are  especially  in  good  humor, 
and  then  approach  them,  and  hence  you  hear 
wives  say,  "I  know  how  to  work  my  husband." 
Two  snakes  were  found  in  the  house  of  Titus 
Oracchus.    The  Augurs  said  that  one  of  them 
must  die.    If  the  male  snake  were  put  to  death 
Cornelia  the  wife  would  die,  if  the  female  snake 
Titus  the  husband  would  die.    Then  said  Titus 
Q-racchus,  ''dismiss  the  female  so  that  Cornelia 
may  live  for  she  is  the  younger   of    the  two." 
Her  husband's  memory  was  immortal  to  her, 
and  she  refused  the  hand  of  the  king  of  Egypt 
in  marriage  so  precious  to  her  was  the   name  of 
Titus  Q-racchus.    Every  wife   stands    a  hand 
breadth  higher  who  has  a  heroic,  self  sacrific- 
iiig  and  manly  husband. 


THE  MODEL  HUSBAND 


81 


STAY  AT  HOME  AND  BE  YOUR  BEST  THERE. 

Every  husband  ought  to  spend  his  evenings 
at  home  when  he  is  not  necessitated  to  be  ab- 
sent on  business.  No  husband  has  a  right  to 
attend  all  sorts  of  clubs  and  lodges  and  come 
home  at  midnight  and  never  let  his  wife  know 
of  his  whereabouts  and  business.  If  your 
wives  were  absent  three  nights  of  every  week 
attending  societies  you  would  like  to  know 
v'here  they  were  or  there  would  be  a  tempest 
in  many  homes.  .The  meal  hour  and  after  sup- 
per ought  to  be  the  visiting  hours  of  husbands 
and  wives.  The  wife  has  not  been  out  daring 
the  day  and  has  not  had  your  opportunity  for 
knowing  the  events  of  the  day,  and  you  cught 
to  pleasantly  talk  with  her  about  all  the  little 
happenings.  Some  husbands  never  say  a  word 
at  meal  time,  and  ent  as  if  they  only  had  three 
minutes  for  the  meal,  then  shove  back  theij- 
chairs  before  the  family  are  half  through,  snaj) 
up  a  newspaper  and  read  for  a  few  minutes,  then 
light  a  cigar  and  start  for  business  as  if  *  they 
had  no  wife  or  children.  It  is  a  ver}^  selfish 
and  unpleasant  way  of  living.  Your  home  may 
be  a  mansion  and  you  may  have  all  the  luxuries 
of  life,  and  yet  if  you  are  not  that  indescriba- 
ble, thoughtful,  tender-hearted  husband  in  all 
the  little  courtesies  anrl  events  of  the  home  your 
wife  after  all  may  be  eking  out  a  heart-broken 


82 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


existence,  and  your  palatial  residence  may  give 
the  lie  to  the  real  life  lived  within.  Husbands 
are  not  thoughtful  enough  abjat  the  many  lit- 
tle things  of  the  home.  They  nes^er  sa  y  a  word 
of  appreciation  about  the  good  coffee,  or  good 
bread,  or  tender  steak,  but  are  swift  to  notice 
something  that  is  not  as  tasty  as  the  good  wife 
had  intended.  The  place  for  the  fragrant  rosea 
are  not  on  the  wife's  casket  when  dead,  but  on 
her  heart  while  living.  Theraare  a  great  many 
husbands  who  have  never  made  an  apology  in 
their  lives  and  yet  they  have  a  thousand  things 
to  apologize  for.  Your  wife  is  the  best  friend 
you  have  in  all  this  world  and  as  she  advances 
in  life  and  her  hair  is  silvered  with  grey,  and 
the  rosy  cheek  is  fading,  and  the  lustre  of  the 
eye  is  dimming  let  the  courtesies  of  life  in- 
crease, and  your  love  grow  stronger,  and  your 
fidelity  wax  warmer. 

BE  FAITFUL  TO  YOUR  WIFE. 

You  remember  when  you  stood  before  the 
wedding  altar  and  the  minister  asked  you  in  the 
presence  ol  God  and  man,  ''Wilt  thou  have  this 
woman  to  be  thy  wedded  wife,  to  live  together 
after  God's  ordinance  in  the  holy  estate  of  mat- 
rimony, wilt  thou  love  her,  comfort  and  keep 
her  in  sickness  and  in  health,  and  forsaking  all 
other  keep  thee  only  unto  her  so  long  as  ye 
both  shall  live?"  and  you  ans weired,  "I  will." 


THE  MODEL  HUSBAND 


83 


And  then  as  you  placed  the  ring  upon  her  fin- 
ger you  said  to  her  ''with  this  ring  I  thee  wed, 
with  my  worldly  goods  I  thee  endow,  in  the 
name  of  the  Father,  and  of  the  Son,  and  of  the 
Holy  Grhost,  Imen."  The  engagement  ring  or 
the  wedding  which  you  placed  upon  her  hand 
is  endless  like  a  circle,  and  is  an  emblem  of 
eternity;  and  means  endless  fidelity,  endless 
love,  endless  purity.  In  the  business  world 
there  is  no  language  too  strong  to  condemn  a 
man  who  won't  fulfil  his  contract,  and  yet  you 
made  one  a  thousand  fold  stronger  with  your 
wife,  a  life  contract  that  you  would  be  true  to 
her  until  death.  No  married  man  has  any  right 
to  indulge  in  flirtations  with  other  women,  and 
to  be  hilarious  with  joy  in  their  company  while 
he  is  gloomy  and  prosaic  with  his  own  wife.  A 
young  woman  was  betrothed  to  a  young  man 
just  before  the  war  broke  out,  and  in  a  battle 
lost  both  arms.  He  gallantly  had  a  comrade 
write  her  telling  the  sad  news  and  at  the  same 
time  relieving  her  of  the  engagement.  She 
took  the  first  train  for  the  southe  rn  hospital, 
and  married  him,  and  made  him  a  living.  Wha^ 
true  iovv3,  what  fidelity?  It  matters  not  what 
may  befall  your  companion  you  are  to  be  all  the 
more  faithful  until  death.  No  man  deserves  a 
wife,  or  is  worthy  of  the  name  of  husband  who 
does  not  turn  over  every  stone  to  make  a  liveli- 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


liocd  for  his  family.  Worse  than  the  Sabbath 
breaker,  worse  than  the  drunkard,  worse  than 
the  infidel  is  the  man  who  won't  provide  for 
his  own  household. 

BE  A  CHRISTIAN  HUSBAND. 

Never  compel  your  wife  to  go  with  you  to 
questionable  places  of  amusement  so  that  she 
feels  she  must  give  up  her  church,  or  be  criti- 
cised for  inconsistency.  Never  ask  her  to  com- 
promise her  christian  character.  Slie'  left  a 
liome  of  prayer,  a  pious  mother  dedicated  her 
to  Q-od  in  infancy,  and  it  may  be  you  have  ta- 
ken very  little  interest  in  the  church  of  Jesus 
Christ.  Is  it  not  unfair  to  put  the  whole  relig- 
ious responsibility  upon  your  wife,  and  have 
her  send  the  children  to  Sunday  school,  and  go 
to  church  alone  and  you  stay  at  home.  There 
is  nothing  that  would  bring  such  consolation  to 
her  heart  as  to  see  you  the  head  of  the  home 
religiously.  Many  a  father  is  responsible  for 
the  waywardness  of  his  boys  for  he  has  set  them 
the  example,  and  they  grow  up  Ui  his  footsteps 
and  have  no  regard  for  the  religious  life.  Many 
wives  and  mothers  have  supported  the  church, 
and  carried  the  whole  family  into  the  kingdom 
of  heaven  while  the  husband  never  raised  a 
hand,  and  it  may  be  opposed  the  wife  giving 
money  to  support  the  church,  and  was  unpleas- 
ant himself  when  she  went  to    the   means  of 


THE  MODEL  HUSBAND 


85 


grace.  Your  model  is  Abraham,  he  commanded 
his  household  to  keep  the  ways  of  the  Lord. 
The  model  husband  will  not  let  his  business 
run  him,  but  he  will  run  his  business, and  make 
ic  subserve  every  interest  of  his  home  socially, 
intellectually  and  religiously. 

BE  SYMPATHETIC. 

There  are  hearts  breaking  everywhere  for 
want  of  appreciation,  for  want  of  sympathy. 
Some  husbands  think  their  wives'  work  of  very 
iittle  iuiportance  and  scarcely  ever  refer  to  it, 
and  no  wife  likes  to  have  her  labor  underesti- 
mate .  Your  work  is  done,  your  w^ife's  work 
is  never  done.  She  has  her  cares  on  Sunday 
as  well  as  on  Monday  and  you  can  rest.  She 
can  bear  all  the  burdens  of  life  cheerfully  if  she 
has  your  sympathy,  but  unless  she  has  your  ap- 
preciation she  is  a  beart-broken  woman  thought 
the  cares  of  life  be  few.  Alexander  would  nor 
drink  water  because  there  was  not  enough  for 
the  whole  army  and  his  soldiers  would  die  for 
him.  The  apostle  Paul  sets  the  copy  line  for 
you  to  imitate  in  loving  your  wives.  ''As  Christ 
loved  the  church,  and  gave  himself  for  it,  so 
ought  men  to  love  their  wives  as  their  own  bod- 
ies." Christ  became  poor,  and  was  persecuted 
and  died  a  martyr  for  the  church  so  you  ought 
to  sweep  the  horizon  of  your  being  and  let  noth- 
ing be  counted  too  dear  to  sacrifice  for  the  com- 


86 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


fort  of  your  wife.  My  prayer  is  that  your  mar- 
ried life  may  'be  a  psalm  of  praise  floating  up- 
ward until  the  Bridegroom  shall  come  and  you 
enter  into  the  marriage  supper  of  Moses  and 
the  Lamb,  Amen. 


87 


Model  Parents, 

Lo^eti^r©  IX. 

Train  np  a  child  in  the  way  he  should  go,  and 
when  he  is  old  he  will  not  depart  from  it. — Solomon. 

And  ye  fathers  provoke  not  your  children  to 
wrath:  but  brine:  ihera  up  in  the  nurture  and  ad- 
monition of  the  Lord. — Paul. 

And  thou  shalt  teach  them  dilhojently  unto  thy 
children,  and  shall  talk  of  them  when  thou  sittest 
in  thine  house,  and  when  thou  walkest  by  the  way, 
and  when  thou  liest  down,  and  when  thou  lisest  up. 
— Moses. 

Suffer  the  little  children  to  come  unto  me,  and 
forbid  them  not:  for  of  such  is  the  kingdom  of 
God.  Verily  T  say  unto  you  whosoever  shall  not 
receive  the  kingdom  of  God  as  a  little  child,  he 
shall  not  enter  therein.  And  he  took  them  up  in 
his  arms,  put  his  hands  upon  them,  and  blessed 
them. — Jesus, 

I  have  given  you  in  these  quotations  the 
weightiest  authority  this  world  has  ever  known 
on  our  duty  to  children.  Paul  was  the  greatest 
man  of  the  New  Testament,  and  Moses  was  the 
greatest  man  of  the  Old  Testament,  and  Sole- 
man  was  the  wisest  man  that  ever  lived,  and 


88 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


Jesus  Christ  was  the  world's  redeemer,  and  all 
these  speak  to  parents  to  teach  the  word,  to 
train  the  child,  to  bring  it  up  in  the  nurture 
and  admonition  of  the  Lord,  and  to  suiJer  them 
to  come  to  the  Saviour. 

CHILDREN  ARE  LIVING  POEMS. 

It  is  said  that  in  eighteen  hundred  and  fifty 
the  first  baby  was  born  at  Downieville,  Cali- 
fornia, and  that  it  was  the  only  babe  in  a  circle 
of  one  hundred  miles.  The  country  was  filled 
with  miners  wdio  had  left  comfortable  homes  to 
seek  gold,  but  whose  hearts  were  tender  as  they 
thought  of  the  far  away  home  with  wife  and 
child.  The  Fourth  of  July  was  being  celebrated 
at  Downieville.  The  stars  and  stripes  floated 
from  a  peeled  and  lofty  pine,  the  house  was 
crowded  with  miners;  poet,  reader  and  orator 
had  performed  well  their  part,  and  the  newly 
organized  brass  band  was  giving  in  a  boisterous 
way  some  national  anthem,  when  suddenly  tlie 
feeble  wail  of  an  infant  was  heard.  Louder 
and  louder  came  the  baby  cry.  The  band  put 
forth  new  zeal,  and  the  baby  doubled  its  vigor. 
It  was  nip  and  tuck  between  band  and  baby. 
The  young  mother  was  doing  her  best  to  hush 
the  child  when  from  the  audience  there  arose 
a  brawny  miner,  and  shaking  his  fist  at  the 
music  said,  "Hush  that  infernal  band  and  give 
the  baby  a  chance."    The  band  stopped  playing 


MODEL  PARENTS 


89 


and  never  did  stalwart  men  listen  to  sweeter 
music  than  those  exiles  from  home  and  women 
as  they  drank  in  the  tones  of  a  wailing  child. 
There  is  no  music  like  the  cooing  of  your  babe. 
What  harmony,  what  inspiration  of  heart  does 
the  sweet  singer,  God's  young  immortal  give  us. 
The  children  have  the  right  of  way  in  the  civ- 
ilized world,  and  they  shall  have  it  in  heaven. 
The  golden  streets,  and  beautiful  mansion,  and 
banks  of  the  river  of  life  will  be  like  a  Sunday 
School  anniversary  day .  My  theme  is  not  all 
poetry;  I  must  take  you  with  me  into  the  matter- 
fact  every  day  prose. 

BEGIN  EARLY  WITH  THE  CHILD. 

Parents  luive  the  children  when  they  are  like 
tlie  pure  snowflakes  untarnished  by  the  soil  and 
filth  of  earth.  The  child  starts  on  the  mother's 
bosom,  and  in  th(^  father's  arms,  and  there  is 
not  a  doubter,  or  liar,  or  infidel  among  them: 
they  all  have  full  confidence  in  their  parents, 
and  eveiy  word  of  father  or  mother  is  a  gospel 
to  them.  Some  children  are  taken  so  young 
says  Beecher,  "that  they  are  like  those  Sirring 
bulbs  which  have  their  flowers  prepared  before 
hand  and  ha\e  nothing  to  do  but  to  break 
ground  and  blossom  and  pass  away."  A  child 
eighteen  months  or  two  years  old  is  at  its  best 
to  train  for  life.  It  is  an  original  thinker,  and 
investigator.    I  heard  a  little  child  say   to  its 


90 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


mother  who  was  trying  to  get  it  to  eat  lettuce, 
'^Why  mamma  it  just  tastes  like  leaves  with 
water  on  them."  On  another  occasion  a  little 
girl  of  the  infant  class  in  Sunchij  School  said 
on  receiving  a  present  of  a  white  silk  parasol, 
''Won't  I  be  in  love  with  myself  tomorrow  at 
Sunday  School?"  This  little  thinker  who  has 
perfect  confidence  in  its  parent  learns  more  in 
a  year  than  a  young  man  in  college  for  it  can 
learn  a  language.  The  best  time  in  life  to 
teach  the  languages  is  from  three  to  eight  years 
of  age.  There  are  little  children  in  Chicago  at 
five  years  of  age  who  have  never  been  in  school 
who  can  talk  two  and  three  languages,  and  they 
have  learned  them  without  trying.  You  who 
are  seventy  and  eighty  years  of  age  remember 
better  what  happened  in  your  life  at  five  than 
at  sixty-five.  A  mother  to  amuse  her  child  will 
say  to  it,  "strike  that  ugly  horse,"  and  the  first 
lesson  is  taught  that  child  on  cruelty  to  animals? 
and  the  (jutward  act  becomes  in  time  a  reflec- 
tion of  th^  unkind  disposition  within.  We  can't 
begin  too  early.  It  is  said  that  near  on.e  of  the 
loftiest  summits  of  the  Rocky  Mountains,  ten 
thousand  feet  above  the  level  of  the  sea  there 
are  two  tiny  fountains  that  could  be  changed  in 
tlieir  direction  so  easily .  Tf  you  follow  one  of 
these  infant  streamlets  taking  an  easterly  di- 
rection from  valley  to   valley,    and    being  in 


MODEL  PARENTS 


91 


creased  by  more  than  a  thousand  tributaries, 
you  will  follow  it  to  its  ocean  lionie  in  the  Gulf 
of  Mexico  through  the  mouth  of  the  Mississ- 
ippi. Go  back  to  the  other  streamlet  and  fol- 
low it  in  a  westerly  direction,  and  it  will  lead 
you  through  the  mouth  of  the  Columbia  into 
the  bosom  of  the  great  Pacific.  To  go  from  the 
terminus  of  the  one  to  the  terminus  of  the  other 
you  must  overcome  an  ascent  of  ten  thousand 
feet,  and  travel  five  thousand  miles.  It  is  hard 
to  change  the  ocean,  or  the  mighty  current,  or 
character  when  it  becomes  positive,  and  has  a 
deep  set  and  strong  current,  but  it  was  easy  to 
change  the  infant  streamlets  when  they  had  no 
strong  bias,  or  positive  course.  Give  the  in- 
fants in  your  arms  a  bent  towards  God  and  the 
right  for  you  will  never  have  them  so  near  to 
you  again,  or  when  you  can  impress  them  so 
easily. 

TEACH  THE  CHILDREN  THE  COMMANDMENTS. 

Every  parent  ought  to  go  over  the  Sunday 
School  lesson  with  his  child  and  teach  it  the 
bible.  )[ouY  child  might  know  much  about  the 
bible  at  five  years  of  age  for  they  all  love  stories, 
and  the  bible  is  the  best  story  book  in  the  world 
for  children.  Tell  them  the  story  of  Adam  and 
Eve  in  the  garden,  about  Moses  in  the  little  bas- 
ket on  the  river,  about  the  ten  plagues,  about 
Joseph  being  sold  and  his   history   in  Egypt, 


92  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 

about  Jesus  in  the  manger,  in  the  temple,  feed- 
ing the  five  thousand,  walkir.g  on  the  sea,  rais- 
ing the  little  girl  to  life,  curing  the  b'ind  man 
and  all  about  his  crucifixion  and  resurrection. 
Make  the  bible  attractive  and  religion  beautiful. 
A  little  girl  of  four  summers  was  sick  for  a  long 
time  and  one  Sunday  evening  an  old  saint  came 
in  to  stay  with  her  and  let  her  mother  go  to 
church.  The  child  loved  stories  and  loved  to 
have  some  one  read  to  her,  so  the  good  old  chris- 
tian got  the  bible  and  read  to  her  for  an  liour 
from  Genesis,  and  when  the  mother  came  back 
the  little  one  said,  ''Oh  mamma  never  let  that 
woman  stay  with  me  again  as  long  as  you  live." 
That  little  child  dreaded  Genesis  almost  as 
much  as  the  toothache.  Teach  your  child  the 
catechism,  and  the  commandments,  and  the 
apostle's  creed,  and  she  will  never  forget  them, 
and  as  tv7o  bodies  cannot  occupy  the  same  place 
at  the  same  time  so  infidelity  and  false  isms 
can  never  occupy  the  head  and  heart  of  your 
child. 

BRING  YOUR  CHILD  TO  CHRIST. 

Many  are  opposed  to  children  joining  the 
church,  and  speak  lightly  of  it.  They  argue  a 
child  don't  understand.  If  a  child  is  not  too 
young  to  do  wrong  it  is  not  too  young  to  do 
right;  if  it  is  not  too  young  to  sin  it  is  not  too 
young  to  be  converted.    You  may  say,  "I  can't 


/ 


MODEL  PARENTS 


93 


make  children  understand  conversion,"  and  it 
is  true  they  cannot  understand  all  the  definiti- 
ons of  theological  terms  and  it  is  not  necessary. 
You  cannot  do  but  God  can :  no  parent  ever  con- 
verted a  child,  it  is  always  the  work  of  the  Holy 
Ghost  in  the  child  and  in  the  adult  there  is  no 
other  agency.  I  have  faith  in  the  prayers  of 
children.  I  believe  God  hears  the  child  when 
it  kneels  at  its  mother's  knee  and  says,  "God 
bless  papa,  and  God  bless  mamma  and  make  me 
a  good  little  girl,  Amen."  The  little  prayer 
you  said  in  childhood, 

"Now  I  lay  me  down  to  sleep, 
I  pray  the  Lord  rny  soul  to  keep  ; 
If  I  should  die  before  I  w*ake 
1  pray  the  Lord  my  soul  to  take." 

That  little  prayer  has  followed  many  a  rough 
and  wayw^ard  man  and  led  him  to  the  Saviour. 
Let  me  give  you  a  picture  of  a  mother  teaching 
her  child  to  pray. 

'*Now  I  lay  me" — say  it  darling; 
''Lay  me,"  lisped  che  tin\^  lips 
of  ray  daughter.  kr  eeHn^,  binding, 
O'er  her  folded  finger-tips. 

"Down  to  sleep" — "to  sleep,"  she  murmured, 
And  the  curly  head  drooped  low  ; 
"I  pray  the  Lord,"  I  gently  added, 
"You  can  say  it  all  I  know." 


94 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


''Pray  the  Lord'' — the  words  came  taintly. 
Fainter  still — ''My  soul  to  keep." 
Then  the  tired  head  fairly  nodi^ed, 
And  the  child  was  fast  asleep. 

But  the  dewy  eyes  half  opened 
When  1  clasped  her  to  my  l)reast, 
And  the  dear  voice  softly  whispered 
* 'Mamma,  God  knows  all  Uie  rest.'' 

Oh,  the  trustintj,  sweet  confic^ing, 
Of  the  child  heart:  Would  that  1 
Thus  mi^ht  trust  my  heavenly  Father, 
He  who  hears  my  feeDJest  cry. 

Parents,  God  hears  your  cry  as  uuich  as  he  does 
the  ripest  saint. 

THE  BIBLE  TEACHES  CHILD-CONVERSION 

When  Samuel  was  a  child  God  called  hiniy 
and  so  he  did  Josiah,  and  John  the  Baptist  was 
filled  with  the  Holy  Ghost  from  his  mother's 
womb.  He  was  set  apart  it  is  true  for  a  sacred 
work,  but  it  shows  God's  pow^^r  with  children. 
Jesus  took  the  little  ones  up  in  his  arms  and 
blessed  them,  and  upon  another  occasion  when 
they  sang  his  praises  he  said,  ''Out  of  the 
mouths  of  babes  and  sucklings  thou  hast  per- 
fected praise."  Let  the  children  come  into  the 
church  in  full  membership,  and  who  dare  stand 
in  the  church-door  and  keep  them  out  when 
Jesus  says,  ''Suffer  the  little  children  to  come 
unto  me  and  forbid  them    not."    He  rebuked 


MODEL    PARENTS  95 

the  disciples  over  eighteen  hundred  years  ag^o, 
and  by  his  own  eternal  word  he  rebukes  them 
today.  May  Grod  speed  the  day  when  the  chil- 
dren shall  never  get  out  of  the  church. 

THEY  won't  forget  IN  AFTER  YEARS. 

Solomon  says  they  will  not  depart  when  they 
are  old.  If  the  child  is  allowed  to  select  the 
largest  apple  on  the  plate,  or  the  juciest  bit  of 
steak  it  will  grow  to  be  selfish,  and  the  school, 
or  society  must  train  it  for  you,  or  it  will  be  at 
a  great  disadvantage.  Teach  it  right  and  it  will 
not  forget  your  instructions  in  after  years.  A 
son  buried  his  mother  when  he  was  in  humble 
circumstances,  and  then  he  became  wealthy, 
he  re nioved  his  mother's  sacred  dust  to  his 
splendid  lot,  and  in  reburying  tlie  precious  dust 
he  thought  of  his^  childliofvd  home,  and  his 
mothf^^-'s  prayers  and  w otidered  why  God  had 
not  answ^M'ed  th^nn,  and  as  the  sacred  memories 
of  his  ch;!dho)(l  home  crowd.'d  U{3on  him,  he 
was  c;)nvicted  of  sin,  and  hf'f')re  he  retired  that 
night  hp  surrendered  Ins  life'  to  Je-^u;^  Ohrist. 
O  you  mothers,  you  may  hnve  wjiited  n  long 
time,  but  ynuY  prayers  are  burning  at  the  throne 
and  God  will  answer  them. 

HAS  YOUR  CHILD  EVER  HKARD  YOU  PRAY? 

Is  th^re  a  parent  within  re  my  voice 

or  pen  whose  children  iuis  ]^e•v^'r  lieard  him  pray? 
Norman  McLeud  sai<.l  he  tried  to  urge    a  me- 


96 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


chailic  to  have  family  prayer.  One  day  litg 
rushed  into  his  study  and  burst  into  tears  and 
said,  ''You  remember  that  girl,  Sir,"  ''She  was 
my  only  child,  she  died  suddenly  this  morning. 
I  hope  she  has  gone  to  God,  and  if  so  she  can 
^ell  him  thai  which  now  breaks  my  heart,  that 
she  never  heard  a  prayer  from  her  father's  lips. 
Oh  that  she  were  with  me  but  one  day  again!" 
Oh,  you  fathers,  erect  family  altars,  and  by  holy 
example  teach  your  children  the  way  to  God. 


tlBRARV 
'  THE 

UNIVERSITY  OF  ILLINOIS 


GRACE,  RUBY  AND  XEAL  TAXQUARY  Denver,  Col. 


97 


Training  Children, 

Children  are  what  the  mothers  are. — Landor. 

I  »m  the  mother  ot  an  immortal  being.  God  be 
merciful  to  me  a  sinner. — Mary  Fuller. 

Take  this  child  away  and  nurse  it  for  me,  and  I 
will  give  thee  thy  ^  ages. — Pharoah's  Daughter. 

I  see  but  one  way  in  which  we  can  rid  ourselves 
of  rascals,  and  that  is  to  stop  raising  them. — Dr. 
Holland. 

O  child  !  O  new-born  denizen 

Of  life's  great  city  ;  on  thy  head 
The  glory  of  the  morn  is  shed, 

Like  a  cei(>stial  benizen ! 

Here  at  the  portal  thou  woulds't  stand, 
And  with  thy  little  hand 

Thou  openest  the  mysterious  gate 

Into  the  future's  undiscovered  land. 

— Longfellow. 

There  are  no  fl jwers  in  all  the  world  like  the 
olive  plants  of  the  home. 

They  are  idols  of  hearts  and  of  households, 

They  are  angels  of  God  in  disguise ; 

His  sunlight  still  sleeps  in  their  tresses, 

His  glory  still  sleeps  in  their  eyes. 

Oh  those  truants  from  home  and  frotr  heaven, 

They  have  made  me  more  manly  and  wild, 


98 


MARKIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


And  I  know  how  Jesns  coiiul  rcnrkon 

The  kintjdoni  of  God  to  a  child    — Dickensoo. 

We  live  in  the  child  millpDium,  in  I  he  age 
when  children  are  appreciated  aiul  loved. 
China  and  Indiri  in  their  most  sacred  books, 
and  Greece  and  Rome  say  but  little  ab  )ut  chil- 
dren. Homer,  Zenophan,  Virgil  ajid  Heroditus 
scarcely  mention  them.  The  bible  brings  them 
to  the  front  in  the  example  of  the  Lord  Jesus, 
who  became  a  child,  in  Moses  the  redeemer  of 
the  Israelites,  in  the  little  Hebrew  maid  who. 
carried  the  gospel  to  the  great  Captain,  in  Sam- 
uel who  was  called  of  God  in  his  childhood,  and 
in  the  whole  book  of  Proverbs  which  was  writ- 
ten for  youth.  Craft  says,  ''The  ethics  of  Chris- 
tianity startled  the  world  with  the  new  doctrine 
that  to  develop  the  greatest  manhood  we  must 
become  as  little  children.  If  any  other  system 
of  ethics  had  searched  for  the  model  of  man- 
hood it  would  have  presented  stoical  firmness, 
bold  indifference  to  circumstances,  or  some 
other  rough,  stern  virtue  as  our  model,  but 
Christ  as  represented  in  a  beautiful  painting  at 
Edinburg  lays  his  hand  on  the  head' of  a  little 
child  as  it  rests  trustingly  on  its  mother's  knee 
in  the  midat  of  his  disciples,  and  says,  "except 
ye  become  as  little  children  ye  .can  in  nowise 
enter  the  kingdom  of  heaven."  If  such  is  the 
appreciation  of  Christ  with  what   care  should 


TEAINING  CHILDREN. 


99 


we  nurse  and  train  them  for  him. 

^      GIVE  THE  CHILD  A  GOOD  BODY. 

Tt  is  the  duty  of  parents  to  give  the  best  con- 
stitution possible  to  their  children.  We  can- 
not please  God  and  not  take  good  care  of  the 
b3dy.  The  bible  puts  dignity  on  the  body.  It 
says,  "Study  me  tor  I  am  fearfully  and  wonder- 
fully made;"  the  body  is  to  be  presented  a  liv- 
ing sacrifice,  a  fit  temple  for  the  Holy  Ghost  to 
dwell  in,  it  is  to  be  raised  an  incorruptible  and 
glorified  body,  and  God  shall  fashion  it  like  un- 
to his  own  glorious  body.  If  God  puts  such 
honor  on  the  body  how  should  we  honor  and 
care  for  it.  A  temperate,  pure  and  holy  life  is 
necessary  in  the  pare  Tit  to  give  the  best  consti- 
tution to  the  children.  If  parents  sin  against 
natural  law,  and  abuse  their  own  bodies  it  will 
be  visited  down  upon  their  children.  The  best 
air,  food,  clothing  and  exercise  are  necessary 
for  ur  children.  S  nne  X3arents  give  soothing 
syrup  to  their  children  when  they  are  fretful  to 
quiet  them,  and  they  form  a  principle  in  the 
cliild  that  is  seen  in  all  smokers,  opium  eaters 
and  drunkards.  They  have  an  uneasy  sensa- 
tion like  the  fretting  child  and  to  quiet  that 
sensation  they  resort  to  some  narcotic.  The 
soothing  syrup  principle  is  the  foundation  for 
the  drunkard.  If  the  body  is  master  then  are 
we  animals.    If  green  cucumb^'rs,   and  mince 


100  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


and  rhubarb  pies,  and  olives,  and  hard  boiled 
eg^s,  and  a  crazy  dinner  generally  goes  into  the 
little  stall — the  child's  stomach,  internal  war  is 
declared  and  you  send  for  the  pliysician,  a  fowl 
would  swallow  gravel,  and  a  man  ought  to  take 
a  tonic  of  sawing  wood.  There  are  eating 
drunkards  as  well  as  drinking  drunkards.  A 
good  body  with  good  nerves  is  an  essential  to 
the  best  mind,  and  success  in  life. 

DEVELOP  THE  MIND. 

Socrates  used  to  say,  that  if  he  could  get  up 
to  the  highest  place  in  Athens  he  would  lift  up 
his  voice  and  proclaim,  "What  mean  ye  fellow 
citizens  that  ye  turn  every  stone  to  scrape 
wealth  together,  and  take  so  little  care  of  your 
children  to  whom  one  day  ye  must  relinquish 
all."  Our  public  schools  are  the  palladium  of 
the  republic,  and  the  great  university  for  all 
the  children,  and  every  child  ought  to  have  fif- 
teen years  in  our  public  schools.  No  longer 
should  any  parent  or  teacher  with  their  cast 
iron  hand  cramp  the  brain  of  the  child  into  any 
set  groove  in  life.  Give  the  child  all  the  ad- 
vantages of  the  best  mental  discipline,  and  then 
aid  it  m  the  best  choice  for  life.  Develop  the 
man  for  the  man  is  greater  than  the  orator,  or 
artist,  or  philosopher,  and  in  proportion  as  he 
is  honest,  and  strong,  and  well  developed,  in 
proportion  shall  all  else  be  great.    The  great 


TRAINING  CHILDREN 


101 


object  of  our  schools  is  to  grow  men,  wise  men^ 
noble  men.  There  was  a  time  when  teachers 
destroyed  the  originality  of  the  child  and  made 
the  scholars  all  toe  the  same  crack,  or  chalk  line 
intellectually  as  well  as  physically,  but  a  grand- 
er day  has  dawned.  In  heathen  lands  many  of 
the  weak  children  were  destroyed  as  soon  as 
born.  This  was  true  in  Sparta  and  Rome  and 
Grecian  cities.  Christianity  has  given  the  weak 
a  fair  chance.  Byron  had  a  club  foot,  Alexan- 
der Pope  was  so  small  that  he  required  a  high 
chair  to  eat  his  meals,  and  Sir  Isaac  Newton 
was  among  the  frailest  when  born.  Burton 
says,  "how  many  deformed  princes  and  orators, 
and  philosophers  could  I  reckon  up,  and  many 
of  them  stand  out  on  the  pages  of  history  im- 
mortal, wh  o  without  education  would  have  been 
unknown."  The  children  require  better  teach- 
ers the  first  four  years  than  at  any  other  time 
in  life  for  this  is  the  period  when  they  imitate 
more  than  any  other  time.  A  teacher  who  uses 
slang,  or  deports  himself  improperly  in  any  re- 
spect is  unfit  for  a  teacher  in  the  primary  grade. 

TRAIN  THEM  MORALLY. 

Parents  are  responsible  for  the  training  of 
their  children  morally.  When  your  children 
were  baptised  you  promised  to  teach  them  the 
nature  of  the  sacrament  of  Baptism,  the  Lord's 
prayer,  the  ten  commandments,  the  Apostle's 


102 


MAKRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


creed,  the  catechism  and  all  other  things  which 
a  christian  ought  to  believe  and  know  for  his 
soul's  health.  The  work  of  bringing  the  child 
to  the  Savior,  and  instructing  it  in  the  ways  of 
holy  living  is  the  plain  duty  of  the  parent  above 
the  minister  and  Sunday  school  teaclier,  and 
God  will  hold  the  parent  responsible.  This 
work  is  too  sacred  to  be  neglected,  or  to  be  rel- 
egated to  any  one  else. 

TRAIN  THEM  BY  GOOD  EXAMPLE. 

"The  whole  is  greater  than  its  parts"  is  an 
axiom  in  Euclid,  and  if  the  whole  life  gives  the 
falsehood  to  the  lips  then  the  life  will  be  be- 
lieved. Josh  Billings  never  said  a  truer  thing 
than  when  he  said,  in  whatever  way  you  want 
your  children  to  go  "skirmish  ahead  -that  way 
yourselves."  The  greatest  teacher  is  a  consist- 
ent and  genuine  life.  If  a  lady  smiles  blandly 
on  her  neighbor  at  the  door  and  says,  "I  was 
just  homesick  to  see  you,"  and  the  moment  she 
leaves  continues  on  another  =  key  "Well  she 
riever  knows  when  to  leave,  and  she  \h  a  tartar," 
that  woman  has  taught  her  children  a  lesson  on 
hypocrisy  that  a  month  of  Sand  lys  won't  undo. 
I  have  known  parents  to  use  every  possible  de- 
vice to  get  their  children  to  tell  them  something 
they  did  that  was  wron^r  and  then  punish  them 
severely  for  it,  and  the  next  time  the  children 
would  lie  about  it  because  they  feared  the  whip- 


TRAINING  CHILDREN 


103 


ping,  and  I  think  it  is  a  hopeful  sign  in  a  child 
when  it  knows  enough  to  lie  under  such  cir- 
cumstances. That  is  one  way  to  teach  a  child 
how  to  lie.  I  have  known  church  members 
who  always  talked  about  begging  when  they 
were  asked  to  contribute  to  the  cause  of  God, 
and  who  would  search  with  elegant  silk  clad 
hand  in  an  expensive  pocket  book  for  a  copper 
cent  for  missions,  or  the  support  of  the  church 
and  then  wonder  why  their  children  don't  take 
more  interest  in  church.  You  can't  deceive  an 
American  boy  ten  years  of  age  on  a  counterfeit 
dollar  coin,  and  the  parent  is  the  best  read,  and 
the  most  correctly  interpreted  coin  in  all  the 
world.  A  mere  hollow,  matter-of-convenience 
religion  never  made  anybody  respect  the  church 
of  Jesus  Christ.  I  hope  you  will  not  think  me 
severe  today  when  I  am  illustrating  a  great 
principle,  and  exposing  a  great  sham  that  is 
damning  the  children  of  many  homes  as  regards 
the  church  of  the  living  God.  "Like  parent 
iike  child."  It  is  said  that  Byron's  mother  was 
proud,  ill-tempered  and  violent,  what  was  By- 
ron? Sir  Walter  Scott's  mother  was  well  edu- 
cated and  a  great  lover  of  poetry  and  paintings 
what  was  Scott?  Washington's  mother  was 
pious,  pure  and  true,  what  was  Washington? 
Wesley's  mother  was  learned,  pious,  and  had 
great  executive  ability,  what  was  John  Wesley? 


104 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


A  worker,  a  saint,  an  organizer.  It  is  the  hon- 
est, real,  true  hfe  that  we  h've  before  our  chil- 
dren that  crystalizes  into  ^ood  resolutions, 
grand  character  and  precious  memories  that 
will  follow  them  as  ^^uardian  angels  as  long  as 
they  live.  If  I  am  to  loose  either  the  confidence 
of  my  church  or  my  child  let  it  be  the  confi- 
dence of  my  people.  Many  of  you  feel  that  the 
old  home  and  its  precious  memories  have  saved 
you,  and  are  ready  to  testify, 

'*And  if  I  e'er  in  heaven  appear, 
A  mother's  holy  prayer, 
A  mother's  hand  and  gentle  tear, 
That  pointed  to  a  Savior-  dear. 
Have  led  the  wanderer  there." 

Do  we  appreciate  the  golden  opportunities  of 
life,  the  great  responsibilities  that  rest  upon 
parents,  and  the  untold  blessings  of  children? 

Ah !  what  would  the  world  b'^  to  us 
If  the  children  were  no  more? 
We  should  dread  the  desert  hehirid  us 
More  than  the  dark  before. 

What  the  leaves  are  to  the  forest, 
With  light  and  air  for  food, 
Ere  their  sweet  and  tender  juices 
Have  hardened  into  wood, — 

That  to  the  world  are  children  ; 
Throufjli  them  it  feeU  the  glow 
Of  a  Inight  and  sunnier  ehmate 
Than  reaches  the  trunks  below. 


TRAINING  CHILDREN  105 


Ye  are  better  than  all  the  ballads 

'I  hat  fver  were  sung  or  said; 

For  ye  are  living  poems 

And  all  the  rest  are  dead. — Longfellow 

It  is  heaven  in  your  heart  to  meet  the  clasp 
of  your  cooing  babe  at  eventide,  and  to  look 
forward  to  that  babe  as  the  strong  staff  on  which 
you  shall  lean  in  old  a^e;  but  it  is  more  divine 
to  nurse  that  child  for  God  and  his  glory. 

YOUR  WAGES. 

When  you  are  weary  with  life's  burdens,  and 
the  care  of  your  little  child  it  will  be  good 
wages  to  hear  God  say  in  your  approving  con- 
science, '*Well  done"  when  you  have  toiled  in 
the  factory,  or  store,  or  laundry  to  educate  your 
child,  it  will  be  good  wages  to  hear  God  say, 
^'Well  done,"  when  your  boy  has  been 
won  a  trophy  for  the  Master  through 
your  prayers,  it  will  be  grand  wages 
to  heat-  God  say,  **VVell  done,"  when 
you  turn  back  from  your  dying  pillow  to 
take  a  farewell  look  at  your  daughter  with  her 
little  ones  cliiiginu'  to  her,  and  reflecting  the 
image  of  the  Master  it  will  be  joy  unspeakable 
to  hear  Gcd  say,  "Well  done,"  and  once  more 
when  you  st«nd  before  the  throne  and  gaze  on 
the  painting  which  you  have  helped  to  finish, 
and  which  is  to  adorn  the  galleries  of  the  ^kif  s 
for  all  Ihe  jig(8  it  will  be  glorious  to  hear  God 


iOS  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 

say  in  the  presence  of  the  worlds,  ''well  done 
good  and  faithful."  May  you  hear  God  say  to- 
day, "Take  this  child  away  and  nurse  it  for  me, 
und  Iw ill  give  .thee  thy  wages." 


LIBRARY 
'  THE 

UNIVERSITY  OF  ILLINOIS 


WALTER  El'RV  WYATT,  Pkoria,  III. 


107 


Mission  of  the  Child  in  the  Home. 

LD^cstirir©  XI. 

And  a  little  child  shull  lead  tbeiii  — Isaiah. 

A  hahe  ia  the  iiouse  is  a  well  s[)ring  of  pleasure. 
^Tupper. 

A  Bweet  new  hlorssom  (»f  [Tiimanitv, 
Fresh  fnih^n  frotn  God's  own  home  to  flower 
ifU  earth.  — Massey. 

A  chernh  mi  rht  mi-take  oar  rosy  hoy 

For  a  reposint^  mate:  — Bishop  Coxe. 

At  the  <ame  tiaie  came  the  disciples  unto  Jesus, 
sayii!^'.  Who  is  the  gr(*atesl  in  the  lvino<lom  of 
hoaven?  And  Jcsu^  caile(^  a  little  child  unto  him, 
and  set  him  in  the  midsl  of  them;  and  said,  verilj 
I  say  \M\U)  yon.  ♦•xcept  ye  he  converted,  and  he- 
crnne  as  little  children,  ye  siiall  noi  enter  into  tho 
kino(i()in  of  heaven.  Whosoever  therefore  shall 
hnrahle  hitnsclf  as  tliis  little  chdtl,  the  same  is 
greatest  in  the  kinj^dom  of  lu^aven.  And  whoso 
•  shall  receive  one  such  little  child  m  m}  name  re- 
ceive .h  me.  Bnt  whoso  sliall  offend  one  of  these 
little  (mes  that  believe  in  me,  it  were  belter  for 
him  that  a  millstone  w^ere  hanored  about  his  neck, 
and  that  he  were  drowned  in  the  depth  of  the  «ea. 
— Jesus. 


I  have  beard  a  p^reat  many  seraious   on  the 


108 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


love  and  sacrifice  of  parents  for  their  children 
but  I  have  never  heard  one  on  the  inflaence  of 
thechikloii  th^^  p  treats,  the  home  and  the 
world.  My  subject  this  morning  is  the  mission 
of  the  child.  Of  aU  the  aiii^els  tliat  ever  came 
from  heaven,  of  all  the  evans^els  that  ever  set 
the  gospel  to  sweetest  music,  of  all  the  thrill- 
ing orators  that  ever  swayed  the  multitudes 
there  are  none  so  charming,  so  divine,  so  power- 
ful over  the  human  heart  as  the  little  child  in 
the  mother's  arms,  or  toddling  at  her  side. 
Over  and  over  again  have  I  said  with  Charles 
M.  Dickenson  as  I  see  them  nestling  in  the 
mother's  bosom.,  or  dancing  holy  innocence 
upon  her  knee,  '*And  1  know  how  Jesus  could 
liken  the  kingdom  of  God  to  a  child." 

THE  CHILD  BRINGS  THE  GOSPEL  OF  LOVE  TO  THE 
HOME. 

Everything  gives  way  for  the  little  visitor  in 
the  home,  and  it  waits  for  no  welcome.  Great 
men  come  with  mighty  arguments  and  persuas 
ive  ability  to  compel  us  to  aid  some  charitable 
institution,  and  consider  some  laudable  enter- 
prise, but  God  has  armed  the  little  visitor  with 
greater  power,  and  without  trying  it  is  at  once 
master  of  the  situation,  and  has  won  the  right 
of  way  to  all  that  fondest  hearts  can  devise  for 
it.  The  very  heart  of  the  home  is  the  cradel, 
and  there  is  no  factor  in  the  world  so  potent  as 


MISSION  OF  THE  CHILD  IN  THE  HOME  109 


chiicL 

IT  IS  NO  BURDEN. 

T  have  heard  some  people  speak  of  children 
as  being  troublesome,  b^.t  it  was  either  some  one 
who  was  never  a  parent,  or  who  never  ought  to 
have  been  one.  The  child  is  the  loadstone  that 
hastens  the  father  home,  and  there  is  no  pic- 
ture more  charming  in  life  than  the  little  one 
watching  and  running  to  meet  the  father  at  the 
father  at  the  close  of  the  day.  Some  of  these 
little  ones  at  two  and  three  learn  his  footsteps 
and  their  hearts  leap  with  joy  at  his  coming.  I 
saw  a  young  father  with  his  first  born  in  his 
arms  tossing  it  up  and  down  in  rapturous  de- 
light and  I  said  what  a  real  picture  of  life.  So- 
ciety is  largely  a  masquerade,  and  often  a  dress 
parade  while  the  home  is  ever  the  real  life. 
Society  says  and  acts  many  formal  and  mechan- 
ical and  lifeless  things.  A  gentleman  some 
time  since  had  an  old  friend  come  to  see  him 
who  had  been  absent  for  a  long  time  and  who 
was  a  stranger  to  the  telephone.  He  told  him 
be  could  hear  his  wife's  voice  five  miles  away 
and  his  friend  could  not  believe  it  so  he  rang 
her  up  and  told  her  that  their  old  friend  Mr. 
So  and  So  had  returned  and  asked  him  to  come 
to  the  phone  and  hear  her  talk  five  miles  away. 
Just  as  he  put  his  ear  to  the  phone  she  said, 
am  glad  he  is  back  again  but  I  do  hope  that  be 


no  MVR^IAGIi:  AND  ''TnK  HOMK 

will  not  come  up  tor  dinner. S  >ciety  is  un- 
natural and  often  poses  l)efore  the  world  behind 
a  friise  faee  wliUe  the  home  life  is  always  the 
real,  i^eunine  iife.  The  mother  sits  in  the  even- 
tide beside  tlie  swin<j^in^'  crib  and  pictures  out 
for  her  little  one  a  life  so  pare  and  fair.  She 
is  a  prophetess  paintin<^  with  rarest  skill  and 
most  delicate  touch  the  splendid  aiid  virtuous 
and  noble  son  or  d  iu'^'hter  of  twenty  years  to 
come.  She  is  a  happy  woman  and  never  more 
so  than  when  the  little  on^s  are  all  gathered 
ftround  her.  Tiiere  are  no  furaishino-s  nr  pleas- 
res  that  can  compare  with  the  little  child. 

*'Ves,  i  know  there  are  t-tdns  on  my  carpet, 
The.  traces  of  nmdily  boots; 

And  I  see  your  fair  tMpe>tr\  jj^lowmof. 
All  spoUess  with  blossoms  ami  fruits. 

And  I  know  that  i^iv  walls  are  disfiijured 
Willi  ()rinls  of  small  finof^^'s  and  hands; 
And  thai  your  own  lionsehoid  must  truly 
Inimmaculale  parity  stands. 

And  I  know  that  my  parlor  is  littered 
With  many  old  treasures  and  toys  ; 
While  your  own  is  in  daintiest  order, 
Unharmed  by  the  presence  of  boys. 

And  I  know' that  my  room  is  invaded 
Quite  boldly  at  all  hours  of  day; 
While  3^ou'^sit  in  your. unmolested 
And  dream  the  soft  quiet  awaj^ ; 


MISSION  OF  THE  CHILD  IN  THE  ROME  111 


Yes,  I  know  there  yre  iouv  little  bedsides 
Wlit^re  I  Hi  list  stasxl  watciifiii  eacii  iii^  hl, 
\N'liilH  y(,u  <^()<)iit  id  your  oarrirj^e. 
And  flash  in  3'oiir  dresses  co  bright, 

Tsow,  1  think  I'm  a  neat  little  woman; 
J  like  n\\  house  orderly,  too; 
And  Vni  fond  (A  all  <lainty  beiongin«:s  ; 
Yet  I  \^ouhl  not  change  places  witii  you. 

N<»!  keep  \-our  fair  home  vvitli  its  order, 
its  freedom  from  bother  and  noise. 
And  keep  yourov  n  fancitul  h  i^ure. 
Hut  give  me  my  four  s})lendid  boys/' 

THE  LITTLE  ONES  DEVELOP  YOU. 

They  ^ive  a  meaui uu-  to  life  and  teach  3'ou 
the  way  to  sacrifice.  Jesus  never  could  have 
been  the  Christ  witii  out  ureat  sacrifice,  the 
word  mother  touches  tlie  hearts  of  the  vilest 
into  tenderness,  and  the  one  thing  that  has 
made  the  name  so  dear  is  sacrilice.  The  child 
in  the  home  discovers  a  new  world  for  you  and 
you  are  lifted  out  of  selfishness  in  holy  self  de- 
nial, and  hence  your  characters  are  grandly  de- 
veloped. The  only  thing  that  will  stand  to 
your  credit  in  the  eternal  world  will  be  th^  sac- 
rifices you  have  made,  and  that  is  the  only 
thing  that  makes  stalwarts  here.  You  toil  more 
ardently  for  your  child,  you  sacrifice  more  su- 
};.remely,  you  develop  more  grandly,  you  sympa- 
thiVe  more  tenderly  willi  children  and  parentis 


112 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


and  the  home  and  all  because  God  has  blessrd 
you  with  a  child.  The  teacher  that  has  taught 
you  most  patience,  that  has  awakened  in  you 
the  purest  and  the  divinest  love,  that  has  made 
you  stand  a  hand  breadth  higher  in  real  man- 
hood and  in  the  kingdom  of  heaven  is  your  dar- 
ling child.  These  little  ones  have  compelled 
you  to  be  more  exemplary,  and  a  thousand  times 
the  thought  has  crowded  in  upon  you,  "I  must 
set  a  better  example  before  my  children."  They 
have  led  you  to  the  Sunday  School  and  into  the 
church,  and  made  you  more  manly  and  heroic, 
and  into  the  raging  flood  would  you  plunee,  and 
into  the  scorching  flames  would  you  rush  to 
save  your  child.  Let  your  house  catch  fire 
while  the  little  one  is  sleeping  within  and  at 
once  you  feel  that  your  nerves  are  steel,  and 
you  are  possessed  with  a  strength  that  is  super- 
natural and  like  Samson  you  could  bear  away 
the  pillars  of  the  building  to  save  your  child. 
O  how  these  little  ones  have  inspired  us,  and 
blessed  us,  and  what  a  benediction  their  velvet 
t')uch  and  imj)licit  faith  have  been  to  us.  Go 
home  and  thank  God  over  and  over  again  for 
your  child,  and  as  you  look  into  its  face  Isaiah's 
prophecy  is  fulfilled  in  your  heart,  "A  little 
cliild  shall  lead  them."  Many  of  oui  little  ones 
hfive  lelt  us  years  ago,  and  the  only  ]  ath  they 
knew  'Hs  that  whicli  leads  from    the  mother's 


MISSION  OF  THE  CHILD  IN  THE  HOME  11P> 


anus  up  to  the  arms  of  God/' 

THEY  DID  NOT  LIVE  IN  VAIN, 

How  many  say  with  David  though  he  cannot 
come  to  me  yet  I  shall  q;o  to  him.  A  wicked 
fatlier  lost  his  infant  and  years  after  he  picked 
up  the  tiny  shoes  and  his  heart  melted  withiia 
him,  and  the  little  shoes  walked  right  into  his 
heart.  A  parent  lost  his  boy  and  he  asked  his 
pastor  how  it  was  if  God  were  all  good  that  he 
took  his  boy  when  he  wanted  to  keep  him  so 
much?  Tlie  pastor  answered  it  w^ith  this  illus- 
tration. He  said  there  was  a  beautiful  fold  and 
the  kind  shepherd  tried  to  get  the  sheep  in,  and 
they  would  not  go  in.  At  last  he  took  one  of 
the  little  lambs  up  in  his  arms  and  went  in  and 
the  bleating  sheep  followed  him.  That  beauti- 
ful fold  is  heaven,  that  kind  shepherd  is  Christ 
and  that  little  lamb  in  his  bosom  is  your  child 
and  many  have  followed  the  little  lambs  into 
the  kingdom  of  heaven. 

THE  LITTLE  ONES  ARE  ONLY  TRANSPLANTED. 

They  are  safe  and  have  every  opportunity  of 
earth  multiplied  by  infinily  for  development. 
Jacob  went  down  into  Egypt  and  knew  his  boy 
Joseph  though  he  had  changed  with  the  respon- 
sibilities of  life,  and  so  your  child  will  grow  and 
reach  up  in  the  stature  of  a  glorified  manhood, 
but  it  will  still  be  your  child.  Nearly  one- 
fourth  of  all  the  children  born  died  in  infaacy 


114  MU^Hi..'       AND    THi2  HOME 

and  I'm  not  sm-:  r:::-n  thnt  the  recnrd  renrlp, 
"that  of  Bucli  is  ilic  l^in^^dom  (^f  lieaveii."  How 
precious  is  the  clu'isuaiL  liope? 

"Bold  I \' :  tin  f)  pair  ;h d  din. 
Berieai.h  ihiM  .-L  ni'  fdur  inf:inL.>'  ashes  lie; 
Say,  art'  Hu-y  h  st.  orsMVf'd? 
If  deatlTs  b}'  sin    tJicv  sinti'd, — 

For  t  hi'v  he  lie  re  ; 
If  Henvon'p  by  -vf^rks.  in  Hv'Mven 

l'he\'  c.'Ui'r  :-i|>|)far. 
Reason,  ah  :  how  (Ippravcd  ; 
Kevere  the  Biirh''&  sar-red  pa<re  , 

Thv.  knot's  11  ntied  : 
They  dle<i,  for  Adaiu  siniu'd  • 

Tiiey  live,  for  Jesus  died.'* 

THEY  BLESSED  YOU  IN  THEIR  SHORT  STAY- 

They  kindled  in  your  hearts  a  hjve  which  you 
never  would  have  known  witiumt  them,  God 
has  enriclied  you  and  prepared  you  in  the  furn- 
ace of  affliction  to  be  an  an^el  of  mercy  to  sym- 
pathize wdtli  the  broken  hearted,  and  to  bind 
lip  their  wounds.  No  one  can  felh)wship  with 
a  motherless  child  unless  they  have  been  so 
afflicted  themselves,  and  you  cannot  sympatlnze 
with  parents  who  have  buried  their  dearest 
hopes  unless  ''your  saddened  thouirhts  go  wan- 
dering to  a  little  quiet  grave."  We  shall  be 
richer  in  purity  and  sympathy  and  cliarac^er  as 
long  as  we  live  because  they  ever  blessed  us 
with  their  presence. 


THE  MOUKL  ho:: 
*'An  Hnir<^!  '"s:!!*'  to  our  h  -^^hold, 

I  fJ  \  iu"  i'uV'V  <'.i\>>  of  >|)ri  1,  ■  . 

And  iifi^  WHS  '\\^  ('Vvm-  \  i  inn  . 

It.  w:!S  l.ot  Mil  jif'iifi  of  OM ;  <  .'ii^SS, 
Bill  :i  lj"iMU  rohiMl  ill  w  . 

A\\'\  ;!rrus!'l  him  seriiu-o  i,-.^  hover, 
A  it;iio  i>i  sac're<(  liiiiii. 

Ai5ii  I  ••()  vvliMo  roher]  angel 

>\  li  \    !'  J  V','  \  <  111  (MKJM'  l.<  M  |;{  \-  ? 

Wh  -jt,  !  >.'  t  II  t  !  f ;)  !  ini-,>i.t||  ('f  UHTCy 

.-stMil,  \our  I'fi'l  (iii->>  way  ?" 

'Tvc  ('  )\v\*'  f..r  nfi)'  of  ih(^  cliildreri 
M  \'  .\!a-ii' f  h  »s  sent  h'lr  oowti, 

'i'v)  Jsi'L  ia  hi:?  holy  erowii." 

I  followed  his  tonder  ojlances  • 
As  \  \\('\'  rt'^lt'd  lovingly 
First  u}M)ii  Olive,  then  Alice, 
Tiun  tlie  baby  on  my  kuec. 

Axnd.  he  sai'l,  ''There  are  many  trials 
Scattered  along  throngh  life, 
'J'here  are  ina»iy  sore  temptations, 
There  is  much  of  toil  and  strife; 

Bnt  those  who  are  in  the  kingdom 
Are  safe  fr<^m  all  these  harms, 
I  think  I'll  l)ear  the  baby 
Up  tj  my  Master's  arms. 


116 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


So  he  laid  on  his  breast  onr  darling, 
And  prepared  to  take  his  flight. 
But  he  whispered  a  word  of  blessing, 
Before  he  passed  from  sight, 

And  over  our  striekened  household, 
And  over  our  heart's  bereft, 
And  over  the  grave  is  resting 
The  blessing  the  angel  left/' 

Great  blessings  have  they  left  us,  blessings 
of  sacred  memories,  blessings  of  tender  hearts, 
l)lessings  of  joyous  hopes,  blessings  of  ^reat 
sympathies,  a  thousand  blessings  as  pure  as 
love  and  high  as  heaven;  may  God  help  us  to 
appreciate  the  blessings  these  ministering  an- 
i>;el8  brought  to  our  homes  and  hearts,  Amen, 


in 


The  Model  Home. 

**God  setteth  the  solitary  in  families  *' 

There  is  no  place  like  home. — Howard  Payne. 

Home  is  the  grandest  of  all  institutions. — Spur- 
geon. 

'The  hand  that  rocks  the  cradle  moves  the  world.'' 

I  value  this  delicious  home-feeling  ?.s  one  of  the 
choicest  gifts  a  parent  can  bestow. — Washing^oa 
Irvine:. 

"The  eyes  of  a  child  are  sweeter  than  any  hymn  we  have  siing" 
And  wiser  than  any  sermon  is  the  lisp  of  a  childish  tongue.'" 

It  is  a  woman,  and  only  a  woman,  —  a  woman  all 
by  herself,  if  she  likes,  and  without  any  mnn  to 
help  her, — who  can  turn  a  house  into  a  home. — 
Cobbe. 

The  home  is  a  place  enclosed  by  four  walls 
where  the  interests  are  identical,  and  yet  honses 
and  fields  and  luxuries  never  make  the  iriea 
borne.  Wherever  two  hearts  are  united  in  love, 
whether  they  live  uuon  barren  mountain's  peak 
or  on  the  western  prairies  in  a  dnu:  out.  or  alon*^ 
the  beach  in  a  fisher's  hut  th  m  place  is  home. 


118 


MAU  tm;{:  ii  >  i 


Amoao:  the  birds  Ko];in  R;^(]l)rea--  fv'-m 
his  soulliern  sojtnini  niid  huiidr.  u-  au  ye.'ir  to 
3' cmr  ill  the  same  purcii  in  bis  iioiiLer-i  lioiiie- 
The  covey  of  quail  u()  b  K'k  nvery  ^VfMiint:  to 
lliiur  old  liome,  Mild  tlif^  deer  keeps  to  his  fMirili- 
iar  runways,  and  tlie  rabbit,  pveMi  vvh;Mi  pursut^d 
by  tlie  lioinid  circies  h- onievvuX'  again.  It  is 
the  liouie-iiistiiiet  in  th^^  nir  I  .'t  i  [  animal,  and 
wherever  man  may  roam  h:^  sriii  i^oes  home 
a,u"ain  in  sacred  memories  an  1  often  while  ah)iie 
the  unforbidden  tear  will  star'  a:^d  ]]  '  is  once 
more  up  )ti  tlie  old  do  >r-.-i  i  and  in  the  embrace 
of  his  hjved  ones. 

'd^ervvtM'n  hro-id  fich'^  of  wh-Mt.  and  corn 

}<  the  loariv  house  wIm'  »^  [  !><  rn. 

The  |)<  L'ch  tree  I  '.lUS  riLraiti-l  llh'  wall 

And  the  vvo.hihiiie  wan  lers  over  ail. 

'J'here  is  the  l)arn,  nnil  as  of  \  <>r<' 

1  ear)  smell  the  hay  fr<»!i>  th(^  o])en  door, 

And  see  ibe  hn^v  swMliovvs  thr<>no-. 

AlmI  hear  the  Peevvee's  niDnrnfiil  song, 

Oh.  ye  vvhi)  daily  cross  the  sill, 

Step  lightly  fori  love  it  still — Buchanan  Read 

THE  MODEL  HOME  IS  ATTRACTIVE. 

I  have  known  many  live  in  a  rude  house  with- 
out a  picture  cm  the  wall,  or  a  paper  in  the 
home,  or  the  advautaoes  of  a  lecture  or  a  book, 
and  slave  on  the  farm  for  thirty  or  forty  years 
expecting  to  leave  the  old  shed  when  their  for- 


THi]  MODEL  BOME 


119 


t  '  Vw)s  n:M;U\  nu)V('  if)to  the  city  avid  enjoy 
lii;^  ()  vv!':i'  !;i!ii(Mital)!e  faihiiv  tlu'y  linve 
i?':.*: li'".  H M(i  now  liH'v  vvMiidt'r  up  and  down  the 
8t]eels  l()i!f^^^(MM<-  anil  disa])p()i uteri  alllioiiiili  sur- 
n >iii!(l'^d  hy  1  ii' 'vh  huIh.  For  tliirty  years  tliey 
eiincateu  aw  !V  th-  t  jfvte  of  the  beautiful,  for  the 
intd'o/i  aai  aa<l  (levfMoi>v-d  only  the  mercenary, 
a:rJ  now  r!ipy  cnrinot  enjoy  the  iieautiful,  tliey 
cannot  efij  -v  r^ndin^^.  and  cannot  make  money 
ami  tbey  are  miserable.  What  a  tremendous 
mistake  to  defer  the  model  home  until  you  are 
o'd  and  uidHO  ci  for  real  |)leasnie  and  (^xjject  to 
i^-etall  the  !Hi[>ifiness  of  life  in  a  few  years  at 
las^,  insteari  of  having'  it  beautiful  all  along, 
ami  your  c!iihh*e)i  cradled  and  o;r-;)wn  amidst  its 
sacred  atmosphere.  I  would  charm  every  home 
witii  music  and  gave  the  i>ir!s  and  boys  an  op- 
pt)i  tuuity  to  learn  it,  and  tlieri  the  family  will 
be  an  orchestra  durirr<j:  the  lonij:  wiuter  evenings. 
Let  the  children  have  innocent  anrusements, 
aud  let  the  parents  jv)in  Vvdth  them  in  holy  de- 
light. I  would  have  no  ]3arlor  o^'  furnish ir.gs 
too  sacred  to  be  used  by  the  whole  famj'ly.  Too 
many  parlors  have  been  like  the  old  fashioned 
spare  bedroom,  only  for  company.  A  little  girl 
said  as  the  Sun's  rays  fell  upon  her  spoon  as 
she  was  eating,  ^'O  mamma,  1  have  swallowed  a 
whole  spoonful  of  Sun's  rays,  and  so  I  w(vuld 
put  allopathic  doses  of  sunshine  in  the  every 


120 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


day  bill-of-fare.  It  is  mother's  love  and  father's 
interest,  and  the  family  circle's  courtesies  and 
gelf  denials  that  makes  a  happy  home. 

'Mid  pleasures  and  palaces  though  we  may  roam, 
Still,  be  it  ever  so  humble,  there's  no  place  like  home. 
A  charm  from  the  skies  seems  to  hallow  it  there, 
Which,  go  through  the  world,  you'll  not  meet  with 
elsewhere, 

Home,  home,  sweet  home: 

There's  no  place  like  home. — Payne, 

Many  of  you  will  say  with  me  what  would  I 
not  give  to  be  permitted  to  visit  my  childliood 
home  as  I  once  saw  it,  to  pass  over  the  threshold 
and  meet  the  loved  ones  as  of  yore.  Time  with 
his  ruthless  hand  has  scattered  them  all:  one- 
half  are  in  the  spirit  world  and  the  other  half 
are  scattered  far  and  wide  by  mountain,  stream 
and  sea,  and  strangers  trip  thoughtlessly  in  the 
room  where  I  was  born,  and  from  whence  my 
parents  winged  their  flight  to  the  better  land. 

THE  MODEL  HOME  HAS  A  SPELLING  BOOK. 

I  take  the  spelling  book  to  represent  educa- 
tion in  the  home.  Children  do  not  start  their 
public  school  life  on  equal  footing .  The  great- 
est institution  of  learning  is  the  home.  It  is 
an  essential  to  have  books  in  every  home,  and 
papers  both  secular  and  religious,  I  think  every 
child  ought  to  take  a  paper.  Better  do  without 
carpets,  and  bicycles  and  horses  and  carriages 


THE  MODEL  HOME 


121 


for  pleasure  as  to  be  wiibout  books  in  the  home. 
It  is  said  that  Homer's  Illiad  was  the  favorite 
book  of  Alexander,  and  that  he  carried  a  copy 
of  it  encased  in  a  richly  jewelled  casket  of  gold 
and  at  night  he  laid  it  with  his  sword  beneath 
his  v>illow.  Caesar  loved  to  walk  in  the  foot- 
steds  of  Alexander  and  Charles  the  Xllth  of 
Sweden  vied  with  Caesar  in  his  admiration  of 
Alexander,  and  the  Turkish  Emperor  Selymus 
took  Caesar  for  his  ideal,  and  our  own  Washing- 
ton loved  Alexander.  The  name  of  Julius  Cae- 
ear  is  the  most  august  name  of  antiquity,  and 
Alexander  conquered  the  world,  and  Washing- 
ton is  the  father  of  the  world's  mightiest  nation* 
and  all  these  mighty  conquerors  got  inspiration 
from  the  old  blind  pnet,  Homer.  Homer's  Ill- 
iad has  its  influence  on  all  the  conquests  of  the 
world  down  to  America.  O  the  influence  of 
one  book.  A  single  book  has  made  an  artist,  a 
warrior,  a  hero.  Let  there  be  an  open  book  be- 
side your  work  basket,  and  if  you  have  no  taste 
for  reading  develop  one.  The  American  read- 
ers devour  the  newspapers,  but  too  few  read  his- 
tory and  literature  and  art.  The  education  of 
the  home  does  not  all  come  from  books  bound 
in  paper  and  cloth,  but  from  those  bound  in 
prints  and  tweeds  and  silks.  No  child  should 
be  permitted  to  enter  a  room  without  knocking, 
or  ever  read  the  letter  of   another   member  of 


122  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


the  family  without  permission.  Tlie  dress  and 
address  of  the  home  will  12:0  into  the  character 
f  the  child  and  follow  it  all  the  days  of  its  life. 
All  sian^  should  be  avoided,  such  as  "I'll  bet,'' 
"You  bet,"  "He  got  fired,"  "Up  a  stump,"  „Got 
the  cinch  on  him,"  "Do  you  tumble  to  it?"  The 
old  physician  always  asked  his  patient  to  put 
out  his  tono'ue  and  he  could  tell  what  was  wr^nig* 
with  him,  but  more  correctly  can  society  tell  all 
about  your  home  and  mental  and  moral  status 
when  you  open  your  mouth.  I  care  not  how 
gracefully  the  form  may  be  draped,  or  how  .uol'le 
the  brow  may  be  if  there  falls  from  his  or  her 
li^DS,  "Do  you  catch  on  bud?"  or  "She's  a  smar- 
ty,"  that  moment  he  drops  two  feet  in  my  esti. 
mation  intellectually,  and  the  school  that  turned 
him  out  shall  have  my  eternal  condemnation. 

THE  MODEL  HOME  IS  INFLUENTIAL. 

Many  parents  have  no  influence  over 
their  children  as  to  what  society  they  shall  keep, 
or  what  church  they  shall  loin,  or  what  business 
they  shall  engage  in.  The  parents  are  nonenti- 
ties, and  stand  for  no  convictions,  no  principles 
and  no  conscience.  Our  children  should 
stand  for  something  instead  of  moving  in  a  pro- 
miscuous way  with  the  multitude.  The  home 
influence  should  last  for  life.  A  soldier  was 
mortally  wounded  and  lay  in  a  southern  hospi- 
tal, and  the  attending  physician  would  not  al- 


THE  MODEL  IK)ME 


123 


low  his  mother  to  f. r  e  bun  who  hr.d  come  to 
nurse  him.    Sli-  f  '.iiL  ^^^^  ^^^^ 

just  lay  my  hnnd  n;^o!>  his  lieatl  aud  T  will  not 
speak  to  him."'  '^'m^  went  in  sc^ftly  and 
smoothed  his  br.r:  in;.^  brow,  arnl  without  open- 
ing his  eyes  1:ie  !^::;;h  ''Kiothe]'  has  ccri^e.*'  It  is 
that  touch  of  the  c^id  \\ov\e  iha'  we  need  io  fol- 
low  us  forever.  When  Henry  Clay,  the  Ameri- 
can Demosthenes  lay  dyinj^^  lie  was  a  child  once 
more  and  repeated.  ''My  mother,  my  mother, 
mother."  Thecliildren  can  never  get  away 
from  the  ri.Ldit  kind  of  a  liome. 

THE  MODEL  KCME  FAS  A  EIELE  IN  IT. 

I  take  the  bible  to  represent  christian  culture. 
There  is  tooniuch  animalism  and  goldism,  and 
not  enough  Christism  in  the  home.  Some  of 
meanest  and  smallest  men  have  the  largest  bank 
accounts,  and  they  move  my  pity  to  think  what 
they  will  be  when  seperated  from  their  pocket- 
books.  One  of  the  dearest  recollections  of  my 
early  home  is  father  with  the  large  family  bible 
before  him  Sunday  after  Sunday  when  his  head 
was  white  with  the  unmicltable  snows  of  winter, 
and  his  heart  was  joyous  as  the  Spring  with  the 
hopes  and  inspirations  of  the  holy  book.  I 
have  carried  that  picture  for  twenty-five  years 
and  it  giows  brighter  and  more  divine  as  my 
heart  ripens  so  I  can  appreciate  it.  Christian- 
ity is  not  alone  in  reading  the  bible  and  having 


124 


HARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


family  prayer  It  is  thit  Christ  spirit  that 
never  complains  about  the  church,  or  gossips 
about  neighbors  and  lives  the  golden  rule.  It 
is  Christ  in  spirit  and  action  rather  than  in  form 
and  words.  It  is  honor,  and  honesty,  and  right, 
and  kindness,  and  love  robed  in  father's  and 
mother's  flesh  that  makes  the  home  a  niinature 
heaven.  In  the  model  home  the  whereabouts 
of  the  boys  and  girls  are  known  by  the  parents 
every  evening.  No  sensible  young  man  will 
ever  go  to  the  streets  at  ten  and  eleven  o'clock 
at  night  to  look  for  a  wife. 

THE  MEMORIES  OF  THE  MODEL  HOME  ARE  BLESSED 

God  pity  the  man  who  has  no  recollections 
of  home,  who  has  no  memory  of  the  easy  chair, 
the  spring,  the  cradle,  the  apple  tree,  the  dinner 
horn,  the  corn  huskings,  the  family  reunion,  the 
picture  of  mother,  and  Christmas  morning. 
What  inspirations  these  hallowed  memories 
have  given  to  life.  The  sweetest  food  I  ever  ate 
I  carried  in  my  tin  pail  to  school  in  boyhood, 
audit  was  plain  too;  the  brightest  light  I  ever 
saw  was  the  little  old  fashioned  lamp  on  my 
mother's  table,  the  sweetest  words  I  ever  heard 
was  on  my  return  from  my  first  absence  from 
home,  and  the  now  sainted  one  embraced  me  at 
the  door,  and  said,  "Son,  welcoijie  home." 

''The  sorrowing  babe 
Clings  to  its  mother's  bosom,  the  bleeding  dove 


THE  MODEL  HOMB 


125 


Flies  to  her  native  vale,  and  nestles  there 

Ttt  die  amid  the  quiet  ^rove,  where  first 

She  tried  her  tender  pinion.    1  could  love 

Thus  to  repose  amid  these  peaceful  scenes, 

To  memory  dear.    Oh,  it  were  passing  sweet 

To  rest  forever  on  this  lovely  spot. 

Where  passed  my  days  of  innocence,  to  dream 

Of  the  pure  stream  of  infant  happiness 

Sunk  in  Jife's  wdd  and  burning  sands  to' dwell — 

On  visions  faded,  till  my  broken  heart 

Shall  cease  to  throb — to  purify  my  soul 

With  high  and  holy  musings-^and  to  lift 

Its  as[)irations  to  the  central  home 

Of  love,  and  peace,  and  huliness,  in  heaven." 

Young  men,  live  at  home,  for  the  rented  room 
has  blighted  thousands  of  hopeful  lives;  youni^ 
married  people,  start  a  home  and  pay  for  it  and 
live  in  it;  wealthy  men,  build  no  more  crowded 
flats,  but  neat  little  cottages  where  every  family 
lives  by  itself;  families,  never  forsake  house- 
keeping for  hotel  ease  for  your  children  will  go 
out  into  life  fmm  boarding  houses  destitute  of 
the  frau;rance  of  home,  of  memories  of  bric-a- 
brac  and  historical  souvineers  that  j^ive  a  mean 
ing  t^)  life.  Take  a  cut  of  the  old  home  with 
you  and  it  will  pull  you  back  in  the  hour  of 
temptation,  and  lift  you  up  in  the  hour  of  de- 
spondency, and  help  you  on  your  way  to  heaven- 


126 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


*'Backward,  turn  backward,  O  Time,  in  ^our  flight 
Make  me  a  child  again,  just  for  to-night: 
Mother,  come  back  from  yon  desclute  sliore, 
Take  m;e. again  to  3^our  heart  as  of  yore; 
Kiss  from  my  forehead  the  furrows  of  care, 
Smooth  the  lew  silver  threads  out  of  my  hair; 
Over  m3'' sluojbers  your  loving  watch  keep.— 
Rock  pae  to  sleep,  mother,  rock  me  to  sleep.*' 


127 


HERIDITY, 

Lo^Gtur©  XI I L 

Whatsoever  a  man  soweth  that  shall  he  also  reap. 
—Paul. 

"  The  father's  have  eaten  sour  ti;rapes,  and  the 
children's  teeth  are  set  on  edj;e!" 

Do  men  jjiither  grapes  of  thorns,  or  figs  of 
thistles  ? —Christ. 

'*Adam  lived  an  hundred  and  thirty  ^^ears  and 
beiJ^at  a  son  in  his  on  n  likeness,  after  his  ima^^e, 
and  called  his  name  Setli/' 

As  through  one  man  sin  entered  into  the  world, 
and  death  throui^h  sin:  and  so  deMtli  passed  unto 
all  men  for  ail  have  sinned. — Paul. 

''For  1  the  Lord  tli}^  God  a  n  a  jealous  God,  vis- 
iting the  iniquity  of  the  latlu-rs  upon  the  children 
unto  the  third  and  fourth  generation  of  them  that 
hate  me;  and  showing  ujerey  unto  thousands  of 
them  that  love  me  and  keep  my  commandments/' 

When  I  call  to  remembrance  tt»e  unfeigned  f«ith 
that  is  in  thee,  winch  dwelt  first  in  thy  grand- 
mothe"  Loi-^!.  an*^  ihy  motlu  r  Kunice;  and  I  run 
persuaiied  that  is  in  thee  also. — Paul. 

I  believe  in  bluod  and  that  it  will  tell.  I  be- 
lieve in  the  poverty  and  vs^eaMi  of  physical 
l)lood,  in  its  sickness  Hi)d  heMlth.  I  t>elieve  in 
pure  and  imptire  blood,  in  honest  and  dihhoiit'st 


128  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


blood,  in  humble  and  aristocratic  blood  and  in 
all  kinds  of  blood.  A  christian  gentleman  of 
my  church  said  to  me  one  day  "it  is  all  in  ihe 
bringing  up  of  children,  there  is  nothing  in  Ihe 
blood. ^'  I  replied  it  is  good  bringing  up  that 
makes  good  men  of  some  boys  and  they  require 
ten  times  as  mucli  good  bringing  up  as  some 
other  boys.  I  told  him  to  place  twelve  eggs 
under  a  brooding  hpn,  six  of  ihe  etrgs  Lii:ht 
Brahmas  and  the  other  six  Game  eggs,  and  let 
them  h  ive  the  same  food,  care,  yard  and  mother 
until  they  are  six  months  old  and  M\  me  wh  eh 
lot  has  the  most  fight  in  it,  and  which  lot  the 
most  retreat?  I  have  taken  a  tine  colt,  broad 
between  the  eyes,  and  a  mild  look,  to  break  in 
and  felt  it  was  an  ea^y  job.  and  I  have  taken  a 
colt  with  a  dished  face  and  much  white  in  the 
eyes  and  a  habit  of  watching  me  backwards  and 
somehow  I  felt  that  I  had  an  undeveloped  balk 
to  care  for.  There  is  disposition  in  the  animals 
that  comes  down  for  ages  or  why  seek  the  Nor- 
man horse  for  draft,  and  others  for  the  track? 

HEREDITY  IS  AN  EXACT  SCIENCE. 

I  do  not  believe  that  there  is  any  such  thing 
as  unlucky  Friday  or  '^accident  of  birth."  We 
are  not  born  male  and  female  by  accident,  but 
in  the  wisdom  and  providence  of  God.  There 
are  19  boys  born  the  world  over  for  every  18 
girls  and  chance  is  not  so  systematic.    We  are 


129 


not  born  weak  or  sirou'j:  physic^ally,  n  Nttaliy 
by  accident  bat  by  un  ilterabL.^  lavvc^  "^Ve  ■  re 
not  born  misers  or  pliilanthronists  by  mere 
chance.  Oliildren  of  (h-unkards  and  )er!  :-.es 
are  ni  ore  li  kely  to  >]  lo  w  tl  i  e  1  r  pa  re  n  '  -  < :  I  y  < '  t 
there  are  apparent  excep.tions.  Sui^ivMuiieH  a 
Bon  strikes  back  to  a  ^r.in  ! parent,  soruotlnies  to 
an  uncle,  or  one  of  the  parerd.s. 

HEREDITY  AS  Sr.l^N^  i:^  THH  BODY. 

Children  l<Jok  like  their  pireats  or  soni3  of 
their  atjcestry.  They  ar*^  dyinij,'  every  day  in 
infancy,  and  men  and  w  )iu-n  in  life's  prime  and 
the  miinster  speaks  of  it  in  the  providence  of 
God,  and  it  is  a  good  providence  to  remove  the 
Biilieiin^-  from  the  unbearable  V)urdens  of  life, 
bui  lifty  or  one  Imnchvd  years  a.o-o  their  ances- 
try sowed  the  seed  wliich  br  Miy^lit  the  black 
harvest  of  death.  "'The  sins  of  the  fathers  are 
visited  d(jwn  to  the  third  and  fourth  t^enera- 
lions."'  Back  of  many  a  row  of  tiny  graves  is 
written  tlie  solemn  law  of  heredity.  Oliver 
Wendell  Holmes  thinks  that  any  disease  might 
be  cured  if  the  physician  were  called  in  time, 
but  early  enough  would  commonly  mean  two 
hundred  years  in  advance."  The  blood  of  three 
hundred  years  is  coursing  in  our  veins.  Con- 
sumption, insanity,  scrofula,  cancer,  leprosy  and 
the  nameless  disease  are  all  hereditary.  Dr. 
James  gives  an  illustration  on   hereditary  dis- 


130  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


eases  which  every  physician  could  multiply  by 
thousands.  A  lovely  infant  is  in  a  cradle  with 
a  sore  mouth.  A  cousin  and  a  sister  bend  down 
and  kiss  the  little  one.  It  is  ten  weeks  old  and 
strange  eruptions  appear  on  its  face.  The  sis- 
ter and  cousin  are  afflicted  hi  the  same  way  and 
the  mother  says,  "you  must  not  kiss  the  baby 
again."  The  mischief  is  done;  at  thirty-six 
weeks  the  infant  dies,  the  cousin  lingers  ten 
years,  and  the  sister  marries  and  brinies  into  the 
world  a  child  with  a  strangely  blotched  face. 
It  lingers  four  years  and  the  nasal  bones  drop, 
and  it  becomes  a  mass  of  corruption,  and  soon 
goes  to  a  loathsome  grave.  No  one  should  kiss 
the  dead,  and  if  I  were  a  baby  again  I  would 
object  to  being  kissed  by  every  woman  in  the 
neighborhood.  These  fearful  examples  are 
given  from  the  highest  authority.  A  military 
officer  kissed  his  niece  good  bye,  and  there  was 
no  visible  disease  on  him,  but  she  became  af- 
fected and  died  of  a  single  kiss.  Dr.  Bemis  of 
Kentucky  says  that  ten  per  cent  of  the  deaf  and 
dumb  and  five  per  cent  of  the  blind,  and  fifteen 
per  cent  of  idiots  placed  in  the  dififerent  estab- 
lishments in  the  United  States  are  issues  from 
parents  who  are  first  cousins.  Of  757  marriages 
between  first  cousins,  256  children  born  were 
mutes,  blind  or  idiots. 


HEREDITY 


131 


MENTAL  TRAITS  ARE  HEREDITARY. 

Joseph  Cook  says  from  500-300  B.  C.  the 
Greek  race  produced  28  illustrious  men. 
In  those  two  hundred  years  it  produced  Aris- 
tides,  Epaminondas,  Pericles,  Pytha^^oras,  Soc- 
rates, Euclid,  Plato,  Aristotle,  Euripides, 
8ophocles,  Aristo})hanes,  Phidias,  Heroditus, 
Thucydide  s,  Xenophon  and  Demosthenes. 
Attica  had  at  this  time  only  SiO,000  free  men, 
and  yet  one  illnstinous  man  to  every  5,000  men. 
All  Europe  in  2,000  years  has  not  produced  28 
sucli  immortals.  He  fuilher  adds  take  the  two 
thou-iand  years  since  Greece  fell,  sum  up  all  tlie 
brilliant  stars  in  the  historic  firmament  of  those 
twenty  centuries,  and  there  is  no  more  li^ht  in 
all  that  wide  heavens  than  in  the  single  Greek 
constellation  of  Orion,  or  in  the  compact  Athen- 
ian Pleiades,  which  blaze  close  about  us  as  we 
stand  here  on  the  Acropolis.  The  reason  is 
that  Athenian  citizens  were  so  trained  in  pub- 
lic debate  and  compelled  to  defend  themselves 
before  the  law  courts,  that  the  average  citizen 
could  appreciate  the  condensed  orations  of 
Demosthenes,  When  they  grew  lax  in  morals, 
and  ignored  marriage  and  indulged  in  idleness 
and  vice  she  degraded  into  effeminate  weak- 
ness. I  shall  never  forget  the  impression  that 
the  busts  of  the  emperors  and  other  illustrious 
men  made  on  me  in  the  hall  in  Toronto.    I  con- 


132 


MARRIAGE  AND  TVE  I'.OME 


traU^H       •  .  fiPiidiph    l-  ok   and  whose 

niotli*  r  \  •  ^?  thic-koniii<^  seiisiirtl  face  with  the 
saintly  ?«[  r >  Aurelius.  A-^  certainly  as  tho 
iiifernal  u'>rts  f)F  elinraeter  Cfun*^  down  in  the 
line  of  Ner  '  )  sniely  tlie  lieavenly  came  down 
in  tlie  I'm  '  of  Aarelia^.  Nero's  father  said 
whatever  came  from  him  and  A<j:ripina  would 
rnin  tbe  state.  Wesley's  V)rr)w  looke  1  calm  and 
peaceful  and  Hnme's  d.irk  and  cold:  contrast 
Guiteau  with  Garfield,  tlie  inky  darkness  of 
crime  with  the  snowy  whiteness  of  purity. 
Aristotle,  xleschuyles,  McOauley,  Napoleon, 
Wesley,  Sir  Walter  Scott  all  came  r)f  traits  of 
distinctive  character  in  sojne  of  their  ancestors, 

MORAL  TPATTS  ARE  [HEREDITARY. 

Idleness,  avarice,  industry,  and  crime  all  come 
down  to  us  in  somedeo-ree.  Dr  Oliver  Wendell 
Holmes  says,  ''a  man  is  an  omnibus  in  w^hich 
all  his  ancestors  are  seated."  President  Burr 
had  for  a  father  the  libertine  Aaron  Barr,  and 
his  grandson  was  the  saintly  Jonathan  Edwards 
Sometimes  children  gro  back  generations  and 
inherit  the  traits  of  their  ancestors.  I  called 
on  a  mother  in  Israel  a  few  days  since,  and  the 
saintly  spirit  was  shining  through  the  thinning 
vase  of  clay.  She  said  of  her  daughter  fifty, 
years  of  age  "she  is  a  darling  girl  and  lives  only 
for  the  better  world,"  and  I  thought  how  could 
she  do  otherwise,  fori  could  see  the  mother  m 


HEREDITY 


133 


the  dauirl^tt^  r  so  plainly.  Others  are  born  with 
a  w}:oie  aistillery  of  whiskey  in  their  veins.  A 
niiuiSter  told  uie  tht-  story  of  punishing  his  way- 
ward  bv>y.  He  icot  ready  to  punish  hioi  and  as 
he  looked  at  him  he  saw  himself  with  a  very 
imlv  temper  in  liis  boy  and  I  turned  away  from 
pu/.isLun-  niyseif.  Traits  physically,  mentally^ 
and  m  >raily  are  handed  down  from  one  genera- 
tion to  anotlu-r.  Tlie  Negro  color  and  cheery 
dispositioji  If  seen  in  all  generations,  the  Indian 
disposirion  of  revenge  has  never  changed,  the 
Irish  wit  and  gift  of  speech  and  jDUgnacity  is 
ever  witli  Ijim  and  so  with  the  persistency  of 
the  Scotch,  atid  ihe  conquest  of  Roman  blood. 
Tahij;sgc  says  the  ''large  lip  of  the  House  of 
Austria  is  seen  in  ail  generations,  and  is  called 
the  Hapsbiirg  lip.  The  House  of  Stuart  al- 
ways means  in  all  generations  cruelty  and  big- 
otry and  sensuality.*' 

HOW  CAN    WE    HARMONIZE   HEREDITY    WITH  THE 
GOODNESS  OF  GOD? 

It  would  seem  that  thus  far  we  had  left  God 
out  of  the  redemption  of  man,  and  were  trying 
by  the  law  of  heredity  to  fix  his  state,  and  thus 
make  him  a  machine  so  placed  that  he  cannot 
help  doing  good  or  bad.  Does  not  the  innocent 
suffer  for  the  impiety  of  its  ancestry?  It  does, 
and  yet  by  the  same  law  that  evil  comes  to  us 
comes  also  the  means  of  bettering  the  condition 


134 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


of  the  yet  unborn.  Stock  and  fruit  trees  and 
strawberries  could  never  be  improved  were  it 
not  for  this  very  law.  It  is  a  mighty  factor 
for  uplifting  the  worhl  if  well  used,  and  if 
abused  it  is  a  tremendous  weajjon  of  misery. 
Fire  and  water  and  electricity  and  brain  are 
antj^els  of  mercy  if  well  used,  but  if  abused  are 
messengers  ox  destruction.  The  conversion  of 
the  whole  heathen  world  dors  not  depend  on 
the  adult  heathens,  but  oti  the  children  who 
are  being  trained,  and  the  christian  relijjfion  bp- 
comes  a  part  of  tliern  and  will  be  beq  uenthcd  to 
the  nations  unborn.  It  is  the  law  of  society 
that  the  innocent  must  suffer  with  the  truilty  to 
Bome  extent.  Every  idler  and  every  criminal  is 
a  burden  on  the  body  ])oliti(!  and  on  the  tax- 
payer. If  heredity  is  such  a  tremendous  force 
and  influenc<»  what  lessons  can  we  learn  from 
it? 

1st.  The  first  lesson  is  the  terrible  responsi 
bility  of  |)?irents.  They  may  cramp  the  brain, 
and  pollute  the  physical  and  moral  manhood  of 
the  unborn  infant  and  bring  it  into  the  woild 
crippled  for  life;  it  is  a  cruel  crime  against 
blood  of  their  blood  and  flesh  of  their  flesh. 
Every  x)eaceful  state  of  mind,  every  impulse 
thought,  every  violent  temper,  every  holy  or  un- 
holy  act  will  live  in  our  families  for  all  time 
unless  the  grace  of  G-od  saves  us. 


HEREDITY 


135 


2nd  Lesson.  If  you  are  born  of  good  par- 
ents who  lived  and  sacrificed  for  you  and  con- 
secrated you  to  God  and  you  deliberately  walk 
away  from  ilie  altar  of  prayer  and  the  mother's 
hean  and  lead  a  wicked  life  your  responsibility 
wiii  In-  teiifoid  greater,  and  your  condemnation 
terrniiie.  **VViiere  much  is  given  much  will  be 
requiivu." 

iird  Lesson.  If  you  have  come  from  a  wicked 
and  (iei^raded  ancestry,  and  from  unholy  en- 
viron nieti  Is  you  need  all  the  more  to  brace  up 
a^auifet  your  evil  tendencies,  and  God  will  help 
you  mid  give  you  all  the  more  credit  when  you 
overcome. 

MIGHTY  TO  SATE. 

Whatever  the  past  has  bt-en,  liowf\erlow  and 
degraded  your  ancestry  may  have  been,  how- 
ever damnino-  and  polluting  tlieir  influence  up- 
on you,  though  you  nifiy  have  coma  of  parents 
and  neighbors  reeking  with  social  liitli  and  crime, 
and  the  hereditary  influences  of  the  past  five 
hundred  years  may  be  as  mighty  as  the  great 
law  of  gravity  which  rounds  the  oceans  like 
balls,  and  holds  the  earth  and  planets  in  their 
worldly  swings,  and  as  the  Sun  is  mightier  than 
the  law  of  gravity  and  lifts  ocean-volumes  of 
water  over  the  mountain  ranges  and  the  great 
prairies  so  Jesus  is  mighty  to  save  to  the  utter- 
most all  who  come  unto  him  by  faith.    He  cast 


136 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


seven  devils  out  of  Mary  MR^.rdfvIp?7i',  n?id  Rive  1 
John  Banyan  and  plar^ed  In'iu  in  s'lr-ivd  auta  r- 
sliip  next  to  the  holy  bible.  MTid  r'on verted  Saul 
the  mightiest  persecutor  of  Christiaus  and  made 
him  the  foremost  missionary  of  ihe  world  a: id 
the  mightiest  defender  of  tlie  triiMi, 

"He  I>reaks  the  po\v<*r  of  e  mcelled  siu, 
He  sets  the  prisonttP  fr(M% 
His  hl^  od  enn  mwki'  iIk*  foulest  cletiD, 
His  hlooil  avails  fcr  me/' 

"Come  now,  and  let  as  reason  tocrether,  saith 
the  Lord:  thou^'h  your  sins  be  as  scarlet,  they 
shall  be  whit"  as  snow;  thouirli  they  be  red  like 
crimson,  ih-^y  shall  be  as  wo  )1."  "Who  is  this 
that  Cometh  from  Ed om,  with  dyed  garments 
from  Bozrali?  This  that  is  glorious  in  his  ap- 
parel, travelling  in  t'^e  greatness  of  his 
strength?  I  that  speak  in  righteousness,  mighty 
to  save."  Great  salvation,  mighty  Deliverer, 
claim  your  inheritance  today  from  the  power  of 
Satan  unto  God.  Let  us  sing  with  heart  and 
voice,  and  ascribe  all  praise  and  dominion  and 
power  unto  the  Lamb  forever, 

*'AH  bail  the  power  of  Jesus  name, 
Let  angels  prostrate  fall, 
Bring  forth  the  royal  diadern 
And  crown  him  Lord  of  all.*' 


137 


DIVORCE, 

It  hath  been  said,  whosoev^er  shj\l!  put  away  iiis 
wife,  lec  him  give  her  a  bill  of  divorcement  but  1 
say  unto  you  thai  wliosoevr-r  shall  put  away  his 
wife  saving  for  the  cause  of  fornication,  causeth 
her  to  commit  adultery. — Christ. 

And  unto  the  married  1  command,  and  yet  not  I 
but  the  Lord,  let  not  the  wife  depart  from  her  hus- 
band ;  1  ut,  and  if  she  depart  let  her  remain  un- 
married, or  be  re<'-oociied  to  her  husband  ;  and  let 
not  the  husband  put  away  his  wife. — Paul. 

The  Pharisee  also  came  unto  him,  tempting  him, 
and  saying  unto  liim,  '*Is  it  lawful  for  a  man  to 
put  away  his  wife  for  every  cause?"  And  he  ans- 
wered and  said  unto  them,  have  ye  not  read  that 
he  which  made  them  at  Hie  beginning  made  them 
male  and  female.  And  said,  for  this  cause  shall  a 
£iian  leave  father  and  mother,  and  shall  cleave  to 
his  wife:  and  they  twain  shall  be  one  flesh.  Where- 
fore thev  are  no  more  twain  1  ut  one  flesh.  What 
therefore  God  hath  joined  together  let  not  man  put 
as  under.  —  Jes  u  s . 

That  utterance  of  Jesus  Christ,  ''What  there- 
fore God  hath  joined  together  let  no  man  put 
asunder"  ought  to  be  written  on  the  walls  of 
every  court  house  in  America.    My  subject  to- 


m 


MARRIAGE  AND   Tilli  HOME 


nilifht  irf  oue  ')f  vast  iiii(}'^rtance,  and  but  little 
iHulerstoDcl  ill  its  sigui (ic  ince  thoiiL(!i  so  com- 
moil  ammg  us.  It  is  omp  of  the  greatest  evils 
of  our  nation,  and  strikes  with  tremendous 
force  at  tlie  sacreduess  ')l  the  marriage  institu- 
tion. There  is  no  instituUun  more  sacied  than 
the  family  and  anything  that  interferes  with 
the  family  threatens  the  very  life  of  the  church 
and  nation.  The  skies  of  domestic  life  are  om- 
inous, and  sombre  ni\d  lowering  with  the  laxity 
of  laws  on  marriage  and  divorce,  and  the  infi- 
delity  of  the  married  state.  The  M'.)rmon  made 
a  very  good  plea  for  polygamy  when  he  said  in 
Utah  a  man  may  have  several  wives  at  the  same 
time,  outside  of  Utah  a  man  may  have  several 
wives  at  different  times,  and  as  he  tires  of  one 
get  a  divorce  and  marry  another.  He  argued 
that  the  moral  status  of  the  Morman  was  better 
than  the  Gentile.  God  never  designed  either 
the  one  or  the  other  Time  will  not  permit  us 
to  discuss  this  great  evil  in  other  countries  so 
we  will 

LOOK  AT  THE  SITUATION  AT  HOME. 

Carroll  D.  Wright,  commissioner  of  labor  in 
charge,  gave  us  in  1890  some  important  facts  on 
the  eonjugal  relations.  In  1890  there  were  32,- 
067,880  males  in  the  United  States  and  30.554,- 
370  females,  an  excess  of  m  iles  of  1,493,510. 
There  were  widowtjrs  815,437,  and   widows  2,- 


DIVORCE 


139 


154,615.  There  were  ui  orjed  males  49,101  and 
females  71,895.  The  e :  ^  .ss  of  females  who 
were  widows,  or  divorce  d  over  the  males  is 
largely  due  to  the  fact  that  the  men  are  more 
likely  to  marry  again.  In  the  state  of  Illinois 
there  are  1,972,305  males  and  1,854,043  females^ 
an  excess  of  males  of  118,265.  Massachu^-etts 
had  an  excess  of  females  of  60,000  and  Colorado 
an  excess  78,000  males.  This  may  be  accounted 
for  by  more  men  going  West  than  women.  In 
the  fifty  largest  cities  in  the  Union  there  are 
5,635,550  males  and  5,662,598  females,  an  excess 
of  females  of  27,048.  I  have  quoted  these  fig- 
ures to  show  three  things:  the  remarkable  even- 
ness of  birth  of  boys  and  girls  is  a  marvel  and 
argues  First,  that  birth  is  not  by  accident  but 
by  the  providence  and  wisdom  of  God.  Second 
that  God  designed  monogamy  for  the  married 
state,  one  husband  and  wife  and  that  for  life. 
Third,  that  the  excess  of  males  over  females 
points  clearly  and  conclusively  to  the  fact  that 
the  life  of  man  is  more  hazardous  than  that  of 
woman,  and  that  God  intended  that  the  spheres 
of  man  and  woman  should  be  different.  These 
figures  constitute  the  American  argument,  and 
the  God  who  spake  in  times  past  in  the  bible 
speaks  today  to  every  observer  of  the  times  in 
our  own  history.  We  cannot  put  this  evil  on 
foreigners  and  make  them  a  sort  of  whale  back 


140 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


to  bear  our  sins  away  for,  anions  the  children 
of  foreign  white  people  there  are  fewer  divorces 
than  among  native  white  people,  and  fewer  still 
among  foreigners  than  among  either  native 
Americans  or  the  children  of  foreigners.  There 
are  more  divorces  among  Negroes  than  among 
any  other  class. 

WE  WILL  NEXT    CONSirLK   THE    LAXITY    OF  THE 
CONJUGAL  RELATIONS. 

Among  many  thirjgs  which  have  combined  to 
bring  about  laxity  in  marriage  I  mention  two. 
The  first  has  been  polygamy  in  Utah.  It  has 
been  a  great  cancer  in  the  breast  of  this  nation. 
This  great  source  of  libertinism  has  sent  its 
putrefying  influences  to  the  four  points  of  the 
compass,  and  now  thank  God  its  doom  is  ap- 
parently sealed.  Another  source  of  evil  was 
the  free-love  campaign  which  had  its  rage  for 
at  least  twenty  years  in  our  principal  cities,  and 
was  championed  by  masculine  women  and  ef- 
feminate men.  Much  evil  has  come  through 
unwise  speeches  on  the  oppression  of  the  mnr- 
riage  relation,  the  tyranny  of  man  and  woman's 
rights.  Let  it  be  understood  that  man  and 
woman  may  be  equal  in  mental  and  business 
capabilities  but  that  they  are  never  equivalents 
and  each  sex  hap  its  own  orbit  to  move  in  where 
it  can  accomplish  most  and  where  God  designed 
it  to  b^^. 


DIVORCE 


141 


LEGAL  CAUSES  FOR  DIVORCE. 

In  the  United  States,  adultery,  vagrancy,  in- 
sanity, desertion,  drunkenness,  imprisonment, 
neglect  to  provide,  impotency,  fraud,  cruelty, 
and  uncliastity  before  marriage  are  legal  causes 
for  divorce.  In  the  state  of  Illinois  we  have  a 
long  list  of  causes  for  legal  divorce,  and  in  ad- 
dition the  courts  have  the  right  to  grant  the  de- 
cree of  divorce  in  any  case  they  think  expedi- 
ent. It  is  passing  easy  to  get  a  divorce.  Take 
for  example  the  cause  of  crueltj^  and  what  does 
that  imply?  It  is  a  balloon  word  that  can  be 
inflated  to  cover  almost  any  individual  case. 
One  woman  applied  for  divorce  because  her 
husband  was  stingy,  another  because  he  had  an 
ugly  temper,  another  because  he  was  indifferent 
when  she  was  «ick,  another  because  he  tried  to 
kick  her  and  failed,  another  because  he  swore 
at  her,  and  another  because  he  threw  water  on 
her.  South  Carolina  is  the  only  state  in  the 
Union  where  divorce  is  n'^  t  granted,  and  the 
other  exireme  is  Kentucky  where  there  are  13 
causes  for  legal  divorce.  San  Francisco  grant- 
ed 833  divorces  in  1880.  In  London  there  are 
four  divorces  to  every  1,000  marriages,  in  Ber- 
lin 10,  in  Paris  25,  in  Boston  73  and  in  San 
Francisco  223.  Divorce  is  on  the  increase  all 
over  the  country  to  an  alarming  extent.  In 
Peoria  county,  Illinois,  there  were  in  1894  763 


142  MARRIAGE  AND  TEE  HOME 

marriages,  and  118  divorces,  or  a  divorce  to 
every  eight  and  a  half  man  in- -s.  For  the  first 
six  months  of  1895  there  w-  )  e  75  divorces,  or  an 
average  of  one  divorce  to  fiv^^.  mar.-iages.  Mr. 
Dike  says,  **It  is  safe  to  say  that  divorces  have 
doubled  in  proportion  to  mHrvia^^^es  in  most  of 
the  Northern  states  witfiiii  thirty  years.  One 
man  got  a  divorce  in  1894  in  Peoria  county  and 
in  1895  has  applied  for  another.  One  woman 
who  was  sent  to  the  penitent  ary  for  five  years 
for  having  a  girl  ruined  in  h^r  house  got  a  di- 
vorce a  short  time  before  she  was  imprisoned. 

MARRIAGE  LAWS  DIFFER  IN  THE  DIFFERENT  STATES 

Maryland  is  the  only  state  in  the  Union 
where  a  religious  service  is  necessary  in  mar- 
riage. In  this  respect  Maryland  is  like  the 
Dominion  of  Canada  where  none  but  an  or- 
dained clergyman  can  perform  the  marriage 
ceremony.  Mr.  Bishop  in  his  book  on  "Mar- 
riage and  Divorce"  says  concerning  some  of 
the  states  that  consent  makes  marriage.  No 
ceremony  is  needed,  no  witnesses,  no  writing 
and  only  a  verbal  agreement.  It  is  estimated 
that  80,000,000  of  our  people  live  under  such 
laws.  He  cites  many  examples  of  which  I  give 
you  only  two.  "A  New  York  widower  entered 
the  room  of  his  seamstress  in  his  family  and  of- 
fered marriage  to  her,  pleading  for  an  informal 
one  on  account  of  the  recent  death  of  his  wife. 


DIVORCE 


113 


Assuring  lier  tint  it  would  be  as  binding  with 
two  alone  with  God  to  witness,  as  a  ceremony 
performed  by  any  minister  in  New  York.  The 
other  case  is,  ''A  California  girl  of  thirteen  years 
of  age  accepted  a  proposal  of  marriage.  No 
ceremony  was  performed;  bnt  on  the  grounds  of 
promise  and  consummation,  the  supreme  court 
heldihem  to  be  married." 

AGES  AT  WHICK  PEOPLE  MARRY  DIFFER  MUCH. 

It  varies  from  twelve  to  eighteen  for  females 
and  from  fourteen  to  twenty-one  fo^  males. 
Brandt  takes  for  a  sample  the  state  of  Massa- 
chusetts in  188G,  There  was  one  bride  twelve 
years  old,  one  thirteen,  one  fourteen,  thirty-two 
at  fifteen,  one  hundred  and  sixty-two  at  sixteen, 
three  hundred  and  ei-hty-one  at  seventeen  and 
the  same  would  hold  go(  d  in  most  of  the  states. 

THE  EVILS  OF  DIVORCE. 

It  degrades  family  life.  Ask  a  boy  whose  pa- 
rents are  divorced  where  his  father  is  and  he 
answers ''I  don't  know,'' or  Mamma  don't  live 
with  him  any  more.''  It  is  imposing  a  life  long 
disgrace  upon  the  he][)less  children.  It  degiades 
character.  Men  and  women  stood  at  the  wed- 
ding altar  and  made  vow^s  solemn  as  eternity 
that  they  took  each  other  for  better  or  wone, 
and  until  death  parted  them.  When  it  is  not 
all  harmony  many  thoughtlessly  break  the  vows 
they  made  to  God  and  man  and   according  to 


144 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


the  word  of  Grod  it  causes  tliem  to  live  in  adul- 
tery if  they  marry  av^ain  while  either  party  is 
living.  It  destroys  the  home  and  turas  the  or- 
phans out  in  the  world  with  one  to  provide  for 
them  instead  of  two.  It  blights  the  nation. 
Anything  that  ruins  the  home  ruins  the  state 
and  we  cite  you  to  Rome  and  Athens  as  mighty 
examples  that  thunder  down  the  centuries  on 
the  blessedness  of  the  family  and  marriage  in 
the  palmy  days  of  their  prosperity,  and  oti  the 
wretchedness  of  laxity  of  morals  and  divorce  in 
the  days  of  their  decay. 

THE  REMEDY. 

One  of  the  alarming  aspects  of  the  case  is  that 
good  people  have  become  so  accustomed  to  this 
state  of  afifairs  that  they  think  it  is  better  to  get 
a  divorce  if  the  married  life  is  not  as  agreeable 
as  they  expected  it  to  be.  They  will  keep  their 
word  in  business  if  it  costs  them  a  fortune,  they 
will  keep  their  word  everywhere  else  and  think 
it  an  unpardonable  crime  if  they  don't  but  when 
it  comes  to  their  word  with  their  partner  in  life 
and  with  God  they  break  it  easily  and  appear  to 
have  no  qualms  of  conscience  about  it.  The 
bible  only  allows  two  causes  for  divorce,  adul- 
tery, and  Paul  would  allow  it  for  wilful  deser- 
tion. The  word  of  God  is  the  infallible  rule  of 
.  conduct  and  no  one  has  tried  to  harmonize  the 
divorce  laws  of  America  with  the  word  of  God. 


DIVOBCE 


145 


An  uulimite<l  divorce  license  presages  the  death 
of  any  empire  and  all  History  corroborates  it. 
I  would  have  uniform  marriage  and  divorce 
laws  for  the  nation  and  then  a  couple  could  not 
cross  the  state  line  in  the  evenlnpf  get  married 
or  divorced  and  return  home  in  the  morning  and 
take  their  places  as  law  abiding  and  respectable 
citizens.  Let  no  one  be  allowed  to  marry  for 
ten  years  who  gets  a  divorce  on  any  grounds 
save  the  bible  grounds  unless  one  of  the  parties 
die.  Many  love  sick  couples  hang  around  the 
halls  of  the  court  house  and  as  soon  as  the  de- 
cree is  granted  they  go  to  the  justice  of  the 
peace  and  get  married  to  number  two,  three  or 
four  as  the  case  may  be,  I  would  only  let 
clergymen  marry  people.  This  might  savor  of 
a  jmtent  right  on  the  business  but  it  is  a  matter 
of  conviction. 

The  church  of  Rome,  be  it  said  to  her  praise, 
reveres  the  marriage  institution  more  than  any 
other  church,  and  honors  the  word  of  God  more 
on  the  divorce  question  than  any  other.  If  our 
laws  were  more  stringent  people  would  be  more 
particular  about  entering  the  married  state. 
Young  ladies  can  be  heard  saying  occasionally 
today,  "Well  if  I  don't  like  him  I  can  leave 
him."  What  a  trifling  with  such  a  sacred  in- 
stitution and  with  pledges  made  to  God  and 
man.    If  parties  cannot   live   together  grant 


146 


MARRIAGE  AND  Tl]K  HOME 


them  a  pnrtial  divorce,  ^thdI  ll:em  a  separation 
to  live  apart,  but  never  permit  either  party  to 
marry  wliile  the  other  party  is  living.  This 
would  lessen  dh^orees  by  two-thirds  and  often 
thesep\rated  parties  would  make  up  and  live 
peacefully  togt^ther.  It  is  looked  upon  as  hero- 
ism to  suffer  for  the  nation  that  she  may  be  re- 
deemed; it  is  Christly  to  die  a  martyr  for  the 
cans?  of  truth;  why  not  suffer  some  inconven- 
ience that  the  home  may  be  undefiled  by  this 
[,'reat  social  evil.  I  never  saw  but  one  divorced 
couple  and  that  was  for  adultery  until  I  was  30 
years  of  age.  It  works  w*  11  in  other  countries, 
it  worked  well  in  other  ages,  it  is  the  i)lain  word 
of  God  and  shall  n^  t  the  judge  of  all  the  earth 
do  right?  ''You'ig  people  when  you  enter  the 
married  relation  let  it  be  for  life.  Oh  the  bro- 
ken wedding  vows  that  we  must  meet  at  the 
Judgement  of  Ahnighty  God.  To  all  divorce 
brokers,  hands  off,  t  all  hiw  makers,  hands  off 
the  grandest  of  all  institutions — the  marriage 
institution.  In  the  liame  of  broken  hearted 
wives  whose  husbands  have  deserted  them,  in 
the  name  of  mothers  whose  hearts  are  torn  with 
anguish,  in  the  name  of  court  made  orphans, 
and  the  sundering  of  dearest  ties,  in  the  name 
of  our  great  nation  that  is  writhing  under  ter- 
ible  disgrace,  and  in  the  :iame  of  the  Church 
of  Jesa.s  Christ,  and  in  th-  name  of  the  Holy 


DIVORCE 


147 


Bible  speak  out  a^'ainst  this  great  evil  and  wage 
eternal  war  against  any  and  every  foe  of  the 
most  sacred  place  on  earth — the  Iiome.  May 
God  speed  the  day  when  marriages  shall  always 
and  only  be  between  parties  with  a  supreme  af- 
fection, and  for  pure  love,  and  then  this  conju- 
gal relation  will  grow  more  tender  with  age,  and 
the  home  of  earth  will  blend  into  the  home 
above,  imen. 


148  MARKIAGE  AND  THE  HOMK 


The  Model  Young  Man^ 

Remember  thy  Creator  in  the  flays  of  thy  youth. 
—Solomon. 

Wherewithal  shall  a  young  man  cleanse  Ins  ways? 
by  taking  heed  thereto  according  to  thy  word, — 
David. 

See*st  thou  a  man  diligent  in  his  business?  he 
shall  stand  before  kings  ;  he  shall  not  stand  before 
iiiean  tiien  — Solomon. 

An  honest  man's  the  noblest  work  of  God. — Pope 

Do  as  I  have  done,  persevere. — Stephenson. 

•With  ordinary  talents  and  t  xtraordinary  perse- 
▼eranr'e  all  things  are  »ttainal)je — Theodore  Par- 
ker. 

Virture  alone  outbuilds  the  Pyramids; 
Her  monuments  shall  last  when  Egrypt^s  fall, 

— Young. 

Young  gentlemen  I  address  you  tonight  in 
the  most  important  time  of  your  life.  Life  is 
hJI  before  you  luminous  with  great  possibilities, 
Htid  the  greatest  victories  can  only  be  won  by 


THE  MODEL  YOUNG  MAN 


149 


devoting  all  of  life  from  youth  to  old  age  to 
their  accomplishment  Life  itself  is  a  tremen- 
dous gift  and  privelege,  and  especially  today 
when  you  start  with  the  blood  of  the  centuries 
crystallized  into  liberty,  and  civilization  and  the 
meridia  I  u'ory  of  the  world's  golden  age.  Our 
forefathers  came  "with  milleniums  in  their 
hearts  and  empires  m  their  brains,"  and  they 
have  crowned  us  kings  and  priests  unto  an  in- 
heritfiUce  the  splendour  of  which  the  prophets 
never  dreamed. 

LET  us  CLEAR  AWAY  THE  MISTS  ON  THE  HORIZON 
OF  YOUR  FUTURE. 

The  dfys  of  the  dreamer  are  not  all  past. 
Most  young  men  today  dream  dreams.  They 
have  visions  which  shall  vanish  before  the  re- 
alities of  life  as  the  mists  of  the  morning  melt 
away  before  the  blazing  San.  You  may  not  go 
to  bed  and  shut  your  e^es,  and  unconsciously 
wander  away  into  the  dreamlaud,  but  in  your 
easy  chair  with  your  eyes  open  you  take  t)alloon 
tliiihts  far  above  your  ordinary  walks  in  life, 
and  dream  of  the  happy  time  when  you  shall 
have,  wealth,  and  social  and  political  influence, 
or  be  a  prince  among  merchants,  or  a  hero  on 
the  battlefield.  These  are  day  dreams  that  are 
peculiar  to  youth,  and  which  ripened  and  expe- 
rienced manhood  interprets  as  the  vagaries  of 
the  young  hopeful.    Others  dream  that  fortune 


150 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


will  come  to  them,  or  by  chance,  or  the  force  of 
circumstances  something  will  turn  up  that  will 
endow  and  enrich  them  for  life.  The  only  way 
to  have  something  turned  up  is  to  go  to  work 
and  turn  it  up  yourself.  There  is  no  such  thing 
as  chance,  "ii  thou  doest  well  shalt  thou  not  be 
accepted,  and  if  not  well  sin  lieth  at  the  door." 
The  woof  and  warp  of  your  future  is  in  your 
own  two  hands,  weavft  it  into  ^'a  garment  of 
righteousness,"  and  a  banner  of  honor  and  glo- 
rious manhood.  There  is  another  error  which 
I  wish  to  correct  before  you  start  out  into  life. 
We  think  that  many  of  our  efforts  are  failures 
because  we  cannot  always  see  pleasing  results. 
True  success  is  in  making  character,  in  making 
man.  God  never  counts  the  wealth  and  brill- 
iant talents  that  we  possess  as  the  "well  done 
good  and  faithful."  All  the  way  through  the 
Bible,  in  Moses,  in  Joseph  ,in  Job  ,in  Abraham, 
in  David,  in  Paul,  in  eveiy  instance  without  an 
exception  it  is  integrity,  faithfulness,  purity  in 
life  and  fidelity  to  God.  As  you  develop  chris- 
tian manhood  so  you  succeed  in  life.  It  mat- 
ters little  whether  you-are  as  rich  as  Abraham, 
or  as  poor  as  the  widow  \^  hose  whole  possessions 
only  summed  up  two  farthings,  whether  you 
have  the  unanswerable  logic  of  Paul,  or  the 
slowness  of  speech  of  Moses,  these  things  are 
merely  incidental  to  life  and  not  the  real  life. 


THE  MODEL    YOUNG  MAN 


151 


As  you  build  the  pyram^'d  of  character  after  the 
pattern  of  Jesus  Christ  every  good  deed,  and 
effort  and  word  you  put  in  the  building  which 
has  been  polished  until  it  shines  like  crystals 
by  pure  motives  and  for  "Jesus  sake"  shall  last 
forever.  Not  a  good  word  spoken  shall  ever 
fail.  There  is  no  failure  if  we  are  true  to  the 
world's  only  ideal — Jesus  Clirist.  I  am  author- 
ized tonight  to  holdout  the  palm  of  victory, 
and  the  crown  "well  done  good  and  faithful"  to 
every  young  man  without  an  exception  who 
will  enter  the  race,  and  be  true  and  faithful  U 
his  Master.  We  have  cleared  your  way  of  some 
deceiving  visions,  and  now  we  will  mark  out 
some  essentials  in  developing  a  model  man. 

TAKE  THE  BIBLE  FOR  YOUR  GUIDE. 

If  you  go  to  Europe  you  follow  the  experience 
of  those  who  have  crossed  before  you,  anni  the 
pathway  of  safety  in  the  deep.  You  avoid  the 
dano-erous  reefs,  and  slioals,  and  rocks  where 
many  proud  vessels  have  been  wrecked,  and 
thus  there  is  for  you  a  grand  voyage  and  a  safe 
anchorage.  Should  there  float  from  a  sub- 
merged rock  in  the  ocean  a  signal  of  danger  you 
would  keep  clear  of  it  at  any  and  every  cost. 
The  Bible  marks  out  for  you  the  only  pathway 
of  safety.  It  raises  signals  of  danger  over  every 
vice  on  which  a  human  life  has  been  wrecked, 
and  inspires  you  by  the  grand  beacon  lights  of 


152 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


the  scriptures,  and  makes  clear  the  only  way  of 
safety,  and  entreats  you  by  all  tlie  mercies  •>£ 
God  to  keep  in  the  deeps  of  His  love.  ''Other 
foundation  can  no  man  lay  than  that  which  is 
laid,  which  is  Jesus  Christ."  Many  peop'e  )f\y 
their  cwn  foundation  and  they  are  sand, 
when  the  storms  come  the  buildinj^  is  sw>  )t 
away  and  the  penniless  soul  floats  helplessly  on 
the  surging  tide  into  the  great  eternity.  Byron 
says, 

*'Ala8:  it  is  delusion  ail; 
The  future  cheats  us  from  afar, 
Nor  can  we  be  what  vve  rec^^ll, 
Nor  dare  we  think  on  what  we  are." 

The  Great  Architect  has  given  us  the  only 
foundation,  and  other  foundation  ca*i  no  man 
lay.  The  foundation  and  the  building  must  be 
in  proportion.  If  you  build  wealth  at  any  price, 
and  gain  social  and  political  influence  to  honor 
self  and  ignore  the  giver,  ''of  every  good  and 
perfect  gift"  you  are  building  on  the  sand,  and 
thirty  years  will  cheat  you  out  of  it  all.  You 
may  acquire  wealth,  and  be  successful  in  busi- 
ness and  in  your  profession,  and  be  admired 
for  your  genius,  but  beneath  it  all  there  is  an 
unrest  and  "an  aching  void  the  world  can  never 
fill."  The  bible  is  a  revelation  from  God,  and 
if  you  would  be  guided  by  Him,  and  know  and 
do  His  will  you  must  take  the  holy   book  as 


THE  MODEL  VOUNG  MAN 


153 


''the  man  of  your  counsel."  Many  people  fail 
because  they  ^-et  started  wr^m^;  Jesus  Christ  is 
the  only  f  )aM  latioti,  f\nd  the  Bible  is  the  only 
plan  and  specification  for  life's  buildino;,  and 
it  came  from  heaven  and  God  is  the  ar(d]itect. 
Young  men  put  the  Bible  not  only  in  your 
trunks  and  on  your  tables;  but  mold  and  build 
your  lives  by  it,  and  then  you  will  have  good 
success. 

BE  INI^USTRIOUS. 

Grod  has  made  man  to  be  industrious,  and  if 
he  is  indolent  he  cannot  be  happy.  He  puts 
the  iron  and  gold  and  silver  into  the  everlasting 
hills  where  we  must  dig  to  get  it,  and  the  wheat 
and  corn  where  we  must  labor  to  get  it,  and  all 
the  secrets  of  nature  and  our  civilization  are 
attainable  only  by  industry.  There  are  two 
classes  that  never  succeed  in  this  life;  the  bustl- 
ing do-nothing  and  the  idler.  The  lazy  man 
has  been  in  the  world  a  long  time  and  he  never 
changes.  Solomon  described  him  in  his  day. 
*'I  went  by  the  field  of  the  slothful,  and  by  the 
vineyard  of  the  man  void  of  understanding;  and 
lo!  it  was  all  grown  over  with  thorns,  and  net- 
tles had  covered  the  face  thereof,  and  the  stone 
wall  thereof  was  broken  down."  He  then  gives 
us  a  picture  of  the  lazy  man's  house.  ^'By  much 
slothf ulness  the  building  decayetb  ;  and  through 
idleness   of   the   hands   the   house  droppeth 


154 


MARKIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


through,"  I  have  seen  farms  and  houses  which 
answer  Solomon's  description  exactly.  When 
the  idler  moves  into  the  city  he  is  worse  than 
on  the  farm  for  then  he  loafs  in  the  way  of  peo- 
ple on  the  streets  and  interferes  with  other  peo- 
ple's business.  The  Marquis  of  Spinola  asked 
Sir  Horace  Vere,  ^'Pray  Sir  Horace  of  what  did 
your  brother  die?*'  The  frank  answer  was 
"He  died  of  haviiio-  nothing  to  do."  Kust  kills 
legions  of  men  physically,  socially  and  intellect- 
ually and  I  will  also  add  spiritually.  Every 
young  man  ouglit  to  have  a  definite  aim  and 
occupation  in  life  and  gird  up  the  loins  of  his 
energy  and  press  to  the  goal  of  success.  New- 
Ion  said  to  Dr.  Bently,  '^if  1  have  done  the  pub- 
lic any  service  it  is  due  to  nothing  but  indus- 
try and  patient  thought."  Martin  Luther,  John 
Wesley  and  Adam  Chirk  are  glittering  illustra- 
tions of  what  can  be  accomplished  by  industry. 
Our  most  successful  men  work  the  hardest,  they 
liit  the  iron  when  it  is  hot  and  when  it  is  cold 
they  hit  it  and  make  it  hot. 

THE  MODEL  Y0~JNG  MAN  WILL  STUDY  ECONOMY. 

Businen  men  pass  by  fops,  and  dudes,  and 
society  coxcombs  when  they  are  seeking  a  young 
man  to  help  ihem  in  business.  The  world 
stands  ready  t(^  applaud  the  young  man  who 
lives  witliin  his  inc'^nv\  an<l  who  has  the  hero- 
ism to  refase  the  useh  ss  luxuries  of  life.  The 


THE  MODEL  YOUNG  MAN 


155 


hardest  tlionsaiid  dollars  to  make  is  the  fiigt 
thousand,  after  that  money  helps  you  make 
more.  The  hundred  dollars  that  is  squandered 
on  cigarettes  today  if  cared  for  would  give  you 
in  twenty  years  the  luxuries  of  a  thottsand  dol- 
lars. The  sensible  young  man  will  keep  out  of 
debt,  will  deny  himseJf  many  indulgences  and 
will  not  boai'd  on  the  most  elegant  avenue 
merely  to  be  classed  among  society  young  men. 

THERE  IS  NO  MODEL  LIFE  WITHOUT  INTEGRITY. 

The  temptations  are  many  and  great  today  to 
sacrifice  principle  and  character  for  business 
and  worldly  emoluments.  Men  will  prostitute 
the  church  of  God,  the  church  of  their  fathers 
to  their  human  greed  and  selfish  aims.  They 
will  support  influential  churches  for  the  shek- 
els the  members  deposit  in  their  business. 
Others  are  indifferent  to  every  great  reform  and 
keep  mum  and  smother  convictions  and  strangle 
conscience  for  political  preferment  or  sordid 
gain.  The  crying  ne^'d  today  is  not  great  gen- 
erals on  the  battle  field,  but  men  of  great  in- 
tegrity to  champion  moral  conflicts  and  be  tlie 
Grants  and  Wellin^^tons  and  Garibaldies  to  do 
and  die  for  the  cause  of  right.  Luther  is  the 
plumed  knight  of  the  Reformation,  the  great 
apostle  of  Protestantism,  the  mighty  emancipa- 
tor of  the  religious  world,  and  all  because  of  his 
integrity,  ''God  helping  me  T  can't  do  other- 

V 


156 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


wise,"  Moses  was  the  greatest  man  of  the  Old 
Testament,  and  he  won  his  immoital  stature  hy 
integrity.  When  the  wealth  of  the  world  was 
laid  at  his  feet,  and  royalty  stood  ready  to  cro^^  n 
him  in  the  palace  he  espoused  the  cause  of  the 
colored  race  of  E^ypt  who  were  infinitely  lower 
thnn  the  slaves  of  our  own  South  land,  and  chose 
to  suffer  the  afflictions  of  the  people  of  God  be- 
cause it  was  right,  and  in  hravcn  tliey  sin^-  "the 
song  of  Moses  and  the  Lamb."  It  was  this 
principle  that  made  Elisha  and  Joi^^eph  nnd 
Paul  and  the  martyrs,  and  this  principle  ah  ne 
will  bring  the  world  to  Jesus  Christ.  All  read- 
ers of  history  will  remember  how  the  govern- 
ment of  Scotland  claimed  jurisdiction  over  th.e 
|)ulpits  of  tiie  Scottish  Oliurch.  Some  of  the 
ministers  resolved  to  form  a  free  church  and 
such  a  step  meant  that  they  should  give  up 
their  manses  and  tht  ir  support  and  d^^pend  i  u 
Providence.  On  tlie  eighteenth  of  May  18d3 
after  the  service  was  over  th.e  moderator  laid 
his  protest  on  the  table  and  started  for  the  door 
and  the  saintly  Chalmers  was  soon  by  his  side 
and  then  four  hundred  more  and  they  surrend- 
ered all  for  liberty  and  the  right.  The  spirit  of 
the  ancient  Covenanters  fired  their  hearts  and 
tlie  crowd  swung  their  hats  and  handkerchiefs 
and  thanked  God,  nnd  Scotland  was  free.  The  n 
the  four  hundred  lifted  up  their  voices  in  holv 


THE  MODEL  YOUNG  MAN 


trust  and  sang, 

''God  is  our  refuge  and  cur  streogth, 
In  straits  a  present  aid 
Therefore  althougb  the  earth  remove, 
We  will  not  be  afraid." 

Says. Dr.  Wise,  ^*The  moral  grandeur  of  this 
scene  is,  at  least  equal  to  any  recorded  facts  in 
the  history  of  man.  The  scene  owes  all  its  sub- 
limity to  the  fact  that  those  heroic  ministers 
were  sufficioitly  loyal  to  their  sense  of  duty  to 
prefer  the  loss  of  all  things  to  its  violation." 
In  the  store,  in  the  world,  in  the  church  the 
question  ev^er  confronts  every  young  man,  ''Je- 
sus or  Barabbas?"  In  the  face  of  every  bribery 
and  temptation  God  help  you  to  come  over  on 
the  side  of  the  Prince  of  Nazareth  and  like 
Luther  say,  ''God  helping  me  I  can't  do  other- 
wise." Let  not  poverty  discourage  you.  Let 
me  point  you  to  a  few  in  the  bright  galaxy  of 
Ihe  immortals  who  were  poor  boys,  but  who 
have  reached  the  dizzy  heights  of  success. 
Leon  Gambetta  the  statesman,  William  Ftoyd 
Garrison  the  reformer,  Olivn^  G  )ldsmith  the 
poet,  George  Peabo(!v  the  merchant,  George 
W^.  Childs  the  j  nirnalist,  Paul  the  missionary 
to  the  Gentile  world,  Luther  the  father  of  Prot- 
estantism and  Abraham  Lincoln  the  president. 
I  have  reared  before  you  a  cijlossal  pyramid  of 
character  tonight,  and  now  I  war  .  you  that 


158 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


"now  is  the  day  of  salvation."  This  is  tlie  day 
of  your  opportunity  wlien  your  blood  runs 
swiftly,  and  the  energies  of  youth  well  up  with- 
in you  for^the  fray.  Many  can  say  after  Pris- 
cilla  Leonard, 

The  key  of  yesterday 

I  threw  aw  a}'. 

And  now,  too  iate, 

Before  tomorrow's  close  locked  gate 

Helpless  I  stand — in  vain  to  pray ! 

In  vain  to  sorrow ! 

Only  the  key  of  yesterday 

Unlocks  tomorrow. 

Take  the  bible  as  your  ^uide,  build  your  life 
with  industry  and  economy  and  integrity,  pat- 
tern after  the  only  true  model — Jesus  Christ 
and  amidst  assembled  worlds,  and  the  applause 
of  angels  God  will  place  on  you  the  copestone 
of  his  own  "well  done  good  and  faithful." 


159 


The  Mistakes  of  Young  Men, 


Abhor  that  which  is  evil. — Paul. 

Evil  comnlanicatious  corrupt  j^ood  iiianners. — 
Solomon. 

Keep  good  company  and  yoa  shall  be  of  Uie 
numbei. — George  Herbert, 

Self-control  \z  reason's  girdlu,  and  passion's 
bridle. — Jeremy  Taylor. 

He  that  walketh  with  wise  men  shall  be  wis^' ; 
bu":  a  companion  of  tools  shall  be  destroyed  — Bible 

Her  house  is  the  way  to  hell,  going  down  to  the 
chambers  of  death, — Bible. 

A  false  balance  is  abomination  to  the  Lord  :  but 
a  just  weight  is  his  delight.— Solomon 

Look  not  upon  the  wine  when  it  is  r<d.  whiu 
it  giveth  his  color  in  ihe  cup,  when  it  ujoxt  tli  it- 
self aright.  A":  last  it  bitteth  like  a  serj)tnt,  and 
stingetli  like  an  adder. — Bible. 

We  have  a  great  interest  iu  youne  men,  po- 
ciety  has  and  so  has  tlie  church.  The  c(^m!i)u- 
iiity  in  which  you  reside  is  very  anxious  to    si  e 


160 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


you  develop  to  be  a  j)ure,  and  b  morable  and 
noble  man.  Society  stands  ready  to  crown  your 
brow  with  a  laurel  wreath  and  say  "well  done." 
Young  men  are  exposed  to  more  dangerous 
temptations  than  youn^-  women.  You  are  at 
the  parting  of  the  roads  in  a  truer  sense  than 
old  men,  and  as  you  pitch  your  tent  towards 
Sodom  or  righteousness  so  will  your  future  be. 
Some  horsemen  looking  at  a  colt  three  months 
old  can  tell  what  it  will  look  like  at  three  years, 
but  this  is  not  nearly  so  certain  as  to  predict 
the  future  of  the  fast  and  drinking  young  man, 
or  the  pure  and  virtuous.  The  Divine  Artist 
has  photographed  every  class  of  young  men, 
and  developed  them  to  the  finish.  Young  gen- 
tlemen hear  me  tonight  as  your  friend.  I  want 
to  warn  you  of  mistakes  which  many  young 
men  have  made. 

SOME  YOUNG  MEN  OVER  ESTIMATE  THEIR  STRENGTH 
AND  UNDERESTIMATE  THE  POWER  OF  SIN. 

"All  men  think  all  men  mortal  but  them- 
selves," so  all  young  men  think  all  young  men 
weak  in  certain  respects  but  themselves.  They 
censure  others  for  yielding  to  temptation,  and 
fancy  honestly  enough  that  they  would  not 
have  yielded.  The  young  men  who  have  fallen 
thought  your  thoughts  once.  The  fence  which 
surrounds  your  father's  farm  is  no  stronger 
than  the  weakest  panel ;  the  boiler  which  turns 


MISTAKES  OF  YOUNG  MEN 


191 


the  macbinery  in  yonr  isreat  factories  is  no 
Rtroneer  than  the  weakest  point.  T  met  a  man 
somp  time  since  who  stood  six  feet  two  inches 
hi2:h,  and  weicrhed  250  ponnds.  He  looked  to 
be  in  the  best  of  health.  He  was  not  corpuVnt 
but  heavy  boned  and  mnscnlar.  He  had  tre- 
mendous arms  and  a  liand  as  lar^e  as  a  dinner 
plate,  and  looked  as  if  he  could  walk  ofif  with 
two  men,  one  in  each  hand  at  arm's  leno^lh. 
T  overestimated  him,  for  he  had  a  weak  back 
and  could  lift  no  more  than  John  We.*ley  who 
only  weighed  122  pounds.  We  are  no  stronger 
than  our  weakest  point.  We  may  be  sin-proof 
ag-ainst  a  thousand  temptations,  and  yet  the 
next  one  ruin  us.  It  don't  require  many  weak 
points  in  a  man's  character  to  ruin  him,  one  is 
sufficient  to  blight  and  dam  him  .  Sin  is  power- 
ful. It  is  not  a  pimple  on  the  soul  that  might 
be  covered  with  a  piece  of  court  plaster,  but 
''that  wdiich  setteth  on  fire  the  whole  course  of 
nature,  and  it  is  set  on  fire  of  hell  "  Sin  that 
has  slaughtered  Samson  and  Solomon  and  that 
has  strewn  the  centuries  with  the  flowers  of 
our  race  cannot  be  overestimated.  ''Shun  the 
very  appearance  of  evil"  says  the  good  book. 
If  anything  has  the  appearance  of  evil,  if  the*^e 
is  the  least  suspicion,  get  over  on  the  other  side 
of  the  road  and  pass  not  by  it. 


162 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


ANOTHER  MIS;TAKE  IS  NOT  TO  TAKE  GOOD  ADVICE. 

I  admire  yoiintr  men  who  think  for  them- 
selves, youniy  men  who  nr^  like  a  cat  thrown 
out  of  an  upstairs  window  who  will  liofht  upon 
Iheirfeet  somewhere.  T  have  but  little  use  for 
men  who  are  simply  arms  and  leiJfs  for  s@me  one 
else.  I  sometimes  attend  political  meetiuirs  'o 
hear  the  speeches  and  listen  to  th^  ar^jfuments. 
Sometime  aufo  T  attended  a  rally  where  an  emi- 
nent speaker  made  a  splendid  address.  He  was 
a  Kepublican  and  weakened  his  address  by  re- 
peating a  time  and  threadbare  worn  phrase.  It 
was  ''A  Republican  was  f  born,  a  Republican 
was  I  raised  and  a  R<^publican  will  I  die."  The 
sense  conveyed  and  the  principle  was  good 
enough,  but  he  thou^zht  there  were  some  in  his 
audience  whose  brains  couldn't  do  much  with 
ars^ument,  and  who  were  a  success  with  senti- 
ment and  he  was  trying  to  L^ive  to  every  one  "a 
portion  of  meat  in  due  season  "  When  I  first 
got  acquairited  with  colored  people  I  thought 
they  were  all  nosed  and  eyed  alike.  A  large 
lady  weighingr  200  pounds  came  to  our  home  to 
work,  and  she  always  took  the  easiest  position 
to  do  her  work.  One  day  she  was  sitting  on 
the  floor  polishing  the  kitchen  stove,  and  pass- 
ing through  the  room  I  said  to  her  in  a  friendly 
way.  "to  what  church  do  you  belong?"  and  she 
replied  m  her  own  dialect,  "Methodist  bred,  and 


TAKES  OF  TOUNG  MEN  163 

Methodist  born  and  Methodist  till  I  die."  I 
thought  to  myself  what  brains.  We  have  an 
animal  in  tl^s  countr}  with  a  very  lar^e  head 
and  a  will  of  his  own  called  the  mule  and  he 
says,  ''a  mule  was  I  bred,  a  mule  was  I  born  and 
a  mule  will  I  be  till  1  die,"  I  believe  him. 
Younc:  men  think  for  yourselves  and  your  best 
thought  will  lead  you  to  take  the  best  advice. 
In  Fronde's  Caesar  we  read  ''it  waa  now  eleven 
in  the  fort  noon  Caesar  shook  off  his  uneasiness 
and  arose  to  ^o.  As  he  crossed  the  hall  his 
statue  fell  and  shivered  on  the  stones.  Some 
servants,  perhaps,  heard  whispers  and  wished 
to  warn  him.  As  he  still  passed  on  a  stranger 
thrust  a  scroll  into  his  hnnd,  and  be^rged  him 
to  read  it  on  the  spot.  It  contained  a  list  of  all 
the  conspirators  with  a  ^lear  account  of  the 
plot.  He  supposed  it  to  be  a  petition  and 
placed  it  carelessly  among  his  other  papers. 
The  fate  of  the  empire  hung  upon  a  thread,  but 
the  thread  was  not  broken."  The  fate  of  many 
a  young  man  hangs  upon  a  thread.  The  coun- 
sel Contained  in  two  lines  if  obeyed  would  mean 
his  life,  if  scorned  his  death.  "I  counsel  th<^e 
to  buy  of  me  gold  tried  in  the  fire  that  thou 
mayest  be  rich  and  white  raiment  that  thou 
mayest  be  clothed."  The  whole  book  of  Prov- 
erbs is  for  the  young  and  abounds  with  warn- 
ings and  counsels. 


164  MARRIAGE   AND  THE  HOME 


ANOTHER  MISTAKE  IS  TO  READ  BAD  BOOKS. 

Blindfold  me  and  take  me  iwio  any  home  in 
the  city,  and  then  show  me  the  papers  taken, 
the  books  read,  and  I  can  tell  you  the  interest 
taken  in  politics,  in  reli<2ion,  in  the  racetrack, 
and  in  the  sportiLo-  world,  and  £rive  yii  an  es- 
timate of  the  character  of  tlie  home.  Talmnge 
says,  "Who  can  estimate  the  power  of  a  ^J^ood 
book?  Benjamin  Franklin  said  that  his  read- 
intr  of  Cotton  Mather's  Essays  to  do  ^ood  in 
childhood  gave  him  holy  aspirations  for  all  the 
rest  of  his  life.  GeorLie  Law,  the  millionaire, 
declared  a  biography  he  r^^ad  in  childhood  gave 
him  all  his  subsequent  prosperity.  John  Angel 
James  stood  in  his  pulpit  at  Birmingham  and 
said  twci.ty-five  years  ago  a  lad  loaned  me  an 
infamous  book.  He  would  only  loan  it  to  n  e 
fifteen  minutes,  and  then  I  gave  it  back,  but 
the  book  has  haunted  me  like  a  spectre  ever 
since.  I  have  in  the  agony  of  my  soul,  (m  my 
knees  before  God,  prayed  that  . he  would  oblit- 
eiate  from  my  soul  the  memory  of  it;  but  I 
shall  carry  the  damage  of  it  until  the  day  of  my 
death.  The  assassin  of  Sir  William  Russei  de- 
clared he  got  the  inspiration  for  his  crime  by 
reading  ihe  novel  "Jack  Sheppard.''^  Homer's 
Illiad  made  Alexander  the  warrior.  Alexander 
said  so.  The  story  or  Alexander  made  Julias 
Caesar  and  Charles  the  twelfth,  both  men  of 


MISTAKES  OF  YOUNG  MEN 


165 


blood.  Have  you  in  yoar  pocket  or  in  your 
desk  at  business  a  bad  book,  a  bad  pamphlet? 
Ill  God's  name  I  warn  you  to  destroy  it.  In 
close  relation  to  bad  books  is  bad  company.  At 
St.  Augustine,  Florida,  I  was  much  interested 
in  observing  chamelions.  When  tney  were  on 
an  old  log  they  were  as  brown  as  the  log,  and 
when  on  the  grass  as  green  as  corn  in  the  month 
of  July.  They  take  the  same  color  as  the  ob- 
ject they  are  associated  with,  and  so  it  is  largely 
with  man.  We  can  never  forget  that  which  w<f 
learn  in  bad  society,  John  B.  Gougii  said,  "I 
have  confessed  before  God,  I  would  give  my 
ligl't  hand  tcn^j^ht  if  I  could  foiget  that  which 
I  have  learned  in  bad  company,  if  I  could  tear 
from  my  remembrance  the  scenes  which  I  have 
witnessed.  You  cannot,  I  believe  take  an  im- 
pure thought,  or  at  least  its  effect  when  it  has 
been  lodged  and  harbored  in  the  heart. ''^ 

ANOTHER  POPULAR  AND  OREAT  MISTAKE  IS  TO 
BEL!  EVE  THAT  A  LIFE  WRECKED  IN  SIN  CAN 
EVER  BE  WHAT  IT  WOULD  HA  VE  BEEN  WITHOUT 
THE  WRECK. 

A  life  which  has  sown  and  reaped  a  crop  of 
wild  oats  is  damaged  forever.  There  has  been 
placed  on  men  a  premium  in  this  coantry  who 
liave  been  in  the  gutter  and  then  have  become 
public  speakers.  The  man  for  your  model  is 
the  man  who  has  never  wallowed  in  the  dirt  of 


166  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 

sin.  Some  of  thesH,men  almost  glory  in  telling 
how  mean  they  have  been.  It  is  right  to  give 
God  the  glory  for  his  saving  grace.  Beecijer 
said  he  did  not  like  to  have  a  man  every  tim^ 
he  met  him  roll  up  the  leg  of  his  pants  and 
show  him  an  old  sore.  One  day  a  convict  in 
Joliet  picked  up  a  scrap  of  paper  from  the  cor- 
ridor on  which  were  these  lines: 

'•I  walked  throiicrh  the  woodland  meadow, 
Where  sweet  the  thru-lies  sinsr  ; 
And  found  on  a  hed  of  mosses 
A  bird  with  a  broken  wing. 
I  healed  its  wound,  and  each  morning 
It  sang  its  ohi  sweet  strain 
But  the  bird  with  a  bro^^  en  pinion, 
Never  soared  so  high  again. 

I  found  a  young  life  broken 

By  sin's  seductive  art: 

And  touched  with  a  Chri&tlike  pitv, 

I  loo  \  him  to  my  heart. 

He  lived  wirh  a  noble  purpose. 

And  struggled  not  in  vain  ; 

But  the  life  that  sin  had  stric  kened, 

Never  soared  so  higli  again. 

But  the  bird  with  a  broken  pinion. 
Kept  another  from  the  snare  ; 
And  the  life  that  sin  had  stricki  n, 
Raised  another  from  despair. 
Each  loss  has  i'is  compensation. 
There  i8  healing  for  every  pain  ; 
But  the  bird  with  a  broken  pinion. 
Never  soars  so  high  again.'' 


MISTAKES  OF  YOUNG  MEN 


197 


You  can  only  be  your  best  by  always  living 
your  best.  It  is  easy  to  be  a  destructionist,  it 
is  hard  to  be  a  constructionist,  and  takes  time 
and  sacrifice.  It  only  took  Chicago  three  days 
to  burn  down,  it  took  years  to  rebuild  it.  One 
nij^lit  can  ruin  more  character  than  years  can 
rebuild. 

THE  GREATEST  MISTAKE  POSSIBLE  TO  ANY  YOUNG 
MAN  IS  TO  REFUSE  CHRIST  AS  HIS  SAVIOUR. 

There  are  two  places  open  to  you  in  the  money 
world.  In  the  first  place  there  appears  to  be 
more  money,  more  pleasure  and  liberty;  in  the 
second  there  appears  to  be  less  pay  at  first,  but 
it  gets  better  and  after  awhile  you  become  a 
pnrtner  in  tlie  firm  and  a  millionaire.  Which 
will  you  take?  There  are  two  positions  offered 
every  young  man  in  life.  The  world  offers  the 
first,  more  money,  pleasure  and  risk,  and  Christ 
offers  the  next  pLace.  He  offers  you  a  good  po- 
sition, and  a  partnership  in  his  firm,  and  the 
unsearchable  riches  of  the  kingdom  Joseph 
accepted  Christ's  offer  and  the  world  pitied 
him  a  slave  in  prison  and  without  a  coat  to  his 
back.  Wait,  until  God  finishes  the  man,  and 
he  is  Egypt's  greatest  man  and  kings  bow  down 
before  him.  Moses  accepted  Christ's  offer  and 
turned  his  back  upon  wealth  and  the  luxuries 
of  the  palace,  but  wait  until  God  promotes  him. 
He  makes  him  Israel's  redeemer,  and  sends  his 


168 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


angels  to  make  his  errave  on  Mount  Nebo,  and 
then  arrays  him  with  o:lory  on  the  Moant  of 
Transfis:uration,  and  the  last  glimpse  we  get 
of  him  is  in  heaven  where  there  is  only  one 
name  coupled  with  the  Son  of  God  in  redemp- 
tion's song,  and  that  is  the  name  of  Moses 
*'They  sing  the  song  of  Moses  and  the  Lamb." 
What  is  your  choice?  I  believe  that  the  Son 
of  God  looks  on  you  tonight  and  loves  you  and 
commissions  me  to  invite  you,  ''Son  give  me 
thine  heart."  You  have  loved  ones  whose 
hearts  you  can  ravish  with  joy  by  confessing 
Christ.  Let  some  waiting  angel  ply  his  pinions 
and  carry  home  the  news  to  your  sainted  dear 
ones  and  there  will  be  great  joy  in  heaven. 
May  God  send  great  conviction,  and  great 
blessings  upon  you  my  brothers.  Amen. 


169 


Pushing  to  Front. 

OR  HOW  YOUNG  MEN  AND  WOMEN  WITH  NO  CHANCE 
MAY  GET  TO  THE  FRONT. 

This  one  'hing  I  do,  forgettiog  those  things 
which  are  behind,  and  reaching  forth  unto  those 
things  which  are  before  1  press  toward  tihe  mark 
for  the  prize  of  the  high  caUing  of  God  in  Christ 
Jesus. — Paul. 

Things  don't  turn  up  in  this  world  until  some- 
body turns  them  up. — Garfield. 

By  the  street  of  by  and  by  one  arrives  at  the 
house  of  never. — Cervantes. 

"The  iron  will  cf  one  stout  heart  shall  make  a 
thousand  quail.'" 

With  malice  toward  none,  with  charity  for  all, 

with  firmness  in  the  right  as  God  gives  us  to  see 

the  right  let  us  strive  on  to  finish  the  work  we  are 
in.  —  Lincoln. 

Lost:  Somewhere  between  sunrise  and  ?iunset, 
two  golden  ho':irs,  each  set  with  sixty  diamond 
minutes.  No  reward  is  offered  for  they  are  gone 
forever. — Horace  Mann. 

Every  young  man  worthy  of  the  name  desires 
to  push  to  the  front.  Every  minister,  lawyer, 
physician,   mechanic   and   farmer   ought  to 


170 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


strive  for  the  front  ranks  in  his  profession  or 
business.  We  ouiyht  to  study  the  hiii^hest  mod- 
els and  as  we  use  the  steam  and  electricity  and 
^reat  inventions  of  the  a^^e  to  aid  us  to  success 
so  we  should  use  the  mental  and  moral  steam 
and  electricity  which  has  made  men  fi-mons. 
Helen  Hunt  Jackson  said  to  a  friend,  "Have 
you  ever  tested  the  advantai^es  of  an  analytical 
reading  of  some  writer  of  finished  style?  There 
is  a  little  book  called  Out- Door  Papers,  by 
Went  worth  Higginson,  that  is  one  of  the  most 
perfect  specimens  of  literary  composition  in  the 
English  language.  I  go  to  it  as  a  text  bnok." 
The  problems  of  success  in  life,  of  how  to  make 
the  best  out  of  it,  of  how  to  build  character 
concern  the  millions,  and  I  shall  illustrate  my 
subject  from  the  lives  of  illustrious  men.  It  is 
a  great  privilege  to  sit  in  the  study,  or  in  medi- 
tation and  loose  sight  of  the  world  for  the  time 
being  while  you  converse  with  men  who  have 
trampled  beneath  their  feet  all  opposition,  and 
who  have  waved  the  palm  of  victory  on  the  pin- 
nacle of  the  highest  success.  The  apostle  Paul 
is  one  of  the  most  inspiring  men  this  world  has 
ever  seen.  Let  us  tonight  study  this  great 
master,  analyze  his  character  and  learn  wherin 
his  success. 

HE  WAS  A  MAN  OF  IRON  WILL. 

The  man  of  modern  times  who  resembles  him 


PUSHING  TO  THE  FRONT 


171 


most  in  this  respect  is  Bismarck.  A  writer  in 
the  Eclectic  Magazine  says,  "there  are  three 
kinds  of  people  in  the  world,  the  wills,  the 
won'ts,  and  the  can'ts.  The  first  accomplish 
everything,  the  second  oppose  everything,  the 
third  fail  in  everything.*'  In  every  church  you 
will  find  the  can'ts,  the  won'ts  and  the  wills, 
and  in  the  church  of  Jesus  Christ  from  the  days 
of  Paul  to  the  days  of  Luther  and  of  Wesley 
the  wills  have  planted  the  standard  of  the  cross 
on  the  heights  of  the  enemy,  and  captured  great 
heathen  nations  in  the  name  of  the  Christ. 
From  the  days  of  Napoleon  Bonaparte  to  the 
days  of  Ulysses  S.  Grant  the  wills  have  said, 
"there  shall  be  no  Alps,"  and  "On  to  Rich- 
mond," and  "unconditional  surrender,"  and  they 
have  won  the  day.  You  may  not  have  Grant's 
Richmond  to  reach,  or  Napoleon's  Alps  to  cross, 
but  you  have  an  Alps  or  Richmond  in  your 
own  life  to  conquer,  and  whether  it  be  in  finance, 
or  in  education,  or  in  your  disposition  you  can 
conquer  if  you  have  PauPs  invincible  spirit. 

LINKED  WITH  HI8  IRON  WILL  WAS  AN  OMNIPOTENT 
FAITH. 

There  is  a  pusillanimous  faith  and  preaching 
today  that  develops  weaklings.  It  comes  in 
sugar-coated  essays,  and  surfcice  sentimentalism 
about  broadness  and  charity  and    liberty  and 


172 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


to  pay  bis  way.  His  next  term  he  started  to 
school  with  only  ten  cents  in  his  pocket.  He 
engaged  board,  fuel  and  li^ht  of  a  carpenter  for 
one  dollar  and  six  cents  per  week  with  the  priv- 
ilege of  working  on  Saturdays.  Be  pinned 
fifty-one  boards  the  first  Saturday  and  <  arned 
one  dollar  and  two  cents.  At  the  close  of  the 
term  he  had  three  dollRrs  in  his  pocket.  He 
next  taught  school  and  then  graduated  in  Will- 
iam's College.  He  went  to  the  State  Senate  at 
26,  and  at  23  was  in  Congress,  and  twenty- seven 
years  from  the  time  he  was  janitor  in  coll'^ge 
James  A.  Garfield  became  president  of  these 
United  States.  Paul  had  a  poor  oppf)rtuti  ity 
Public  opinion  was  against  him,  and  the  whole 
world,  and  no  press,  no  protection  from 
the  mob,  his  back  bared  and  flogged  until  the 
soil  was  baptised  with  his  blood  and  yet  he 
cries  out,  "None  of  these  things  move  me."  He 
seizes  every  opportunity  to  preach  Clirist,  and 
amidst  the  fiercest  opposition  that  ever  con- 
fronted man  he  continues  until  he  is  thrown 
into  an  old  well  for  a  prison  from  whence  he  is 
taken  in  old  age,  and  his  glory  crowned  head 
removed  from  his  body  by  a  murderer.  He 
made  the  opportunity  and  has  left  the  impress 
of  his  great  soul  upon  the  religious  worMfor  all 
time.  There  are  thousands  of  opportunities  in 
Sunday  School  work,  in  visiting  the  stranger, 


PUSHING  TO  THE  FRONT 


178 


p:rows  eloquent  on  the  narrowness  of  creed.  A 
man  who  don't  believe  in  something  can  never 
bring  things  to  pass.  Paul  believed  in  Jesus 
Christ  as  the  world's  only  salvation,  he  believed 
in  conversion,  in  the  damnable  heinousness  of 
sin,  and  in  the  veritit  s  (jf  the  gospel.  To  him 
they  were  all  real,  and  he  had  a  great  zenl  and 
effort  and  conviction  as  the  l'»^-icHl  outcome  of 
his  great  faith.  N(»  lunw  can  ritford  to  be  broad- 
er tlian  Je.sus  Chrift  rind  his  gospel  and  any- 
thing broader  th?!n  that  i.-^  relii.'i(»us  anarchy. 

PAUr.  CoNCb:NTKATED  ITIS;  EFFORTS. 
''This  one  thitiLi"  I  d' T  like  to  e^td  the 
man  of  one  book,  and  the  m  o i  wh'>  !s  u-h(  )•  <  f 
a  hundred  books  in  this  a. e  fn  i  w  rthy  :<>  be 
read.  Paul  put  his  wliole  t-oul  in  one  thenie 
for  life.  ai!(!  R«  Ihrcl.ild  >j;i<l  in  fiddr^  ssii^g 
young  men.  ''Slick  to  one  1  usineKs  y  nng  man 
A  man  in  London  put  "U  Ins  siun.  ''Go^ds  re- 
moved, messages  takf^n.  cari)ets  beaten,  and 
]K)etry  compesed  on  any  subject  Moii^^ieur 
Kenard  of  Paris  advertised.  ''A  public  scriiie, 
vvdio  digests  accounts,  explains  the  language  of 
flowers,  and  sells  fried  potatoes.'-  Scattei-ation 
was  the  name  of  the  disease  that  killed  tliese 
advertisers.  Time  is  to(3  short  for  any  man  to 
be  master  of  all  trades.  The  man  who  suc- 
ceeds today  is  the  man  who  puts  his  whole  en- 
ergy on  one  subject,  or  on  one  department  of  u 


174 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


p^o  five  hundred  leai^ues  to  talk  to  a  man  of 
getiius  whom  I  had  not  seen  before."  The  men 
and  women  who  have  accomplished  ^reatthinp^s 
in  life  are  those  who  have  been  absorbed  in  their 
work.  No  man  can  preach  a  s^reat  sermon,  or 
do  a  great  work  unless  he  is  inspired,  unless  his 
heart  glows  with  holy  fervor.  You  are  ready 
to  say  that  all  cannot  be  Bethovens.  or  Hugos 
or  Gladstones  or  Napoleons;  that  all  have  not 
the  opportunity.  It  is  true  we  all  cannot  be 
so  great  as  the  names  you  have  mentioned  and 
God  never  designed  you  should  be.  He  who 
made  the  grasses  of  the  fields  with  no  two 
spears  alike,  and  Ihe  leaves  of  the  trees  of 
variety  so  great  that  we  are  lost  in  infinity,  and 
the  worlds  innumerable  and  no  two  alike,  never 
duplicated  man.  He  has  a  myriad  patterns  in 
the  musical,  and  business  and  mental  worlds 
that  have  never  appeared  in  divine  man,  and 
you  are  born  with  one  of  these  patterns  within 
your  reach,  and  it  is  yours  with  a  life  on  fiie 
with  a  holy  zeal  to  press  on  and  win  the  Water- 
loo of  your  immortality. 

MAKE  THE  OPPORTUNITY. 

Weaklings  find  no  opportunity  while  strong 
men  make  them.  I  will  name  to  you  a  few  men 
who  had  no  opportunity  in  life  but  who  made 
great  opportunities.  A  poor  boy  said,  ''What 
has  been  done  can  be  done  again,"  and  that 


PUSHING  TO  THE  PRONT 


175 


rocY  boy  became  Lord  Beaconsfield,  England's 
preat  Prime  Minister.  Theodore  Parker  said 
to  his  father  one  day,  ^'May  I  have  a  holiday 
tomorrow?"  It  was  a  sultry  Au^rnst  day  and  he 
took  for  his  holiday  a  ten  miles  walk  to  Harvard 
Colleee,  and  passed  his  entrance  examination- 
His  father  was  too  poor  to  g-et  him  books,  or 
send  him  to  collesre  so  he  rose  in  the  mornings 
before  sunrise  and  picked  bushels  of  berries  and 
sold  them  in  Boston  and  bought  a  Latin  die- 
tionarv  with  them.  He  mnde  the  opportunity. 
Abraham  Lincoln  walked  six  miles  to  borrow  a 
era rr mar,  fird  when  he  got  home  he  burned 
shavings  one  after  another  to  afford  him  light 
with  which  to  study  it.  Daniel  Webster  could 
not  recite  when  a  boy  at  school  and  often  went 
home  and  wept  with  mortification.  Next  to 
Patrick  Henry  he  became  America'^s  most  brill- 
iant orator.  John  Wannamaker  walked  four 
miles  to  Philadelphia  every  day  and  worked 
for  one  dollar  and  twenty-five  cents  per  week. 
P.  T.  Barnum  rode  a  horse  for  ten  cents  a  day. 
They  made  the  opportunity.  I  will  mention 
another  poor  boy  brought  up  in  the  backwoods 
of  Ohio.  His  mother  was  a  widow  struggling 
to  keep  the  wolf  of  hunger  from  the  door. 
The  boy  borrowed  and  read  books  and  at  six- 
teen  was  a  mule  driver.  He  then  went  to  an 
academy  and  swept  the  floors  and  rang  the  bel^ 


176 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


subject.  Steam  was  always  here  but  it  never 
moved  the  world  until  it  was  harnessed  down. 
Many  men  have  had  ^reat  ability,  and  would 
have  moved  the  world  had  they  concentrated 
their  efforts,  had  they  put  the  trolley  on  the 
wire  and  then  moved  ahead.  The  men  of  spe- 
cific and  definite  work  are  the  men  of  force. 
Sydney  Smith  said  of  Daniel  Webster  that  he, 
"Struck  m©  much  like  a  steam  eno:ine  in  trous- 
ers," The  ^reat  apostle  made  Christ  his  one 
great  theme,  "God  forbid  that  I  glory  save  in 
the  cross  of  our  Lord  Jesus  Christ."  Aim  high 
but  have  a  definite  aim  for  the  ^reat  successes 
in  every  department  of  life  have  been  attained 
by  men  with  a  single  aim  and  a  great  purpose. 

PAUL  WAS  IN  EARNEST. 

He  says,  "T  press  towards  the  mark  for  the 
prize  of  the  high  calling  in  Christ  Jesus."  One 
earnest  man  will  accomplish  more  in  any  call- 
ing than  twenty  lukewarm  men.  There  are 
ministers  of  the  gospel  sitting  on  their  degrees^ 
and  on  their  dignity  and  reputation  and  who 
are  lamentable  failures  for  lack  of  energy.  Vic- 
tor Hugo  locked  up  his  clothes  while  writing 
*^Notre  Dame,"  that  he  might  not  leave  his  work 
until  it  was  finished.  Madame  de  Stael  said  to 
a  friend,  "If  it  were  not  for  respect  for  human 
opinion  I  would  not  open  my  window  to  see  the 
Bay  of  Naples  for  the  first  time,  while  I  would 


PUSHING  TO  THE  FRONT 


177 


and  in  missionary  enterprise  waiting  for  some 
one  to  open  the  door.  I  blush  tor  strong  men 
who  can't  walk  a  mile  to  church,  and  for  help- 
less spiritual  infants  who  are  crying  and  fretting 
for  some  church  mother  to  carry  them  on  a  pil- 
low of  down  into  the  kingdom.  God  can  never 
save  the  world  with  church  babies,  he  must 
have  men  and  women  of  the  Pauline  makeup. 

WITH  PAUL  CONSCIENCE  WAS  SUPREME. 

He  said,  ''Lord  what  wilt  thou  have  me  to 
do?"  His  conscience  was  on  the  throne  and  it 
was  supreme.  He  never  insulted  Grod  by  offer- 
ing an  apology  to  men  for  doing  what  was  right. 
He  was  a  man  who  rested  on  the  bedrock  of 
sincerity.  The  great  need  of  this  age  is  inde- 
pendent and  sincere  men.  We  have  been  ton 
long  on  the  dull  monotonous  prairie  instead 
of  the  mountain  range  with  jotting  peaks  of 
individuality,  and  sincerity  and  conscience 
jostling  the  stars  in  the  azure  blue  and  reach- 
ing in  placid  rest  the  very  throne  of  God. 

''What  conscience  dictates  to  be  done 
Or  warns  me  not  to  do, 
This,  teach  me  more  than  hell  to  shun, 
That,  more  than  Heav'n  pursue." 

There  never  was  an  age  that  called  more  loud  - 
ly  for  men  like  Paul  and  William  Floyd  Garri- 
son to  strike  for  liberty  than  the  present.  The 
great  liquor  traffic  is  greater  than  slavery,  th  e 


182 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


Wbitefield  be2:an  their  great  careers  in  college, 
Napoleon  coiiquered  Italy  at  twenty-one,  Victor 
Hugo  wrote  a  tragedy  at  fifteen,  and  Luther  was 
triumphant  at  twenty-fivCc  ^'Remember  thy 
Creator,  now  in  the  days  of  thy  youth."  Old  age 
is  the  silver  period  of  life,  youth  the  diamond. 
If  you  want  the  diamond  life  when  most  can  be 
accomplished,  and  when  the  greatest  character 
can  be  attained  seize  the  dicvmond  opportunity. 
''On  the  great  clock  of  time  there  is  but  one  word 
— now.*'  ''Behold,  now,  is  the  day  of  salvation." 
Amen. 


183 


The  Ideal  Young  Woman. 

"She  hath  done  what  she  could/' 

l.aet  at  His  cross  and  earhest  at  his  grave. — 
Barrett, 

Men  need  not  try  where  women  fail. — Euripides. 

Girls  we  love  for  what  they  are,  young  men  for 
what  they  promise  to  be. — Goetlse, 

If  woiuen  lost  US  Eden,  such  as  she  alone  can 
restore  it  — U'hittier. 

E:irth  has  nothing  more  tender  than  a  woinan's 
iieart,  whe:i  it  is  the  ahodu  of  [)iety. — Luther. 

I  he  king's  (luucrhter  is  ail  i^lorious  within:  her 
clothing  is  of  wrought  gohi.  —  David. 

rh'V  are  as  heaven  m;ide  them,  handsome 
enouuHi.  if  they  be  good  enough;  for  handsome  is 
th.'t  handsorne  does. — Goldsmith. 

That  ovT  daughters  may  be  as  corner  stones, 
[)  'li^hed  after  the  similitude  of  a  palace. — David. 

I  have  quoted  to  you  6ome  wise  sayings  of 
great  men  concern iug  women.  know  of  no 
better  standard  by  whicli  to  judge  the  purity, 
and  civilization  and  intelligence  of  any  age  than 


180 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


olutions  today  and  doti't  act,  and  the  day  of  op- 
portunity is  gone  and  we  cli?ise  all  our  lives  af- 
ter tomorrow  and  never  catch  it.  We  have  the 
open  door  today  which  unlocks  the  situation  of 
tomorrow  and  we  throw  away  the  key  when  we 
refuse  to  act.  John  B.  Gough  used  to  say  that 
a  great  many  people  had  three  hands,  "A  right 
hand,  a  left  hand  and  a  little  behindhand." 
His  terse  saying  is  forcibly  illustrated  by  a 
brakeman  named  Joe  Stoker.  He  was  an  easy 
going  man  and  visited  the  flat  bottle  occasion 
ally.  One  evening  in  a  heavy  snow  storm  his 
train  was  late.  Between  two  stations  the  train 
halted  quickly.  The  engine  had  blown  out  its 
cylinder  head,  and  an  express  was  due  in  a  few 
moments  on  the  same  track.  Joe  was  ordered 
by  the  conductor  to  take  a  red  light  back,  but 
he  replied,  ''There's  no  hurry."  and  continued, 
"wait  until  I  get  my  overcoat  on."  The  con- 
ductor answered  gravely,  ''Don't  stop  a  moment 
Joe.  The  express  is  due."  "All  right,"  said 
Joe,  but  he  did  not  hurry,  he  stopped  to  put  his 
coat  on  and  then  took  another  sip  and  moved 
leisurely  down  the  track.  He  had  gone  scarcely 
ten  paces  when  he  heard  the  express.  Then 
he  ran  for  the  curve,  but  it  was  too  late.  The 
standing  train  was  telescoped,  and  the  shrieks 
of  dying  and  tortured  passengers  and  the  hiss- 
ing steam  drove  him  insane.    He  ran  away  and 


THE  IDEAL  YOUNG  WOMAN 


181 


was  found  on  the  morrow  in  a  barn  swinging 
his  lantern  i)  fore  aa  imaginary  train,  and  cry- 
ing, ''Oh,  that  1  had."  He  was  taken  to  an  in- 
sane asylum  and  in  that  sad  place  the  saddest 
cry  and  moan  was  from  Joe,  "Oh,  that  I  had," 
''Oh  that  1  had."  Th@  young  man  who  takes  to 
the  drink  and  tramples  his  mother's  wishes  be- 
neath his  feet,  when  her  life  is  wrecked  and  her 
Jieart  is  broken  and  he  comes  home  sober  to  see 
%e  precious  dust  laid  away  will  cry  out  in  soli- 
tude for  years  to  come,  "Ob,  that  I  had."  And 
on  and  on  as  long  as  the  memory  of  the  old  home, 
and  the  angel  form  wake  up  his  sleeping  soul 
the  cry  will  be,  "Oh,  that  I  harl  "  The  invita- 
tion comes  to  yon  toniglit  from  the  Blessed  One, 
''Behold,  now  is  the  accepted  time,  behold,  now 
is  the  dny  of  salvation,"  and  yon  aiiswer  '•n<^> 
hurry,  lime  enough  yet."  In  ?{fter  years  when 
life  is  wre-'ked,  and  you  aie  an  outcast  and  a 
slave  to  evil,  and  your  mnnhoo  1  and  woman- 
hood is  all  defaced  within  and  without,  you  will 
think  of  the  day  of  your  oppr>rtunity  in  a  lr)v- 
ing  home  and  in  the  old  church  and  cry  out, 
"Oh,  that  I  had  " 

'*Thisday  we  fashion  Destiny,  our  web  of  Fate  we  spin, 
This  day  for  all  hereafter,  choose  we  holiness  or  sin." 

— Whittier. 

Youth  is  the  ruby  and  diamond  period  of  life. 
It  is  the  time  of  ambition,  of  enthusiasm,  of 
oyous  heart,  and  warm   blood.    Wesley  and 


178 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


torturing  of  human  beings  in  the  Southland  by 
the  hells  of  craelty  and  injustice,  the  social 
leper  plagues  of  our  cities,  and  the  corrupting 
influence  of  money.  The  world  demands  men 
of  sacrifice  and  heroism  and  conscience. 

PAUL  HAD  GOOD  JUDGEMENT. 

I  verily  believe  some  men  can  never  have 
good  common  sense,  they  were  born  without  it 
and  while  education  may  help,  it  cannot  create 
it.  (Prison  Swett  Marden  says,  three  college 
graduates  were  found  working  on  a  sheep  farm 
in  Australia,  one  from  Oxford,  one  from  Cam- 
bridge and  the  other  horn  a  Grerman  University. 
Trained  to  lead  men  they  drove  sheep.  The 
owner  of  the  farm  wis  an  ignorant,  course  sheep- 
raiser.  His  three  hired  graduates  could  speak 
foreign  hinguages,  and  discuss  theories  of  polit- 
ical economy  and  philosophy,  but  he  could  make 
money.  Even  the  University  could  not  supply 
conunou  sense.  It  was  ''culture  against  ignor- 
ance; the  college  against  the  ranch;  and  the 
ranch  bent  every  time."  These  young  men 
were  book- men  without  pi'actical  knowledge. 
They  illustrated  Beecher's  farm  experience. 
He  had  a  farm  of  thirty-six  acres  called  the 
Peokshili  farm.  Mark  Twain  said  he  ran  it  by 
the  book  His  special  weakness  was  liogs.  He 
buys  the  original  pig  for  a  dolkar  and  a  linlf,  and 
foed.^  him  f')rty  bushels  of  corn  and  then  sells 


PUSEJNG  TO  THE  FEONT 


171) 


him  for  about  nine  dollars.  This  is  the  only 
crop  he  ever  makes  any  money  in.  He  looses 
on  the  corn  bat  makes  seven  dollars  and  a  half 
on  the  hoo'.  Beeclier  was  a  snecess  at  his  legit- 
imate calling,  but  these  three  young  graduates 
lacked  the  sixth  sense  which  is  common  sense. 
The  Apostle  knew  books  but  he  knew  men  also, 
and  won  his  laurels  out  in  the  world  and  learned 
living  men  as  well  as  printed  books. 

HE  LAID  GREAT  STRESS  ON  THE  NOW. 

He  said,  "I  press  "  He  won  all  his  victories 
in  the  present  tense.  All  great  men  have  been 
prompt  men.  Napoleon  valued  what  he  called 
the,  *'nick  of  time."  He  invited  his  marshals 
to  dine  and  began  on  time;  they  arrived  just  as 
he  finished.  "Gentlemen,"  said  he,  "It  is  now 
past  dinner  and  we  will  immediately  proceed  to 
business."  Washington  was  very  much  like 
Napoleon  in  this  respect.  New  members  of 
Congress  who  were  invited  to  dine  would  some- 
times be  late,  and  find  the  President  eating 
when  he  would  say,  "My  cook  never  asks  if  the 
visitors  have  arrived,  but  if  the  hour  has  ar- 
rived." It  would  be*  a  great  blessing  if  many 
singers,  and  society  people,  ?nd  business  men, 
and  church  people  were  sent  to  the  public 
schools  again  to  learn  that  nine  o'clock  is  nine 
o'clock  and  not  ten,  "The  mill  can  never  grind 
with  the  waters  that  are  past."    We  make  res- 


184 


MAKEIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


by  hei  women.  Blindfold  me  and  placp  me  in 
a  room,  and  then  pjive  me  a  true  photograph  of 
the  women  of  any  age,  of  their  culture  of  brain 
and  heart,  and  I  will  name. to  you  the  age  in 
which  they  lived.  Woman  was  last  at  the  cross 
and  first  at  the  grave  of  the  Christ,  she  was  the 
first  to  preach  the  gospel  of  the  resurrection, 
she  was  the  mother  of  the  Son  of  man,  she  was 
the  climax  of  God's  creative  works,  and  has 
opened  the  door  to  heathen  lands,  and  let  in 
the  gospel  light  to  millions  of  her  oppressed 
sisters. 

WOMAN    HAS    BEEN    LONG    DEBARRED    OF  HER 
KINGDOM. 

Man  has  kept  her  out  of  her  inheritar.'ce,  and 
cheated  her  out  of  her  birthright,  and  made 
her  a  slave  for  thousands  of  years.  It  would 
not  be  just  to  say  that  man  has  done  this  with 
an  enlightened  conscience  and  with  cruel  de- 
sign, but  for  want  of  the  Christ  gospel  and  the 
Christ  love.  We  turn  to  the  Orient  where  the 
Sun  rises,  and  there  the  sun  of  civilization  sets 
and  has  been  for  the  long  dark  centuries.  There 
is  no  night  to  be  compared  to  the  night  of 
heathenism.  The  baby  girl  in  China  finds  no 
tender  welcome,  and  often  the  little  angel  is  de- 
stroyed; the  women  in  India  are  the  slaves  of 
the  men,  and  in  a  darker  period  have  been 
burned  to  death  on  the  bodies  of  their  hus- 


THE  IDEAL  YOUNG  WOMAN 


185 


bands,  and  have  never  been  treated  as  mental 
and  iniinortal  beings.  It  has  been  a  long  night 
of  social  malaria,  and  the  damps  and  miasmas 
(  f  awful  woe;  it  has  been  a  long  night  of  tortu- 
ous cruelty  and  untold  barbarity.  We  have 
given  you  a  picture  of  churchless,  bibleless  and 
Christless  ra.ces.  Turn  ^'rom  the  land  of  the 
minaret  to  the  land  of  cl lurches,  from  the  land 
of  tiie  Koran  to  the  land  of  the  bible,  from  the 
land  of  Bluiddism  and  Bralimanism  and  Parsee- 
ism  and  Mohammedanism  to  the  lands  of  the 
gospel  of  Jesus  Christ,  and  surely  here  we  shall 
find  man  unbolting  the  door  to  woman's  king- 
dom, and  giving  her  the  right  of  way  to  her 
lawful  inheritance.  In  the  early  part  of  this 
century  the  chief  occupation  of  woman  v^as  to 
spin  and  weave  and  knit  and  embroider  and  cut 
and  make  clothing  for  the  family.  She  also 
helped  her  husband  and  often  worked  with  him 
in  the  field  and  assisted  him  in  the  small  store. 
The  idea  of  making  money  except  in  a  very 
small  way  was  never  thought  of.  The  women 
had  but  few  property  rights.  They  could  not 
have  a  legal  right  to  their  own  earnings,  or 
even  their  own  belongings  until  the 
Women's  Property  Act  in  England  and  Ameri- 
ca w^as  passed.  Woman  was  shut  out  from  most 
of  the  professions  and  the  doors  of  colleges 
largely  closed  against  her     It  is  better  today. 


183 


marrlagh:  and  rai^  homs 


The  doors  to  all  professions  are  open  to  her, 
and  the  door  to  the  ballot  box  is  more  than 
ajar  for  in  some  states  she  has  the  right  of  fran- 
chise. She  has  rights  today  but  n(jt  all  her 
property  rights.  If  a  man  who  has  no  children 
dies  in  Illinois  his  male  relatives  can  come  in 
and  share  the  property  with  his  w^ife  while  in 
the  state  of  Colorado  she  inherits  all  his  estate. 
Today  more  than  half  the  telegraph  operators 
are  women,  two-thirds  the  school  teachers  are 
women  and  three-fourths  the  type-writers  are 
women.  The  male  teacher  averages  forty-five 
dollars  per  month  whiie  the  female  teacher  av- 
erages only  thirty  dollars  per  month.  The 
clerks  in  the  government  employ  in  Washing- 
ton if  males  get  from  nine  to  eighteen  hundred 
dollars  per  year  while  the  female  clerks  get 
from  six  to  twelve  hundred  per  year.  Today 
one  of  the  largest  fruit  growers  in  California  is 
a  woman,  and  Miss  Austin  has  created  the  rai- 
son  industry.  Miss  Sarah  Cooper  stands  at  the 
head  of  the  kindergarten  movement.  Efficiency 
and  not  sex  will  unlock  tlie  d<3ors  of  the  busi- 
ness and  professional  worlds  of  tomorrow. 

YOUNG  WOMEN  ARE  EXPOSED  TO  GKEAT  DANGERS. 

The  young  woman  who  is  incompetent  to 
manage  even  a  small  business  at  the  age  of 
eighteen  is  expected  to  be  wise  enough  to  ac- 
cept or  reject  a  partner  for  life.    If  she  makes  a 


THE  irEAL  YOUNG  \VOMAN 


187 


mistake  it  is  a  fatal  one  indeed.  Even  an.  im- 
prudent act  on  the  part  of  a  younu:  woman  is 
often  commented  on  with  heartless  cruelty. 
Sometimes  girls  are  coerced  into  matrimony, 
a  ad  that  to  marry  the  carcass  of  an  old  man  be- 
cause he  has  money,  and  it  is  no  surprise  that 
we  have  so  many  divorces  and  elopements.  An- 
otlier  danger  lies  in  the  fact  that  the  young 
W(mian  is  often  taught  to  represent  Hit-  showy 
in  phice  of  the  real.  If  in  some  ages  the  dres.^ 
of  half  dressed  women  has  been  disgraceful,  and 
in  otlier  ages  the  extravagance  without  limit  the 
men  are  chargeable  with  the  fashions  for  they 
have  helped  to  make  the  fashions  for  they  have 
helped  to  make  them  by  their  admiration  of 
them.  A  lady  asked  Rev.  John  Newton  for  the 
best  rule  for  women  to  observe  in  dress.  He 
replied,  "Madam,  so  dress,  and  so  conduct  yo^M-- 
self,  that  persons  who  have  been  in  your  coil;- 
pany  shall  not  recollect  what  you  had  on."  U. 
must  ever  remain  that  a  woman  with  a  beaui  i- 
f ully  draped  form,  and  who  makes  the  study  of 
her  personal  appearance  almost  a  science,  and 
who  lives  well  within  her  means  shall  be  ad- 
mired. Young  women  with  the  rose  bud  of  in- 
nocency  blushing  upon  their  cheeks  and  with 
very  little  experience  in  the  world  are  thrown 
into  the  company  of  men  twice  their  own  aj^e, 
and  the  man  who  deceives  such  holy  simplicity 


1-88 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


and  trust  deserves  the  eternal  damnation  of 
society. 

THE  IDEAL  YOUNG  WOMAN  HAS  AN  AIM  IN  LIFE. 

Every  young  women  should  have  as  definite 
an  aim  in  life  as  a  young  man.  The  silph-'ike 
girl  who  acts  the  part  of  the  butterfly  in  ihe 
sunshine  flitting  fro  ri  place  to  place  cm  n3\^3r 
succeed.  Many  indulge  in  day  dreams  of  some 
time  being  the  lady  of  a  mansion,  or  the  centre 
of  social  influence  as  if  some  exalted  position 
without  preparation  were  their  great  mission  in 
life.  God  has  designed  you  for  some  definite 
calling  in  life  and  it  will  take  the  most  pains- 
taking care  and  self  denial  to  attain  to  yoar 
very  best.  Experience  plays  havoc  with  the 
dreams  of  the  vacant  faced  girl  who  sang  sweet 
lallabys  to  her  heart,  and  thought  if  she  had 
wealth,  and  was  free  from  toil  she  would  be 
happy.  The  great  mission  of  life  is  not  posi- 
tion but  duty. 

"Honour  and  shame  fro  n  no  condition  rise, 
Ant  well  your  part — there  all  the  honour  lie.^j/' 
As  I  look  into  the  bright  constellation  of  il- 
lustrious women  who  have  shone  as  stars  of  the 
first  magnitude,  I  learn  that  they  were  all  in- 
dustrious, self  sacrificing  and  devoted  to  their 
mission  in  life.  Draw  a  circle  in  your  mental 
vision  around  the  bright  galaxy  of  these  shining 
immortals:    Florence  Nightingale,  ''the  angel 


THE   IDEAL  YOUNG  WOMAN  189 


of  the  Crimea,''  and  whose  bosom  Queen  Vic- 
toria jewellei  with  a  ruby-red  enamel  cross  on 
a  white  tield  encircled  by  a  black  band  with 
these  words,  ''Blessed  are  the  mercifal;"  E'iza- 
beth  Fry  the  philaathropist,  baroness  Bai-dett- 
Coutts  the  benefactor,  Alary  A.  Liverm ore  the 
friend  of  the  wounded  boys  in  blue,  Helen 
Hunt  Jackson  whose  last  verse  of  composition 
was, 

''In  outskirts  of  Thy  kingdoms  vast, 
Father,  tlie  humblest  spot  ujive  me; 
Set  me  the  lowliest  task  Thou  hast, 
Let  me  repentant  work  for  Thee.'* 

Harriet  Beecher  Stowe  of  world  wide  fame, 
Susannah  Wesley  who  is  the  mother  of  experi- 
mental reli.tj:ion  robed  in  spiritual  power,  and 
Madame  de  Stael  the  only  woman  that  Napoleon 
Boneparte  ever  feared  On  the  circle  which 
surrouii  ds  this  grand  constellation  read  the  holy 
trinity  wliicli  made  them  immortal — Duty, 
Truth  and  Perseverance.  O,  the  rubies  and 
diamonds  and  amethysts  of  genius,  poetry  and 
philanthropy  that  have  never  come  to  the  lii^ht 
for  want  of  definite  aim  and  unswerving  nde]ity, 
Have  a  great  purpose  in  life  and  tlien  with  all 
the  majesty  of  your  soul  press  on  to  the  goal. 

BE  INDUSTRIOrS. 

The  perspiration  which  b^vlds  tlie  black- 
smith's brow  as  he  wields  the  hammer  not  only 


190 


MAERIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


gives  brawn  to  liis  arm  but  sturdier  matiliood, 
the  heroism  of  the  gen'^ral  in  the  storms  of 
battle,  bearing  the  responsibility  of  a  nation's 
destiny  carves  deeper  the  furrows  in  his  brow 
l^rophetic  of  a  more  rugged  and  mountainous 
character,  the  motives  and  holy  inspirations 
which  throb  in  the  bosom  of  the  young  woman 
who  is  making  a  livelihood  for  an  aged  mother, 
or  for  the  little  oi^e.s  at  home  brings,  her  into 
the  kingdom  of  Jesus  Christ  who  gave  his  life 
for  others.  Tii:]  iistry  is  not  only  a  great  posi- 
tive blessing  but  a  great  preventative  to  evil. 
Bishop  Hall  said,  ''The  industrious  have  no 
leisure  to  sin;  the  idle  have  neither  leisure  nor 
povv^er  to  avoid  sin."  The  Turks  have  a  proverb 
which  reads  ''The  devil  tempts  all  other  men 
but  idle  men  tempi  the  devil."  God's  vessels 
for  measuring  out  to  the  needs  of  his  people 
are  as  immense  as  the  earth.  He  gives  us 
water  by  the  river  and  the  ocean,  he  gives  us 
light  by  the  sun,  he  gives  us  fuel  by  great  for- 
ests and  coal  mines,  he  gives  wheat  and  corn 
by  millions  of  acres,  he  gives  us  meat  by  the 
♦  cattle  on  a  thousand  hills,  he  gives  us  air  by 
aerial  oceans  but  when  he  comes  to  give  us  time 
it  is  only  minute  by  minute,  he  never  gives  us 
two  minutes  at  a  time.  How  important  to  use 
well  the  golden  moments.  I  want  you  to  look 
at  a  poor  but  industrious  girl  wliose  name  has 


THC  IDEAL  YOUNG  WOMAN 


191 


b(^come  a  hoa.sehokl  word — Mary  A.  Livermore. 
Her  parents  were  pnov  and  at  the  age  of  twelve 
her  heart  was  touched  to  gee  her  father  work 
so  hard,  and  she  learned  dress-making  and 
earned  thirty -seven  cents  per  day  to  assist  the^ 
family.  She  next  went  to  a  clothing  establish- 
ment and  made  flannel  shirts  at  six  and  one- 
fourth  cents  each  She  longed  for  an  educa- 
tion and  Dr.  Neale  the  minister  assisted  her  in 
going  to  the  Charlston  Female  Seminary. 
When  Abraham  Lincoln  made  liis  call  for  75,- 
000  men  she  was  in  Boston  and  heard  the  bands 
X)lay  and  saw  tiie  men  move  to  the  front,  and 
after  t:iey  left  s  )me  of  their  wives  fainted  and 
again  her  heart  was  tvjuched.  She  went  to 
Fort  D;)n^^lsoii  an  1  on  to  Vicksburg,  and  was 
m(3st  efficient  in  the  San. itary  and  Christian 
Commission  which  helped  the  battles  of  the 
Uiiion  to  arj  average  of  $7d.00v)  to  comfort  and 
cheer  the  wounded.  She  h-i^  given  an  inspira- 
tion to  girls  to  make  m.ost  of  tliemselves.  The 
girl  w  IS  m  other  to  the  woman  and  her  industry 
and  kindness  for  her  father  broadened  out  until 
it  readied  the  suffering  of  the  Union  ni'my. 
Love  and  industry  and  heroism  were  the  three 
graces  which  lifted  her  out  of' the  common  walks 
of  life  and  enthroned  hex  queen  in  the  hearts 
of  grateful  millions. 


192  MAKRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


THE  IDEAL  YOUNG  WOMAN  IS  INTELLIGENT. 

David  said,  ''That  our  daaghters  may  be  as 
corner  stones  polished  after  the  similitude  of  a 
palace."  The  polished  corner  stones  of  the  pal- 
*aGe  are  both  beautiful  and  useful,  and  thus  it 
should  be  in  the  education  of  a  young  woman. 
It  is  not  merely  for  display,  to  trum  on  the 
piano  and  entertain,  but  to  be  a  great  factor  in 
bearing  up  the  ltt  nid  palace  of  a  christian  civil- 
ization. Our  ])\<y\i  schools  and  colleges  rightly 
call  their  gra  liiiiiag  exercises  Commencement. 
It  is  only  the  beu^inning  of  an  education;  they 
have  opened  the  door  of  knowledge  and  looked 
inside  and  now  they  are  to  enter  the»  temjole  and 
investigate  for  all  the  years  to  come.  I  blush 
for  the  young  man  or  woman  who  says,  "I  fin- 
ished my  education  last  June."  This  is  an  age 
ot  educational  luxuries  in  free  libraries,  and 
magazines,  and  lectures  and  able  educators. 
You  may  be  at  work  from  six  to  ten  hours  per 
day  and  yet  be  well  read  in  the  history  and  lit- 
erature of  the  world.  If  you  read  fifty  pages 
every  night  you  will  read  in  a  single  year  18,- 
250  pages,  or  sixty  books  of  three  hundred  pages 
each.  A  great  reader  not  long  since  said,  "I 
regret  leaving  this  world  with  so  many  books 
not  read."  We  sometimes  think  that  all  the 
great  men  and  women  were  born  great.  "A 
great  man  or  woman  in  letters  without  great 


THE  IDEAL  YOUNG  WOMAN 


193 


scholarship  is  well  nigh  impossible."  We  men- 
tion the  name  of  Harriet  Beecher  Stowe  as  one 
of  America's  most  illustrious  women.  She  in- 
herited much  but  acquired  more.  At  seven 
years  of  age  she  learned  twenty-seven  long 
hymns  and  two  long  chax3ters  in  the  bible.  At 
twelve  she  wrote  an  essay  on,  ''Can  the  Immor- 
tality of  the  Soul  be  proved  by  Nature?"  She 
next  entered  the  school  of  her  sister  Catherine 
and  matur^^d  into  splendid  womanhood  with  a 
strong  and  highly  polished  mind,  and  when  the 
question  of  slavery  began  to  agitate  the  Chris- 
tian people  of  the  country  her  great  heart 
buraed  for  the  oppressed,  and  from  that  burn- 
ing hea»rt  came  Uncle  Tom's  Cabin  which  had 
a  circulation  of  300,000  in  less  than  a  year.  Her 
bor>k  deluged  the  country  with  a  great  tidal 
wave  of  sympathy  for  the  Negro  and  swept  over 
Er.rope  and  thus  she  besieged  the  strongholds 
of  prejudice,  and  stormed  the  forts  of  all  oppo- 
sition by  a  revolution  of  ideas  set  on  fire  with  a 
loving  heart.  This  climax  was  not  reached  by 
a  day  dreamer,  or  a  fortune  waiter  but  by  a 
woman  whose  brain  and  heart  and  hands  were 
full  to  overflcwing  with  duty  and  industry  and 
love.  She  did  not  become  famous  in  a  day,  but 
was  in  training  for  more  than  forty  years,  and 
&od  had  her  ready  around  the  curve  waiting 
when  the  opportune  time  came  to  strike  for  lib- 


194 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


erty  with  the  hammer  of  love  upon  the  rocky 
hearts  of  millions, 

THE  IDEAL  YOUNG  WOMAN  IS  A  CHRISTIAN. 

"The  king's  daughter  is  all  glorious  wiihiii, 
her  clothing  is  of  wrought  gold."  What  are 
the  characteristics  of  a  Christian  lady?  It  is 
not  that  grace  of  form  learned  in  the  ball  room, 
it  is  not  a  code  on  etiquette  to  be  put  on  and  off 
on  set  occasions,  it  is  not  merely  soft  hands  and 
delicate  and  fashionable  apparel.  The  Saxon 
word  lady  used  to  mean  bread  distributer,  but 
it  means  vastly  more.  It  is,'  "benevolence  in 
trifles,"  it  is  amiability  of  disposition,  it  is  free- 
dom from  selfishness  and  vanity,  it  is  all  the 
graces  of  mind  and  heart  ripened  luscious  and 
sweet  under  the  benign  influences  of  the  gos- 
pel. The  difference  in  the  condition  of  women 
in  heathen  lands  and  in  America  is  the  plus  or 
minus  the  Word  of  God.  The  only  perfect 
ideal  for  life  is  the  Christ;  ideal  of  sacrifice, 
ideal  o^  purity,  ideal  of  love,  ideal  of  usefulness, 
ideal  of  long  suffering,  all  the  virtues  and  graces 
of  life  blended  in  the  pure  white  light  and  life 
of  the  Son  of  man. 

THE  REGAL  INFLUENCE  OF  WOMAN. 

I  wish  to  inspire  you  to  nobler  efforts  by  what 
women  have  done  and  what  can  be  done  again. 
She  has  been  the  life  of  the  Sunday  School,  the 
Prayer  Meeting,  the  cause  of  Missions  and  the 


THE  IDEAL  YOUNG  WOMAN 


195 


church  the  world  over.  With  her  pen  she  has 
stirred  the  world.  It  was  Mrs.  Hemans  who 
wrote,  ''I  hear  thee  speak  of  the  better  land;" 
it  was  Mrs.  Thorpe  who  wrote,  ''Curfew  shall 
not  ring  tonight;"  it  was  Eliza  Cook  who  wrote, 
''The  old  Arm-Chair;"  It  was  Mrs,  Wakefield 
who  wrote,  "Over  the  river  they  beckon  to  me;" 
it  was  Mrs.  Allen  who  wrote,  "Rock  me  to 
sleep,  mother,  rock  me  to  sleep,"  and  it  was 
Miss  Julia  Ward  Howe  who  wrote  "The  Battle 
Hymn  of  the  Republic."  It  is  not  long  since 
woman  has  had  equal  priveleges  with  man  in  ed- 
ucation, and  when  one  hundred  years  more  is 
hers  of  splendid  opportunity,  her  pen  and  brain 
and  heart  will  usher  in  a  grander  day.  Conse- 
crated woman  w^ith  her  one  hand  upon  the  cra- 
dle and  the  other  clinging  to  the  cross  of  Christ 
will  embrace  the  world  and  bring  it  as  a  trophy 
to  the  feet  of  our  Immanuel. 


196  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


The  Old  Folks  at  Home. 

I^©Gtiar©  XIX. 

Thou  shall  rise  up  before  the  hoary  head,  and 
honor  the  face  of  the  old  man  and  fear  th}^  God. — 
Moses. 

"The  hoary  head  is  a  crown  of  glory  if  found  in 
the  ways  of  righteousness 

"Honor  th}^  father  and  thy  mother  that  thy  days 
may  be  long  in  the  land  which  the  Lord  thy  God 
giveth  thee/' 

I  have  a  profound  reverence  for  old  people. 
We  celebrate  Children's  day,  and  preach  ser- 
mons to  young  men  and  women  and  it  is  right. 
We  cannot  take  too  much  pains  with  the  young 
who  are  starting  in  life  that  they  may  be  fitted 
and  equipped  for  success.  They  are  the  leaders 
and  reformers,  and  benefactors,  and  heroes,  and 
champions  of  the  cause  of  right  of  tomorrow 
Our  old  people  won  the  mighty  victories  of 
yesterday,  and  have  borne  the  burdens  of  state 
and  church;  they  have  done  more  for  us  than 
we  can  ever  do  in  return,  and  they  have  lovvid 
us  more  tenderly  than  we  have  ever  loved  them 
The  heights  of  their  love  for  us  we  shall  never 
be  able  to  attain  unto,  and  the  depths  of  their 


WILLIAM  TAYLOR,  D. 
Bishop  of  Africa 


THE  OLD  FOLKS  AT  HOME 


197 


sacrifice  we  shall  never  fathom  until  we  become 
parents  and  by  experience  feel  the  yearnintJ^s  of 
a  love  that  is  stront^er  than  death.  It  is  fitting 
today  that  we  visit  the  old  folks  at  home  and 
spend  an  hour  in  appreciation  of  their  services 
to  us  and  our  love  for  them . 

HOW  THEY  HAVE  BLESSED  US 

They  have  credited  and  deeded  over  to  us  a 
new  earth.  They  have  willed  us  a  new  world 
of  invention,  of  civilization.  They  came  to 
thess  great  prairies  with  horses  and  mules  and 
heavy  wagons  to  carve  out  for  us  a  land  as  rich 
as  the  valley  of  the  Nile.  They  not  only  gave 
their  labors,  but  their  sons  and  lives  they  laid 
upon  the  altars  of  our  country  and  redeemed  it 
from  the  curse  of  slavery.  They  have  seen  an 
old  world  buried,  and  a  new  w^orld  created 
They  stood  by  the  grave  of  the  flint  locks  and 
candles,  and  old  press  and  mill,  and  hand  rake 
and  flail  and  sickle  and  cradle  and  scythe  and 
saw  them  all  buried  beyond  the  possibility  of  a 
resurrection.  Says  an  old  man  I  am  contemp- 
orary with  the  railroad,  the  telegraph,  the  steam- 
ship, the  photograph,  the  sewing  and  knitting 
machine,  the  steam  plow  and  cook  stove,  the 
mower  and  reaper,  the  harvester,  the  cylinder 
press,  the  match,  gaslight,  electric  light,  lamp 
light,  telephone,  the  gattling  gun,  ocean  steam 
er,  and  canned  fruit.    This  is  a  new  world,  a 


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MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


new  creation.  Turn  baek  the  hand  of  the  cl©ck 
of  time  for  one  hundred  years  and  make  the 
mighty  contrast  between  two  worlds,  the  old 
and  the  new  and  then  can  we  comprehend  in 
part  the  great  blessings  that  liave  been  willed 
to  us  by  our  ancestors.  We  think  we  would 
like  to  talk  with  Daniel  about  the  lion's  den, 
and  Moses  about  the  Red  Sea  but  we  have 
greater  priveleges.  We  can  talk  with  men  to- 
day who  have  tamed  the  lions  without  an  angel's 
help.  We  have  thought  wonderful  that  Q-od 
should  make  the  waters  of  the  Red  8ea  stand 
up  as  heaps,  but  today  man  can  make  W  iter 
run  up  hill  and  our  vessels  climb  the  docks  lik© 
a  flight  of  stairs.  There  is  as  much  water  runs 
up  hill  as  down.  The  Sun  is  God's  great  en- 
gine to  lift  millions  of  tons  of  water  over  the 
Rockies  and  AUeghanies  and  let  them  fall  in 
misting  spray  ov  gentle  shower  upon  our  great 
reaches  of  territory.  Our  fathers  and  mothers 
have  sacrificed  for  us  and  we  owe  them  tons  of 
gratitude. 

HOW  SHOULD  WE  TREAT  THEM. 

As  the  eye  grows  dim  and  the  ear  heavy  and 
the  step  feeble,  and  often  the  partner  gone  on 
before  we  should  be  all  the  more  attentive. 
"Honor  thy  father  and  thy  mother"  Qod  says. 
There  is  no  time  specified  when  we  shall  cease 
to  honor  them  but  as  long  as  they  live.  The 


THE  OLD  FOLKS  AT  HOME 


199 


son  and  daughter  of  fifty  are  to  honor  their 
parents  as  much  as  when  they  were  fifteen 
There  are  no  conditions  given  under  which  we 
are  to  cease  to  respect  our  parents.  If  they  do 
things  that  are  wrong  still  it  is  our  duty  and 
God's  eternal  command  to  honor  them.  I  can- 
not respect  a  young  man  who  talks  badly  about 
his  parents.  We  are  to  honor  them  with  our 
love,  and  true  love  will  show  itself  in  a  thous- 
and little  deeds  of  kindness.  There  is  much 
pur©  religion  in  coming  home  and  relating  the 
news  of  the  day  to  the  aged  ones,  I  have  seen 
homes  where  the  grand  parents  w^ere  crowded 
to  the  garrets  to  make  room  for  the  grand- 
children. There  is  no  place  at  table  or  room 
in  the  house  too  good  for  the  old  people,  and 
they  ought  to  be  thought  of  first.  Let  me  give 
you  two  or  three  pictures  tkat  are  worthy  a 
place  in  every  home.  Millard  Fillmore's  father 
was  a  farmer,  and  Millard  was  president  of 
these  United  States.  Some  children  are 
asham  ed  of  their  parents,  the  way  they  dress 
and  the  language  they  use,  and  they  apologise 
for  them  to  strangers.  The  President's  father 
lived  in  an  old  farmhouse  and  was  very  plain 
and  eighty  years  of  ae:e  when  his  son  was  presi- 
dent. He  went  to  the  Capital  to  visit  at  the 
White  House.  His  son  gave  him  a  royal  re- 
ception and  treated  him  as  a  prince   and  the 


200  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


octogenarian  loved  to  sit  up  until  midnight  and 
tell  how  his  son  received  hini.    There    was  a 
majesty  and  a  royalty  about  that  son   in  the 
treatment  of  his  father  that  ought  to  be  en- 
graved on  the  hearts  of  all  young  men.    I  read 
a  little  sermon  the  other  day   about   a  forlorn 
and  palsied  old  woman  who  went   to   a  little 
smoky,  filthy  depot  to  sell  some  trinkets  to  get 
her  bread  to  eat.    It  was  a  cold  and  snowy  day 
and  life's  plainest  necessities   drove    this  old 
woman  out  into  the  storm  to  earn  a  few  pennies. 
She  was  almost  blind  and  when  she  entered  the 
depot  she  could  not  find  the  radiators.    A  lady 
was  lying  half  asleep  on  a  sofa  when  she  opened 
her  eyes  and  led  the  old  blind  woman  to  the  ra- 
diators, and  got  her  a  chair  to  sit  down  on. 
She  spread  out  her  ragged  and  wet  mittens  to 
dry  when  the  lady  asked  her  if  she  would  not 
like  a  cup  of  tea?    '^Sakes  alive:  do  they  keep 
tea  to  this  depot?"  cried  the   old   lady.  She 
took  the  tea  saying  as  she  -sipped  it  with  a  rel- 
ish,   'Hhis  does  warm  my   heart,"    Then  this 
good  lady  bought  some  of  her  plain  wares  and 
left.    There  is  but  little  to    draw   you    to  a 
ragged  beggar  woman,  but  that  little   act  of 
charity  was  so  simple  and  Christlike  that  I  am 
sure  around  the  throne  of  God  was  heard  once 
more    "Inasmuch  as  ye  have  done  it  unto  one 
of  the  least  of  these,  my  brethren,  ye  have  done 


THE  OLD  FOLKS  AT  HOME 


201 


it  unto  me."  There  is  a  picture  in  the  Old 
Testament  about  an  old  father  and  his  boy  that 
^oes  CO  my  very  heart,  You  remember  when 
Joseph  became  prime  minister  of  Egypt  and 
his  father  was  in  poverty  at  home.  Joseph  was 
surrounded  by  royalty  and  was  next  to  Pharoah 
upon  his  throne,  and  yet  he  made  no  excuses 
about  his  father.  Some  would  have  said  I  can- 
not have  my  father  come  here,  I  will  send  him 
plenty  to  live  on  at  home,  or  if  he  comes  I  will 
meet  him  and  care  for  him  in  some  country 
home.  Yes  there  are  many  funerals  we  attend 
of  old  people  where  the  black  crape  hanging  on 
the  door  gives  the  lie  to  the  within  for  there  is 
really  gladness  when  the  old  person  is  gone. 
Ja3ob  had  no  property  to  will  and  he  was  just 
a  plain  farmer  with  long  beard  and  not  accus- 
tomed to  royalty.  He  would  very  likely  shock 
many  of  the  aristocracy  at  court.  Jacob  went 
down  to  Egypt  in  a  plain  wagon  and  Joseph 
with  a  son's  affection  went  out  to  meet  him  and 
jumped  out  of  his  chariot  and  climbed  into  the 
old  wagon  and  fell  on  his  father's  neck  and 
kissed  him,  and  led  the  way  with  a  military  es- 
cort and  introduced  him  to  Pharoah's  courtiers, 
and  to  the  king,  and  was  the  happiest  man  in 
all  Egypt.  That  is  the  way  to  treat  father  and 
mother.  Go  and  see  your  parents  when  you 
can,  and  write  them  often  and  God  say^  'Hhy 


202 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


days  shall  be  long  in  the  land." 

HOW  TO  MAKE  OLD  AGE  HAPPY. 

Old  age  is  a  judgement  day.  Tf  the  past  has 
been  squandered  thoughts  like  these  will  hautit 
us,  "Oh  what  I  might  have  been."  Don't  retire 
from  all  work  too  soon.  A  garden  patch  or 
some  easy  toil  fills  many  an  hour  with  heart 
ease.  It  is  in  your  memory  that  King  William 
of  Prusaia  conquered  France  at  the  age  of  73 
Lord  Beaconsfield  began  to  disturb  the  world 
at  seventy,  and  William  Gladstone  i^  still 
mighty  with  pen  and  in  counsel.  McCauley 
was  forty-eight  when  he  issued  his  first  and 
second  volumes  of  his  history  of  England. 
Peter  Cooper  said  when  he  was  ninety-three  he 
expected  to  do  his  best  work  yet.  and  he 
established  a  training  school  for  artizans  in 
mechanical  trades  for  all  nationalities.  Many 
aged  people  shorten  their  days  because  they 
forget  that  they  are  old  and  cannot  regain  their 
strength  as  rapidly  as  in  youth.  The  religion 
of  Jesus  Christ  does  more  for  old  age  than  all 
other  sources  combined.  What  inspiring  hopes 
of  heaven,  and  loved  ones  thrill  and  fire  the 
heart  as  the  earthen  vase  grows  thin.  Paul  was 
happy  and  triumphant  when  he  could  reach 
death  with  his  hand.  Hear  him  give  his  won- 
derful testimony  in  old  age,  ''I  have  fought  a 
:^'ood  fight,  I  have  kept   the   faith  henceforth 


THE  OLD  FOLKS  AT  HOME 


203 


there  is  laid  up  for  me  a  crown  of  righteousness 
which  the  Lord,  the  righteous  jud<^e  shall  give 
me  at  that  day."  How  God  lets  down  to  his 
agad  servants  the  chariot  of  his  promises.  "Be- 
loved, now  are  we  the  sons  of  God  and  it  doth 
not  yet  appear  what  we  shall  be,  but  this  we 
know  that  when  he  shall  appear  we  shall  be  like 
him  for  we  shall  see  him  as  he  is."  "Yea  though 
I  walk  throug:h  the  valley  of  the  shadow  of  death 
I  will  fear  no  evil  for  thou  art  with  me,  thy  rod 
and  thy  stalf  they  comfort  me."  No  book  speaks 
so  grandly  of  God's  aged  saints  as  the  Bible. 
No  earthly  crown  can  compare  with  the  silver 
locks  of  old  age  if  found  pure  and  right.  The 
crown  of  Ivan  contains  841  diamonds,  the  crown 
of  Peter  887  diamonds,  the  crown  of  England 
1703,  the  imperial  crown  of  Russia  3500,  and 
the  crown  of  France  5,352  diamonds,  but  all 
these  cannot  compare  with  the  crown  of  glory, 
the  crown  of  life,  the  crown  of  rejoicing.  We 
cannot  measure  our  age  by  years  alone.  Some 
live  more  in  ten  years  than  others  do  in  twenty. 

"He  liveth  long  who  liveth  well; 
All  other  life  is  short  and  vain  ; 
He  liveth  longest  who  can  tell 
Of  living  most  for  heavenly  gain. 

Be  what  thou  seemesc ;  live  thy  creed  ; 
Hold  up  to  earth  the  torch  divine; 
Be  what  thou  prayest  to  be  made 
Let  the  great  Master's  steps  be  thine.'* 


204 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


There  are  two  sides  to  old  age.  It  is  rather 
solemn  to  feel  that  life  is  terminating,  and  gilt- 
edge  it  as  we  may  yet  it  is  a  great  solemn  fact. 
Grey  hairs,  feeble  steps,  deep  cut  lines  in  time 
worn  faces,  trembling  hands  are  all  true  proph- 
ets. Most  of  this  life  is  gone,  at  best  but  a  frag- 
ment of  it  remains.  The  sands  in  the  hour 
glass  are  nearly  run  out,  and  this  looks  sad  to 
the  man  who  has  all  behind  him  and  nothing 
before.  There  is  another  side  to  old  age  and  it 
is  a  bright  one.  Lord  Palmnrston  when  asked 
how  old  he  was  replied,  '^on  the  bright  side  of 
seventy,"  for  he  was  over  seventy.  The  pains 
and  adversities  and  persecutions  nearly  all 
passed  and  the  glorious  all  before.  Like  Victor 
Hugo  you  may  say,  '^Winter  is  on  my  head^ 
but  eternal  Spring  is  in  my  heart.'"'  On  the 
dark  side  of  seventy  you  have  seen  your  fairest 
blossoms  fade  away,  you  have  stood  mere  than 
once  by  the  open  grave  of  your  loved  ones,  but 
now  most  of  your  acquaintances  have  preceeded 
you  and  there  await  you.  Who  can  weigh  the 
glory  that  awaits  you.  You  will  never  see  your 
mansion  through  glasses,  or  listen  to  the  music 
of  the  skies  through  dull  ears,  or  walk  the  gol- 
den streets  with  staff  in  hand.  These  are  sup- 
ports to  a  feeble  body,  but  God  will  give  every- 
one of  his  people  a  glorious  body.  Redemp- 
tion will  never  be  complete  until  the  body  is 


THE  OLD  F0LK8  AT  HOME 


205 


raised  an  incorruptible  body.  The  soul  never 
grows  old  but  move  and  more  vigorous 
unto  the  perfect  day.  I  congratulate  you 
today  on  your  prospects  in  nearing 
home  on  your  success  in  overcoming 
the  storms  of  life  thus  far,  on  your  glorious 
f<iith  and  hope  in  Jesus  Christ,  on  the  grand 
inheritance  which  awaits  you,  and  on  the  great 
company  which  shall  welcome  you  to  the  new 
home,  and  I  shall  not  be  at  all  surprised  if  your 
first  utterance  would  be.  ''The  half  has  not  been 
told."  Fathers  and  mothers  in  Israel  wdio  have 
maintained  the  faith,  to  you  I  dedicate  this  ad- 
dress today,  to  your  peace  and  hope  and  com- 
fort. May  the  eternal  One  give  you  all  a  glori- 
ous sunset,  a  safe  anchorage,  and  an  abundant 
entrance  into  his  kingdom  is  my  prayer. 


206  MAKRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


Degrees  in  Heaven. 

I^^etur©  XX. 

In  my  fathar's  house  are  many  mansions,  if  it 
were  not  so  1  would  hav»j  told  you,  I  go  to  prepare 
a  place  for  you. — Jesus. 

If  loftier  posts  superior  state  declare ; 

More  virtuous  acts  if  ampler  meeds  requite; 

If  brightest  crowns  on  noblest  prowess  light, 

And  well-sown  fields  a  fuller  harvest  bear; 

If  thrones, dominions, princedoms, powers  there  are 

Which  God's  inferior  hosts  excel  in  might, 

If  day's  bright  orb  outshine  the  lamp  of  night, 

And  Hesper's  radiance  the  remotest  star: 

Then  shall  the  younger  brethern  of  the  sky, 

If  right  I  scan  the  records  of  their  fate. 

In  varied  ranks  of  social  harmony 

God's  mount  encircle.    Glorious  is  the  state 

E'en  of  the  lowest  there:  but  seats  moie  nigh 

The  Sovereign's  throne  His  greater  st;rvants  wait. 

— Bishop  Mant. 

We  all  desire  to  know  something  of  the  coun- 
try where  we  are  going  to  live.  People  who 
are  going  to  make  California,  or  Florida  their 
home  are  much  interested  in  these  states.  They 
talk  about  them  and  read  about  them  and  in- 
quire about  their  climate,  soil,  fruit  an  d  fe  ilility 


DEGKEES  IN  HEAVEN 


207 


So  we  desire  to  leani  something  today  of  the 
variety,  wealth  and  grandeur  of  heaven.  It  is 
our  final  and  abiding  home,  and  there  we  have 
all  some  precious  treasures,  and  to  that  home 
we  will  take  all  that  is  imperishable  and  valua-  . 
ble.  I  am  greatly  interested  in  heaven.  The 
Saviour's  description  of  heaven  in  the  fourteen- 
th chapter  of  John's  gospel  has  comforted  the 
sorrowing  millions  in  all  ages.  We  cannot  get 
lost,  we  will  have  a  good  travelling  companion, 
one  who  has  been  over  the  road  before,  and  he 
says,  "I  will  come  again  and  receive  you  to  my- 
self. '^When  we  reach  the  end  of  life's  journey 
we  will  have  a  mansion  prepared  by  the  Son  of 
God  especially  to  our  individual  tastes,  comfort 
and  joy.  May  the  Holy  Spirit  help  us  today  in 
c  mforting  your  hearts  with  the  prospect  of  the 
mansions  of  God. 

THERE   WILL    BE    DEGREES    IN    HEAVEN— MANY 
MANSIONS. 

In  the  ancient  world  many  believed  that  they 
would  follow  in  the  fuiure  life  the  employment 
they  had  been  accustomed  to  here.  We  are 
graded  in  our  emijloyment  and  hapijiness  every 
where  in  this  life.  The  flowers  differ  in  fra- 
grance and  in  bloom,  the  birds  in  plumage? 
grace  and  song,  the  rivers  in  color,  grace  and 
majesty;  the  landscape  in  foliage,  mountain  peak 
and  fertile  valley,  the  stars  differ,  the  seas  dif- 


208 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


fer;  we  have  no  monotony  on  earth  and  why 
should  we  have  in  heaven,  idere  each  one  has 
his  own  peculiar  gift  and  taste.  Souie  serve 
the  Lord  with  eloquent  tongue,  some  with  facile 
pen,  others  with  wealth  and  others  by  patience 
on  a  sick  bed.  In  the  church  and  state  some 
have  two  talents  and  others  five  and  ten.  Grod 
has  made  some  apostles,  some  paators,  some 
teachers  and  others  evangelists.  He  has  allot- 
ed  to  men  various  capacities,  tastes  and  powers, 
and  in  heaven  we  must  believe  that  there  will 
be  even  greater  variety.  Every  taste  will  be 
consulted,  and  every  one  assigned  his  lot  ac- 
cording to  his  ability  and  fitness.  The  founda- 
tions of  the  city  are  garnished  with  all  manner 
of  precious  stones,  jasper,  sapphire,  beryl,  to- 
paz, chrysoprasus,  jacinth  and  amethyst,  greater 
than  the  foundations  of  any  earthly  city.  We 
must  not  be  too  literal  in  our  description  of 
heaven,  and  yet  there  is  no  other  way  to  convey 
to  mortal  minds  the  grandeur  of  heaven  but  by 
comparison  with  something  that  we  know  about. 
We  believe  in  the  fatherhood  of  God  and  the 
brotherhood  of  man,  and  that  we  are  all  heirs 
to  sunlight,  puie  air  and  many  great  blessings, 
and  yet  we  differ. 

WE  DIFFER  HERE. 

Our  farms  differ,  our  houses  from  the  wig- 
wam of  the  Indian  to  the  palatial  mansion.  We 


DEGREES  IN  HEAVEN 


209 


differ  in  health  from  the  poor  invalid  to  the 
milliouMire  of  body,  from  the  pale  consumptive 
to  Viw  iiiRii  with  rosy  cheek,  and  arm  of  brawn 
and  who  ca/i  shoulder  a  quarter  of  a  ton.  We 
differ  intellectually  from  the  man  with  inactive 
brain  to  the  man  who  moves  the  world  by  steam, 
and  weighs  God's  great  planets  on  the  scales 
and  measures  them  with  tape.  We  scorn  the 
words  aristocracy  and  upper  crust  but  we  are 
graded  nevertheless.  In  some  of  the  older 
countries  parents  think  more  of  -a  good  pedi- 
gree in  the  young  man  the  daughter  is  going  to 
marry  than  a  splendid  man  without  a  pedigree. 
Here  we  respect  the  man  first,  and  every  one 
stands  or  falls  on  his  own  merit  or  demerit. 
The  Oldest  son  does  not  get  all  the  property, 
nor  is  any  man  born  a  king  unless  he  has  the 
king  in  him  and  has  shown  it  to  the  world. 
The  rail-splitier  can  become  the  nation's  presi- 
dent if  he  has  th*^  president  in  him.  This  is 
God-like  who  exalts  John  Bunyan  to  a  crown, 
and  John  B.  Gougli  the  drui^kard  to  be  "a  priest 
unto  God  forever."  We  differ  not  only  socially 
but  morally  from  the  man  whose  conscience  is 
seared  with  a  hot  iron  to  the  man  who  is  inca- 
pable of  doing  a  mean  thing,  who  has  no  price 
on  his  principles,  and  whom  God  can  trust  to 
the  ends  of  the  earth .  In  heaven  we  will  not 
differ  in  health  for  "the  inhabitants  never  say 


210  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


they  are  sick,''  and  in  many  other  respects  we 
will  not  differ,  but  still  our  talents  and  pursuits 
and  tastes  will  differ.  The  lily  will  never  be- 
come the  rose  "nor  the  violet  the  pansy,  but 
each  will  be  fairer  and  more  beautiful  after  its 
kind."  ''A  topaz  or  a  sapphire  of  earth  if  taken 
to  build  the  New  Jerusalem  does  not  beoom-j 
an  emerald  or  an  amethyst,  but  remnins  a  topaz 
or  sapphire  still.  And  translated  from  the  tar- 
nish of  time  it  is  easy  to  understand  how  each 
glorified  nature  will  attain  in  a  higher  sphere 
its  original  fitness,  and  inherent  affinities,  and 
how  for  the  many  mansiotis  there  will  not  only 
be  many  occupants,  but  every  occupant  may 
have  its  own  office  even  there.  It  is  easy 
to  imagine  that  Isaac  still  will  meditate,  and 
that  the  sweet  singer  of  Israel  will  neither  be  at 
a  loss  for  a  golden  harp,  nor  g:ood  matter  in  a 
song.  It  is  easy  to  imagine  that  Paul  will  find 
an  outlet  for  his  eloquence,  and  Peter  for  his 
energy;  but  it  is  not  easy  to  conceive  how  John 
the  diviae  can  be  the  same  as  Matthew  and 
Phillip,  or  Martha  the  busy  housekeeper  the 
same  as  Mary  the  adoring  listener.  To  evei  y 
precious  stone  there  remains  its  several  tints; 
to  every  star  its  own  glory,  to  every  denizen  of 
the  church  above  his  own  offic  e,  and  to  every 
member  of  the  heavenly  his  own  mansion. — 
Hamilton. 


DEGREES  IN  HEAVEN  211 

If  we  sow  largely  we  shall  reap  largely,  if  we 
build  of  precious  stone,  silver  and  gold  we  shall 
have  a  mansion  of  the  same  quality.  Paul 
says  in  speaking  of  the  resurrection  that  all 
flesh  is  not  the  same.  There  is  flesh  of  man, 
of  beasts,  of  birds  and  of  flshes.  They  all  differ 
yet  each  body  is  fitted  to  its  own  place.  He 
who  knows  all  about  your  tastes,  and  whether 
you  love  music  or  flowers  or  poetry  will  so  har- 
monize your  heavenly  mansion  to  your  redeemed 
taste  that  you  will  love  your  own  mansion  bet- 
ter than  any  other.  "We  shall  differ  from  each 
other  as  the  stars  of  the  firmament  that  shineth 
forever  and  ever." 

HEAVEN  WILL  BE  A  RICH   PLACE — A    PLACE  OF 
GRANDEUR. 

God  has  built  up  his  visible  throne  in  heaven. 
This  earth  is  his  footstool.  This  earth  is  very 
beautiful  carpeted  with  carnations,  waxlike 
lillies  and  the  peerless  pansy.  She  is  rich  in 
rivers  from  the  Niagara,  one  of  the  wonders  of 
the  world,  to  the  St,  Lawrence,  winding  its  way 
through  a  thousand  little  continents  and  the 
silver  streamlet  lost  in  prairie  or  meadow  bloom. 
The  skies  are  set  in  gems  of  unspeakable  gran- 
deur, curtained  with  azure  blue  and  fraught 
with  glittering  diamonds  by  night,  and  robed  by 
day  with  the  meridian  splendor  of  the  sun. 
Poets  have  described  it  m  song,   and  harpers 


212 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


bave  harped  it  on  llieir  harps,  and  yet  it  is  only 
God's  footstool.  His  palace  is  in  heaven.  We 
speak  fio-uratively.  We  are  on  the  footstool 
and  are  j.a)ing  to  the  palace  of  the  King.  How 
brilliant  his  burning  throne,  how  glorious  the 
wing  of  s'Taph .  John  was  a  pri  vileged  man, 
and  saw  heaven  from  the  isle  of  Patmos.  He 
says  the  streets  are  of  gold,  the  walls  are  of  jas- 
per and  the  river  of  life  flows  from  underneath 
the  throne  of  God.  He  described  the  city  as 
1500  miles  long,  and  1500  miles  wide  and  1500 
miles  high  and  all  the  walls  are  jewels.  You 
cannot  see  heaven  in  a  day.  The  gates  are 
X)earls,  the  flowers  never  fade  and  its  rivers  glit- 
ter like  crystals  " 

''Oh  Ihe  transporting  ra[)turons  scenes, 
Tlia:  rises  lo  my  sight. 
Sweet  fields  'arrayed  in  living  green, 
And  rivers  of  delight.'' 

Paul  speaks  of  the  unseau^hable  riclies  of 
God,  and  of  the  far  more  exceeding  weights  of 
gloiy.  Who  can  understand  the  meaning  of 
such  language,  ^'glory,'*  "weights  of  glory,'' 
''eternal  weights  of  glory.''  All  comparison  is 
a  failure.  These  material  figures  are  but  sym- 
bols of  the  social,  and  intellectual  and  moral 
grandeur  of  heaven.  Look  up  and  claim  by 
faith  this  vast  inheritance.  What  matters  it 
about  our  poor  houses,  and  hard  times,  and  light 


DEGREES  IN  HEAVEN 


213 


afflictions  here;  the  men  and  women  who  pray 
and  live  the  principles  of  the  gospel  don't  retire 
on  a  section  of  land,  or  a  few  thousands  in  the 
bank;  but  on  a  good  character,  and  a  precious 
hope,  and  ''the  exceeding  promises  of  God." 
They  are  God's  millionaires  here  and  will  be  in 
heaven. 

*'A  tent  (;r  a  cottage  why  slioiild  I  care. 
They're  building  a  palace  for  me  over  chere, 
An  exile  from  home  yet  still  may  I  sing 
All  glory  to  God  I'm  the  child  of  a  king.** 

THERE  WILL  BE  A  GREAT  MANY  PEOPLE  IN  HEAVEN 

John  said,  ''I  he?rd  the  voice  of  many  angels 
round  about  the  throne,  and  the  number  of  them 
was  ten  thousand  times  ten  thousand,  and 
thousands  of  thousands,  and  lo  I  beheld  a  great 
number  which  no  man  could  number  of  all  na- 
tions and  kindreds  and  peoples  and  tongues." 
No  man  can  take  tlip  census  of  heaven  it  is  toe 
great.  The  longer  I  preach  the  gospel,  the  more 
I  understand  the  bible,  the  more  people  I  see  in 
heaven.  ^  11  the  children  will  be  there  and  I  re- 
joice in  tlie  d.^y  when  infant  damnation  has  been 
preached  out  of  the  universe  of  God,  All  the 
heathen  will  l)e  there  who  have  lived  up  to  the 
best  light  they  have,  and  all  nationalities  and 
churches,  and  legions  untold  outside  of  all  the 
churches.  God  is  going  to  save  this  world  un- 
til '^righteousness  shall  cover  the  earth  as  th© 


214 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


waters  cover  the  great  deep."  One  writer  says 
if  heaven  be  a  cube  of  1500  miles,  and  we  leave 
one-half  of  it  for  the  throne  of  Grod,  and  the 
court  of  heaven,  and  one-fourth  of  it  for  streets, 
and  divide  the  remaining  fourth  into  rooms  19 
feet  square  and  16  high  that  we  will  have  five 
trillions,  seven  hundred  and  forty-three  mill- 
ions, seven  hundred  and  fifty-nine  thousands 
of  rooms.  Suppose  the  world  will  always  con- 
tain 909,000,090  of  a  population,  and  a  genera- 
tion lasts  thirty-three  years  and  that  the  world 
lasts  100,000  years.  Then  suppose  there  were 
11,230  worlds  equal  to  this  earth  there  would 
be  a  room  16  feet  long  by  17  wide  and  15  high 
for  every  person  in  the  11,230  worlds,  and  yet 
there  would  be  room.  There  will  not  be  a  va- 
cant mansion  in  heaven,  or  an  unworn  crown 
"In  my  father's  house  are  many  man- 
sions." If  God  spared  not  his  only  begotten 
Son  to  give  us  eternal  life  he  will  spare  no  pains 
to  make  heaven  delightful  for  us.  If  you  have 
afflictions,  and  persecution*,  and  poverty  to  con- 
tend with  it  is  better  higher  up.  If  you  feel 
that  a  part  of  you  lies  buried  in  the  cemetery 
in  a  lovely  child  or  companion  it  will  not  always 
be  so,  for  he  "shall  fashion  these  vile  bodies 
like  unto  his  own  glorious  body."  Many  aged 
and  afflicted  ones,  voice  their  faith  by  saying: 


DEGREES  IN  HEAVEN 


215 


**Let  me  go  where  none  are  weary — 

Where  is  raised  no  wail  of  woe  ; 

liet  me  go  and  l)athe  tuy  spirit 

In  the  raptures  angels  know. 

Let  me  go  for  bliss  eternal 

Lures  my  soul  away,  away, 

And  the  victor's  song  triumphant 

Thrills  my  heart;  I  cannot  stay. 

Let  me  go ;  why  should  I  tarry? 
What  has  earth  to  bind  me  here? 
What  but  cares  and  toiL^  and  sorrows? 
What  but  death  and  pain  and  fear? 
Let  me  go  for  hopes  most  cherished, 
Blasted  round  me  often  lie. 

I've  gathered  brightest  flowers, 
But  to  see  them  fade  and  die.*' 

Amidst  the  conflicts  of  life  listen  to  the  sweet 
music  of  the  skies,  look  at  the  bending,  beckon- 
ing forms  of  loved  ones,  have  faith  in  the  one 
who  said,  "In  my  Father's  house  are  many 
mansions'',  and  eteraally  resolve  God  helping 
you  to  enter  the  haven  of  rest.  Amen. 


216 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOMB 


Our  Heavenly  Home. 


I^©(3tur@  XXI. 

In  my  Father's  house  are  many  mansions:  if  it 
were  not  so,  I  would  have  told  you.  I  go  to  pre- 
pare a  place  for  you. — Jesus. 

In  thy  presence  is  fulness  of  joy  ;  at  thy  right 
hand  there  are  pleasures  forevermore. — David. 

To  an  inheritance  incorruptible  and  nndefiled 
and  that  fadeth  not  away,  reserved  in  heaven  tor 
you. — Peter. 

Beloved,  now  are  we  the  sons  ot  God,  and  it 
doth  not  yet  appear  what  we  shall  he:  but  we  know 
that,  when  he  shall  appear,  we  shall  be  like  him  ; 
for  we  shall  see  him  as  he  is.  And  the  city  had 
no  need  of  the  sun,  neither  of  the  moon,  to  shine 
in  it:  for  the  glory  of  God  did  lighten  it,  and  the 
Lamb  is  the  light  thereof. 

And  God  shall  wipe  away  all  tears  from  their 
eyes:  and  there  shall  be  no  more  death,  neither 
sorrow  nor  crying,  neither  shall  there  be  any  more 
pain. 

And  the  gates  of  it  shall  not  be  shut  at  all  by 
day:  for  there  shall  l»e  no  night  there. 


OUR  HEAVENLY  HOME 


217 


Therefore  are  they  before  the  throne  of  God 
and  srrve  hi  u  day  and  night  in  Ins  temple:  and  he 
t()iit  >iti(  th  on  t  he  throne  shaii  dwell  among  them. 
Th^rM  hhali  hunger  no  ni'^re,  neither  thirst  any 
HKn.-;  neither  shall  the  sun  light  on  them  nor  any 
heat 

Knr  th(^  LamI)  whieh  is  in  the  midst  of  the  throne 
sh;dl  feed  them,  and  slall  leaci  them  unto  living 
foiintains  of  water:  and  (^od  shall  wipe  away  all 
trar'^  from  their  eyes. —  John. 

T  have  read  to  you  the  most  wonderful  prom- 
ises about  heaven  lhat  ever  Have  been  recorded. 
The  bible  is  tlie  on^y  book  which  Liives  us  a 
glimpse  of  our  heavenly  home.  We  cannot  at- 
tfrin  unto  the  ^n'Htuieur  of  heaven  by  reason,  it 
is  b  eyond  the  read]  of  tlje  rugged  and  immortal 
m;srl  to  p  irt  I 'i  ^  v^il  w'n  -li  hides  from  us  the 
gi'»ry  of  our  eternal  home.  I  have  read  to  you 
wlud  Jesus  siys  about  it,  and  quoted  extensive- 
ly from  John  wiio  saw  more  of  heaven  than  any 
r^  ;:^  (•  nuar.  He  was  pei'm^'tted  to  look  in,  and 
I  <■  !  f  s  en  us  a  dcFcription  o^  it  that  charms 
a  1(1  inspii-es  every  chili!  of  hope.  We  know 
mnr^li  of  (HI;- earthly  homes;  they  are  rich  in  sa- 
cred men  (  i  (  s.  We  Inive  seen  ihtni  rainbowed 
with  bnds  of  rarest  promise,  we  have  basked  in 
tlieir  holy  (ielights  in  the  noonday  splendor  of 
their  ^Ir.ry.  and  we  have  wept  in  their  shadows, 
and  beneath  the  weeping  willows  sat  alone  in 


218 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


the  midnight  of  sorrow  and  hearrache.  There 
is  no  comparison  between  the  old  and  new 
home,  the  earthly  and  the  heavenly.  We  are 
all  moving  today  from  home  to  home  and  it  is 
fitting  that  we  should  sing  and  talk  about  tlie 
home  we  are  going  to 

OUR  HOPES  OF  HEAVEN  HAVE  LIFTED  FROM  OUR 
BACKS  life's  heaviest  BURDENS  AND  TURNED 
THE  DARKEST  NIGHT  INTO  BRIGHTEST  DAY. 

Our  hopes  of  heaven  have  cheered  our  droop- 
ing spirits  m  the  grinding  struggles  for  a  live- 
lihood, when  poverty  pressed  sorely  upon  us,  as 
w@  thought  of  the  time  when  all  would  be  the 
millionaires  of  glory  and  the  poorest  would 
trample  beneath  his  feet  the  gold  which  the 
richest  of  earth  ccvet.  When  the  tiny  hands 
were  folded  on  the  bosom  of  our  darling,  and 
the  rosewood  coffin  was  covered  over  with  earth, 
and  our  hearts  were  broken,  we  remembered 
that  he  said,  ^'suffer  the  little  ones  to  come  unto 
me,"  and  that  with  David  we  should  go  to  them 
some  day,  and  our  precious  faith  that  the  little 
ones  only  passed  from  mother's  arms  up  to  the 
amis  of  God  was  such  a  benediction  to  us  that 
our  hearts  were  not  half  so  sore.  When  your 
motives  were  wrongly  interpreted,  and  you  were 
innocently  persecuted,  and  defrauded  out  of 
your  home  the  thoughts  that  some  day  "we 
shall  know  as  we  are  known,"  and  "all  things 


OUR  HEAVENLY  HOME 


219 


work  together  for  good  to  those  who  love  God 
solaced  your  hearts  with  most  blessed  hopes, 
and  when  old  age  environs  us  and  the  earthly 
home  is  fading  how  delightful  to  think  that 
(io.i  will  send  an  escoit  for  us,  and  it  may  be 
our  dearest  friends  and  we  shall  enter  ''the 
house  not  made  with  hands,  eternal  in  th© 
heavens."  These  purifying,  uplifting  thoughts 
of  lieaven  have  taken  the  sting  out  of  all  the 
sorrows  of  earth. 

*'Con)e  ye  disconsolate,  where'er  ye  langnish, 
Come,  to  the  mercy-seat  fervently  kneel; 
liere  Inin^'  your  woiuuled  hearts,  here  tell  your 
anguish. 

Karth  has  no  sorrow  tliat  heaven  cannot  heal. 

Joy  to  the  comfortU^ss,  liuhf.  to  the  stra\ing, 
iione,  vvhrn  all  others  die  fadeless  and  pure; 
Here  speaks  the  Comforter  in  merely  saying, 
Karth  has  no  sorrow  that  heaven  cannot  cure.*' 

Heaven  is  a  theme  too  wonderful  and  exhaust- 
less  to  crowd  irto  a  short  hour  on  earth  with 
our  limited  capacity  and  knowledge.  I  can  onl}^ 
ho|  e  to  ope  J I  the  docjr  and  ask  you  to  look  upon 
cniiiitless  numbers  all  of  which  are  like  unto 
ill*  S(!ii  i  f  God,  and  to  listen  to  the  new  song 
It  1«  le  the  llirone  as  the  voice  of  many  waters 
by  nmi  thousand  times  ten  thousand  without  a 
discord. 

WE  SHALL  HAVE  AN  INCOPEUPTIBLE  BODY. 

'Vl  t  se  mortal  bodies  are  all  born  heirs  to  the 


220 


CARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


cofBn  and  the  ,^rave.  We  j/et  tired  po  easily, 
aud  the  cares  and  responsibilities  of  life  op- 
press us,  and  sickness  and  diseases  in  myriad 
forms  attack  us,  and  old  ag^e  and  death  is  the 
round  period  to  every  mortal  body.  We  all  de- 
sire better  bodies  nnd  when  redemption's  work 
is  complete  we  shall  have  them  Tli«^re  will  be 
no  sin  in  heaven  to  distort  and  wreck  the  bodv, 
no  toil  to  weary  it.  no  sickness  and  corruption 
and  death .  "We  shall  all  be  c1iani2:ed.  F{)r 
this  corruptible  must  put  on  incorrnption,  Rud 
this  mortal  must  put  on  immortality.  So  when 
this  corruptible  shall  have  put  on  incorrnption. 
and  this  mortal  shall  have  put  on  immortality, 
then  shall  be  broui^^ht  to  pass  the  sayinic  that 
written,  ''Death  is  swallowed  up  in  victory.  O 
death  where  is  thy  stintx?  O  irrave,  where  is 
thy  victory?"  Think  of  a  body  that  shall  never 
^et  weary,  that  shall  be  sin,  and  accident,  and 
sic*kness.  and  death  proof;  a  l)ody  ever  at  its 
best,  and  that  shall  shine  with  the  lustre  of  im- 
mortal youth  forever. 

WE  SHALL  HAVE  A  POWERFUL  BODY. 

'*It  is  sown  in  weakness,  it  is  raised  in  power." 
The  ^'lory  of  everybody  here  will  soon  lie  pros- 
trate in  the  dust.  Our  bodies  are  under  the 
controU  of  the  law  of  gravity,  but  as  Elijah  and 
our  Saviour  rose  above  this  law  so  shall  we,  and 
we  shall  be  like  unto  the  ani^els  and  they  travel 


OUR  HEAVENLY  HOME 


221 


witli  \ho  rapidity  of  tl]()ni2:ht.  Jesus  said  he 
could  siininioii  a  If  i^icn  of  ari^els  and  they 
W(juld  be  witli  him  instantly.  The  eye  of  man 
is  a  miracle.  The  nearest  fixed  star  is  19,200,- 
000,000.000  of  miles  distant  and  it  can  be  seen 
by  the  eye.  Witli  the  aid  of  a  telescope  some 
remote  stars  can  be  seen  that  would  take  li^ht 
four  thousand  years  to  reach  if  it  travelled 
at  the  rate  of  nearly  four  miles  per  second.  I 
such  is  the  capacity  of  the  terrestrial  eye  what 
wil'  be  the  power  of  the  celestial  eye?  Stephen 
looked  steadfastly  up  into  heaven,  saw  thcirlory 
of  Gofl.  and  Jesus  standing:  at  the  ri^ht  hand  of 
G(  d.'^  The  eye  shall  see  God  as  he  is,  and 
sweep  the  horizon  of  innumerable  worlds  and 
never  fail  All  the  senses  will  be  multiplied  by 
infinity  of  wisdom  and  ^lory. 

WE  SHALL  HAVE  A  GLORIF  ED  BODY. 

The  body  "is  sown  in  dishonor,  it  is  raised  in 
^lory.-'  Jesus  "shall  change  our  vile  body,  that 
it  may  be  fashioned  like  unto  his  own  glorious 
body."  When  Christ  appeared  after  his  resur- 
rection, "his  face  did  shine  as  the  sun,  and  his 
raiment  was  white  as  the  light."  We  are  now 
in  the  realm  of  glory,  and  if  all  the  figures  and 
imagery  and  eloquence  of  the  English  language 
were  consumed  in  a  description  of  glory,  at 
best  it  could  only  be  said,  "and  it  doth  not  yet 
appear  what  we  shall  be,  but  we  know  that  when 


222  MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


he  shall  appear  we  shall  be  like  him  for  we 
shall  see  him  as  he  is." 

OUR  SOCIAL  CONDITION  IN  HEAVEN. 

"There  shall  be  no  more  curse."  Here  we 
have  the  curse  of  sickness,  and  exhaustion  and 
every  home  is  blighted  with  disappointments 
and  heartaches.  If  every  eye  of  earth  ha^  n nt 
wept  every  heart  has.  There  are  so  many  bro 
ken  homes  by  death,  and  cruelties  and  impuri- 
ties everywhere.  Wayward  sons  and  daughters 
are  bringing  grey  locks  of  parents  in  sorrow  to 
the  grave.  There  are  so  many  ungodly  and  d^- 
signing  people,  but  there  shall  not  be  a  tear  or 
a  sorrow  among  the  glorified  millions.  Per- 
haps there  is  not  a  home  but  wishes  that  «»ome 
one  thing  was  different.  It  may  be  tlie  health 
of  some  one  of  tlie  family  is  the  pall  which 
darkens  the  home,  or  the  toils  and  poverty  of 
the  family  embitter  it.  If  today  you  could 
have  five  of  your  first  desires  concerning  your 
home  granted  you  would  be  the  happiest  of 
men.  In  heaven  every  wish  will  be  met,  and 
your  hap|3iness  will  never  be  tarnished  or  mared 
by  an  imperfection  or  impurity. 

WE  SHALL  HAVE  PERFECT  KNOWLEDGE. 

At  our  best  we  have  only  been  picking-  up 
pebbles  along  the  shore,  but  in  heaven  we  shall 
navigate  every  sea  of  thought,  yea,  "there  shall 
be  no  more  sea,"  all  the  hindrances  shall  be  re- 


OUR  HEAVENLY  HOME 


223 


moved  and  we  shall  see  God  as  he  is.  "Now 
we  see  throui2:h  a  glass  darkly,  but  then  faee  to 
face  "  We  have  not  been  able  here  to  unriddle 
all  the  providences  of  God,  to  interpret  why  our 
most  desired  and  dearest  ones  h^ve  been  ruth- 
lessly torn  from  us,  to  understand  why  the 
plans  of  life  have  been  thwarted,  and  why  pov- 
erty has  bedimed  us  about  on  all  sides,  but  when 
the  aolden  pot  of  m.vnna  is  unsealed  we  shall 
understand  all  the  mysteries  of  his  Providenc® 
and  say,  "God  knew  the  best."  "We  know"  in 
part,  and  w^e  pro})hesy  in  part,  but  when  that 
which  is  perfect  is  couje,  then  that  which  is  in 
part  shall  be  done  away."  We  shall  converse 
with  the  i^reat  authors  of  all  church  song,  with 
the  great  missionaries  and  martys  and  invent- 
ors of  the  ages,  with  the  heroes  and  reformers 
of  the  world,  "and  the  Lamb  which  is  in  the 
midst  of  the  thrcne  shall  feed  them,  and  shall 
lead  them  unto  living  fountains  of  waters."  He 
by  whom  the  w^orlds  were  made  will  make  clear 
to  us  all  the  secrets  of  the  Universe  of  God 
We  think  of  legions  of  woilds,  have  they  a  biblej 
like  our  bible,  w^hat  language  do  they  speak,  did 
Christ  die  to  redeem  them  and  a  thousand  other 
questions,  and  with  the  Apostle  we  cry  out,  "O 
the  depth  of  the  riches  both  of  the  wisdom  and 
knowledge  of  God:  how  unsearchable  are  his 
judgments  and  his  ways  past  finding  out."  Wo 


224 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


shall  fathom  the  depths  of  ktio\vle{li!:e  for  we 
shall  see  him  as  he  is.  How  much  music  does 
the  man  understand  who  is  able  to  appreciate 
the  finest  harmony,  how  much  of  the  artist  can 
the  man  see  who  has  the  ability  to  comprehend 
the  picture  on  the  canvass?  How  lari^e  will 
the  man  be  who  will  be  able  to  see  God  hs  he  is, 
and  appreciate  his  love  and  wisdom  and  provi- 
dence. Free  from  every  drawback  of  earth,  and 
inspired  by  all  the  wisdom  and  goodness  of 
God,  and  with  the  track  of  eternity  before  us 
for  development,  "it  doth  not  yet  appear  what 
we  shall  be,"  but  on  and  on  shall  we  move,  and 
onward  and  upward  shall  we  rise  in  the  scale 
of  knowledo^e  until  with  Bishop  F  oster  we  say, 
*'we  shall  be  almost  half  as  la-j^re  as  God." 

HOW  SHALL  WE  WORSHIP  IN  HEAVEN? 

In  the  church  below  we  liav*^  many  thini^-  to 
interfere  with  our  worship.  There  are  (]iscor;^s 
and  lack  of  heart  often  in  oiir  son^s  of  praise, 
and  the  sermon  is  dull,  and  the  buihlinsj:  not 
always  comfortable,  and  few  comj^arati vely  take 
an  interest,  and  weariness  and  inlirniities  mar 
our  purest  worship,  and  we  are  not  fully  conse- 
crated to  God.  but  in  heaven  "we  shall  serv  ^ 
him  day  and  night  in  his  temple."  With  Da- 
vid and  Charles  Wesley  and  Sankey  and  Bliss, 
and  fill  the  sweet  siuijfers  of  Ts-ael,  and  all  tlie 
redeemed  in  one  grand  chorus  singing  the  **new 


OUR  HEAVENLY  HOME 


225 


song"  before  the  throne,  and  every  voice  per- 
fect and  glorified  what  inspiration  will  thrill 
the  saints  above?  What  a  praise  service  when 
the  worshippers  shall  take  the  crowns  off  their 
heads  and  cast  them  at  his  feet,  and  shout  glory 
and  dominion  and  power  be  unto  the  Lamb  for- 
ever and  ever.  What  testimonies  from  Daniel 
about  the  lion's  den,  and  Moses  about  the  Red 
Sea  and  the  Mountain  of  Transfiguration,  and 
Stephen  and  Paul  and  all  the  saints  about  this 
uttermost  salvation,  and  then  to  hear  the  re- 
deemed hosts  with  glorified  hearts  and  tongues 
say,  "hallelujah  unto  Him  who  hath  loved  us 
and  washed  us  from  our  sins  in  His  own  blood, 
be  glory  and  dominion  forever  and  ever." 

WE  SHALL  HAVE  ETERNAL  LIFE. 

Here  the  rarest  flower  of  the  garden  which 
we  care  for  reaches  maturity,  and  we  only  enjoy 
its  choicest  bloom  for  a  short  hour  and  smell 
its  richest  fragrance  with  a  passing  breath  and 
then  it  is  gone.  You  have  thought  as  you 
looked  upon  your  child  that  you  would  like  to 
keep  her  without  change,  with  dimples  in  her 
cheeks,  and  chubby  fat  hands,  and  flaxen  curls 
and  eyes  of  azure  blue,  but  disease  and  age  mar 
the  little  angel  fresh  from  the  hands  of  Grod. 
You  have  been  on  tJie  Mount  of  Transfiguration 
when  your  peace  flowed  like  a  river,  and  joys 
divine  dispelled  every  doubt  and  fear,  and  great 


226 


MARRIAGE  AND  THE  HOME 


tidal  waves  of  hope  and  assurance  and  love  del- 
ui^ed  yoar  heart,  and  like  Peter  you  wanted  to 
tabernacle  there,  but  soon  you  are  down  airnin 
in  the  valley.  Changes  have  saddened  every 
heart  and  home,  the  thouglit  that  nothing  is 
abiding,  that  our  life  is  but  ''an  hand  breadth." 
In  heaven  the  flower  will  evei  bloom  the  rarest 
and  its  fragrance  will  ever  be  at  its  best,  the 
child  will  wear  its  triple  ci  'wn  of  glory  and  life 
and  rejoicing,  and  your  happiness  Will  ever  in- 
crease, "augmenting  and  increasing  weiulits  of 
glory."  ''Eye  hath  not  seen,  ear  hath  not 
heard,  heart  hath  not  conceived  of  the  joys  and 
glories  which  shall  be  revealed.  This  earth  is 
his  footstool  what  must  his  Paradise  and  Tlirone 
be?  All  figures  and  imageries  are  inadequate 
to  convey  to  our  minds  the  exhaustless  treasures 
of  the  christian's  inheritance.  Jasper  and 
sapphire  and  emerald  and  rubies  and  river  of 
life,  and  streets  of  gold,  arid  crown  of  life,  and 
palms  of  victory,  and  eternal  weights  of  glory 
(mly  jive  us  a  glimpse  of  heaven.  '*  We  are  now 
the  Sons  of  God  and  it  doth  not  yet  appear 
what  we  sliall  be."  Ours  is  a  blessed  hope, 
and  surprises  a  millionfcjld  of  greatei' knowledge 
and  happiness  and  glory  and  eternal  life  await 
us. 

* 'Since  o'er  Thy  footstool  here  below 
Such  radiant,  gems  are  strewn, 


OUR  HEAVENLY  HOME 


227 


Oh   what  rn'ai>niri;-(Mu*e  must,  glow, 
My  Grxi,  j^ho'it  'Vhy  throne: 
So  brilHant  hert' thesi*  drops  f)f  huh'  — 
There  the  full  ocean  rolls,  how  hriuhl  ! 

If  night's  blue  enrtain  of  the  sk\ 

With  thousand  stars  inwrought. 

HuDg  lik^>  a  royal  eano|)\ 

With  glitteriniJf  diamonds  fraiight. 

Bf'  Lord.  Thy  U  mj>lp's  outer  veil. 

What  splen  .or  i\\  the  sluiut-  uoist  dvv<dll 

I'he  dnzzlintJf  SI! n  at  noontide  hour. 

Forth  from  his  fl.-tn  iiej  vase. 

Flinging  o'er  e«rih  th'.'  golden  shower. 

Till  vale  and  mount  am  Id.-iZ*'. 

j^ul  shows.  ()  Lord:  <>n<'  lieai  of'Unne! 

Wliat,  llieii.  tin  d;i\  \>  1  i  n  'Ih  e  <  (  M  shi  ue  ; " 


A  Word  to  Ladies  and  Children. 

If  you  are  sick  of  throat,  or  liin^-,  dififculty, 
— if  you  have  blood  or  liver  couij/laints — if  y(  u 
have  rheumatii>m.  catarrli,  coustipaiio)!,  liead- 
aches,  nervous  prostration — seud  to  Dr.  Reed- 
er's  F.  M.  Co.  for  their  year  hock  wliieh  exi-iaiiis 
all  iheir  splerulid  r^^iu'-^rl iep,  al!  of  which  are 
im  de  of  roots,  herbs,  barks,  seeds  and  flosver?^.- 
Remember  the  place,  JJr  Re,edtr\s  Family  Med- 
icine Co. 

CfRce  and  laboratory  at  114  South  Washii'ij^ 
ton  street,  Peoria,  111.  Year  Books  Free  to 
any  address. 

C.  M.  BROWN, 

(ESTABLISHED  1885} 

Dnderwriter  a„d 

IiiYestnient  Broker 

214  Main  Sti  e3t,  PEORIA,  ILL. 

Insurance  of  All  Kinds 

SURETY  BONDS 

First  MortRaP'e  Loans. ' 


THESE  CHILDREN 

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For 


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WALTER  WYAJT,  Optician, 


1^2  8  MAIN  STREET. 


1.  A.  BERRY. 


W.  R.  BKKRY 


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UNDERTAKERS 


AND 


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©20  I>vd:ai3a  Street, 

PEORIA,  ILL. 

Open  Day  and  Hight. 


PHONE  7  74, 


